To not want to move to Birmingham?

[sorrymissjacksonn]

OH is from Birmingham all his family and friends are there.
We live about 30 mins out of Birmingham in a small town my mums here on her own so I don't really want to leave her.

I love our home our area has less crime rates compared to an area we would be able to afford in Birmingham.

I'm worried about my kids growing up there. He says I'm not thinking about him because he has to do a short 30 minute commute everyday.

His mum and family are full on if we move in near them they will be round everyday.

And I hate the accent even though I have unfortunately started picking it up

Yanbu. It's not the worst of the West Midlands and the city is decent but I can think of a few other places I'd rather live.

Plus as you say the accent is grating.

YANBU, a 30 minute commute isn't that far. And I'm from Birmingham and still live here. The accent could be worse though, could be the Black Country accent

It's somewhere I wouldn't want to live...

It depends where you live and where you'd be moving to. If you are moving to alum rock no, but four oaks for example is nice. But it's all relative to where you live now.

The accent could be worse though, could be the Black Country accent grin

Sorry if I sound stupid but can you explain the difference? I thought it was Black Country. I've lived in Wolverhampton and recall there and Birmingham sounding rather alike, but I haven't been to Birmingham in a while

You’ve given 4 good reasons and then a comment which sounds snobby and prejudiced. Drop the accent argument and stick with the other valid reasons or you will undermine your overall case.

Slagging off the accent is a bit childish. But a 30-minute commute isn’t really that long.

A thirty minute commute is nothing.

Birmingham like all cities has nice bits and not so nice bits though.

Slagging off the accent is a bit childish

Voicing an opinion on an accent is not childish, especially not when you would have to live there and listen to it on a daily basis. No need to get offended.

I've had people tell me my accent is unbearable, to my face. Now that's rude.

Redditch?

I've moved out of Brum a couple of years ago and realised how grouchy the traffic was making me! I live our new rural setting. But I miss the diversity of Brum and the convenience of it all.
There are some v lovely areas so I certainly wouldn't dismiss it.

But you partner is being a prat over 30min commute. I'm assuming he is driving? Even when living in bham, that is nothing depending on where work is. I had a 20-30min commute and was only 3 miles from work when I lived there....

A 30 minute commute is nothing. And as a Black Country girl all the comments about accents seem a tad ridiculous to me.

Where does he commute to? I've lived in four or five parts of Birmingham, never had less than 45min commute - the city is traffic/bus gridlocked and very few train routes.

apart from the usual snobbery about birmingham accents (which i still have 40 years after leaving there and proud of it as its where i was born ) a 30 minute commute is nothing i work 3 miles from my house and getting the bus home can take me 45 minutes to get home some days,

No yanbu. Where i live is the armpit of england. Bham is the arsecrack.

A 30 inure commute? Unless you live on the doorstep of his work I don’t see how that would improve? It takes well over 60 mins in rush hour to get from one side of the city to another. So is he basically saying you’re moving to the area in which he works?

Also - living just 30 mins out of Brum, your accents wont be as dissimilar as you might think (to the untrained ear).

YANBU. It's not somewhere I want to live either, even though I do
Another 9 years minimum for me though

The 30-minute commute sounds as though it may be a bit of an excuse. Are there other reasons your OH wants to be in Birmingham? Perhaps he likes the idea of his full-on family round all the time, and misses his friends? Ask him, and get everything on the table then you can both make an adult decision about what's going to work.

@isseywithcats an opinion on how an accent sounds is not snobbery.

Saying you are better than someone because of an accent would be snobbery. That is NOT what's happening.

He is BU: 30 mins is a tiny commute. But if you did move you’d still be near your mum and could set limits on visits from his family.

I’d love to live in Birmingham it’s a nice city.

Totally understand the family concerns but surely you can still be quite a way from them - or are his family and his work in the same place and he wants to move there?

@AGHHHH it's very different to people who live in the West Midlands, difficult to explain but so easy to tell a brummie and someone from the Black Country apart

30 mins is bugger all. 45 min commute here, and if the traffic is shit up to a 1.15 hrs. YANBU, when it comes to the area you live in, location location location.

having lived with people putting my natural accent down all my life since i left birmingham yes it is snobbery everyone else seems to think thier accent is superior to mine and considering i live in yorkshire theres not much in it and when you have a brummie accent you get fed up of everyone doing a bad impression of it and yes brummie is totally different to black country, black country uses a lot of old fashioned very distinctive words of their own

yes it is snobbery everyone else seems to think thier accent is superior to mine

In my case it definitely is not snobbery, just preference, and I think my own accent gets an equal amount of criticism tbh

And I feel the same about Yorkshire