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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want DH to go out drinking on Christmas Eve

70 replies

user1471433387 · 23/12/2018 11:57

DH has said that on Christmas Eve people from his work will be going out for drinks when they finish. He wants me to come and pick him up. I’d rather him not because I’ll be 38+6 pregnant and I want him to be able to drive me to hospital if I go into labour. I don’t want him to be drunk. Also it would mean I would be on my own all day with DD 19 months, which is fine, but if he can come home and help out then I think he should.

OP posts:
Rarfy · 23/12/2018 11:58

I don't think he should either. Maybe a quick pint but not out for the duration. Terribly selfish under the circumstances

formerbabe · 23/12/2018 12:14

I'm usually very easy going about this sort of thing but in your circumstances, he absolutely shouldn't.

bakingdemon · 23/12/2018 12:15

Christmas Eve is time for family. No way should he be getting drunk with colleagues.

masterandmargarita · 23/12/2018 12:15

No Christmas is family time

Stuckforthefourthtime · 23/12/2018 12:16

I'd say nope too. It's not just the night itself, you want him to be feeling bright and shiny for Christmas day too.

TheQueef · 23/12/2018 12:16

No he shouldn't.
He needs to stay sober.

GemmeFatale · 23/12/2018 12:16

Ask him what the plan is if you go into labour

Sciurus83 · 23/12/2018 12:20

Absolutely no way he should be at home with you and the children it's Christmas Eve FFS!

Soubriquet · 23/12/2018 12:20

No.

If you wasn’t pregnant, then yes he could go but you being so close to your due date and needing a dash to the hospital if it happens, he needs to either go and have soft drinks only or come home

Mumsnut · 23/12/2018 12:21

Also, he will be useless on Christmas morning if he's totally hungover.

Weenurse · 23/12/2018 12:21

Agree, ask for plan if you go into labour

Munchyseeds · 23/12/2018 12:24

I would be making it very clear that I didn't want him to go at all this year....unless he really is one of those people who will only have one drink.
He needs to be with his family in a state to function come what may

snoutandab0ut · 23/12/2018 12:27

Given that you’re pregnant and could give birth imminently then YANBU. If you weren’t pregnant though I’d say YABU. Christmas is whatever you want it to be! Providing everyone gets time to do their own thing sometimes, Christmas doesn’t exclusively have to be about family. I’ve never understood this arbitrary rule that you can’t see friends at Christmas

Cottipus · 23/12/2018 12:28

Definitely not unreasonable- my waters went on Boxing Day last year at 38+4 and DH had to drive me to the maternity unit to be checked out at 1am. Plus who would look after DD?

I’d agree 1-2 drinks then he comes home. There’ll be other years to go out drinking. He should be supporting you and being on standby for anything happening now!

RLOU30 · 23/12/2018 12:28

He should be at home with you and DD on Christmas Eve especially as you might go into labour any day now.

ChristmasTwatteryDoesMyHeadIn · 23/12/2018 12:29

If you weren’t heavily pregnant I’d think YWBU, however given that he could potentially end up pissed as a fart while you’re in labour YANBU and he is!

Original poster
user1471433387 · 23/12/2018 12:29

Thanks everyone! I’ll say I’m happy for him to go to for one as that’s a compromise.

I haven’t asked about how I’d get to the hospital. He probably thinks a taxi.

OP posts:
Lazypuppy · 23/12/2018 12:31

I wouldn't mind him going but he 2ould have to drive himself home.

Means he can only have 1 or 2 and willbe sober so good for xmas morning

GhostSauce · 23/12/2018 12:31

I think fair enough if he wants to go for a quick pint, but no more.

RLOU30 · 23/12/2018 12:32

It’s not about not seeing friends. He is talking about “people from work” going for drinks after work. Personally I would rather come home and spend Xmas eve with my DD and have a fresh head for Christmas Day regardless

GummyGoddess · 23/12/2018 12:34

The taxi drivers I know won't take a woman in labour. They say it's because if there was an accident they would be responsible, plus if your waters went or you vomited in their car you take a days earnings away while they get it cleaned.

No being drunk until baby has arrived.

Puggles123 · 23/12/2018 12:35

As you are so close to your due date I’d say he shouldn’t- maybe go for a soft drink or 2 but come back at a sensible time and in a fit state to drive.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 23/12/2018 12:35

Yanbu. One or two drinks and a taxi home is fine but not getting pissed and then having to fetch him. What would you do with your dc?

CmdrIvanova · 23/12/2018 12:36

He can get tae fuck

wombatsears · 23/12/2018 12:37

YANBU

My waters went at 38+3 and DD was here within 4 hours! That would be barely enough time to sober up properly.