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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think late-term abortion rules may need tightening up?

999 replies

FestiveNut · 23/12/2018 09:11

Should people be able to abort healthy fetuses in a low risk pregnancy past 20 weeks gestation?

I read a very sad story concerning this earlier. I considered myself pro-choice in all circumstances but this thread has caused me to question that.

Should the threshold be lowered?

OP posts:
NothingOnTellyAgain · 23/12/2018 14:19

It's misogynist bullshit to imagine that there will be / is a queue of women wanting abortions at 30 / 35 / 40 weeks just because they suddenly decide they don't fancy it any more.

That right there is the heart of misgyny >

Women are feckless, selfish, inconstant. They should not be allowed to decide their own fate, because of this nature.

decemberfrost · 23/12/2018 14:20

And before anyone has a go at me, the OP asked for opinions and views, and these are mine. And I'm entitled to them.

NothingOnTellyAgain · 23/12/2018 14:21

"And of course women shouldn't be forced to have a baby they don't want, "....

But of course that's exactly what I want them to have to do.

Grin

I AM kind honest I am look I have said so, by the way forced birth is totes awesome

NothingOnTellyAgain · 23/12/2018 14:22

xposts

I posted that before you told poeple not to respond to your post.

What about the what ifs?

Are you against abrtion in all circs past 4 months?

NothingOnTellyAgain · 23/12/2018 14:23

Of it's a moral point that the life of the unborn child is the same worth (or more) as the life of a woman who already exists and may aready have children who are dependent on her etc then I can respect that TBH.

Not agree but respect. nailed colours to the mast and all that.

TwistedStitch · 23/12/2018 14:24

And before anyone has a go at me, the OP asked for opinions and views, and these are mine. And I'm entitled to them.

Yes you are entitled to your views, but not have them go unchallenged on a discussion board. How ridiculous.

Orlande · 23/12/2018 14:25

Please tell me your why you have a preference for it to be as early as possible?
Because having to wait when you need an abortion is awful and distressing?
Women may be very unwell, physically or mentally, so the abortion should be done ASAP.
The earlier in the pregnancy it is performed the safer it is, less distressing and the woman has more options.

Why wouldn't you want it done as early as possible Confused

Bowlofbabelfish · 23/12/2018 14:25

So why on earth anyone would abort at 6 months, I don't know.

Some conditions don’t become apparent until later on. Some women genuinely don’t find out until later on. While I was barfing within days of conception I know one person who found out at 25 weeks.

No one has a termination at six months for social reasons. The only people I know who have had later terminations had severe, incompatible with life conditions diagnosed quite late. Both heartbroken.

ElonMask · 23/12/2018 14:27

They should not be allowed to decide their own fate, because of this nature.

No one has implied this. At 35 weeks it's not a decision they can take by themselves is it ? Someone has to agree to kill the baby in the womb (because delivering it and either killing it then or letting it die would be barbaric). Would you be willing to perform such a procedure ? If not why do you think you are entitled to have a supply of people who are, and if the state can't find them they're breaching your rights ? It's mental.

redandyellowandpinkandgreen99 · 23/12/2018 14:30

I can't believe that someone asked 'why would you want it done as early as possible?' What a strange question.

YANBU OP. The threshold should be made lower. Unless there is a good reason for it. (Like a condition that wasn't picked up earlier.)

NothingOnTellyAgain · 23/12/2018 14:30

Elon it is exctly implied.

You are saying again there will be a queue of women and girls wanting abortions at 35 weeks for no reason at all other than they fancy it.

You are then holding these women up and saying how awful how could they why should they.

I am challening your idea that there would be a queue and saying that your utter belief that there would be a queue is misogyny > it exposes an underlying view of women as feckless selfish inconstant etc etc

Orlande · 23/12/2018 14:31

So why on earth anyone would abort at 6 months, I don't know.

Give it two minutes thought...

The most obvious thing is how many weeks we're you when you had your anomaly scan?
How long do you think it might take to have a follow up, speak to a doctor, do some research, actually make a decision.
Then how long to actually get the abortion?

And that's before you consider women in more difficult situations.

NothingOnTellyAgain · 23/12/2018 14:31

You're getting worked up and angry over all these women who want to terminate at 35 weeks for no reason.

Can't you see that assuming this will happen a fair amount shows up a belief that women are pretty fucking selfish and horrible?

Hohocabbage · 23/12/2018 14:32

twistedstich thanks for your post, I havent been able to articulate how i both accept that abprtions shpuld be freely available and yet feel that they are taking away a life and your post put it clearly for me.
I would have said unborn babies were not "alive" until i had the experience of losing some which changed my views. It is hard to feel sad at the loss of someone's baby without appearing to judge their choice. But surely you can do both.

Thesearmsofmine · 23/12/2018 14:34

@decemberfrost

Plenty of people have no ide tht they are pregnant at 16 weeks. If you don’t have regular periods and aren’t ttc for example. With ds3 I wouldn’t have known, I felt fantastic but I was ttc so was testing.

The anomaly scan that happens around 20(can be as late as 22 here weeks picks up on medical conditions that are incompatible with life. Should those people not be given the choice to terminate?

decemberfrost · 23/12/2018 14:35

I mean I don't understand why or HOW a woman could abort at 6 months in when there is no medical reason to.

Thought that was obvious, seeing as how that is what the thread/the original post is about. Confused

Cornettoninja · 23/12/2018 14:36

People are so blazè with their attitudes to ending a life

Conversely it’s equally incomprehensible to others how some people are so blaze about the physical and mental health of another human being and the lack of concern for their futures.

TwistedStitch · 23/12/2018 14:42

No problem hoho I think some anti abortionists try to use the 'taking a life' argument as a kind of gotcha, because there can surely be nothing worse than ending a life. I don't think some pro-choicers help when they try to claim that a foetus isn't actually alive because a foetus clearly is a life form, but also because it gives the impression that the foetus not being a life is what makes abortion okay.

Pandamodium · 23/12/2018 14:45

I mean I don't understand why or HOW a woman could abort at 6 months in when there is no medical reason to.

Another birth would likely kill me. I died on the operating table with DS.

Is that a good enough reason?

And I know damn well what a 6 month baby looks like.

Orlande · 23/12/2018 14:47

december - didn't know they were pregnant, mental health issues, substance abuse/chaotic lifestyle, abusive relationship, rape/incest, concealed pregnancy, pregnant child who didn't understand what was happening, domestic violence beginning or escalating in pregnancy, relationship breakdown, homelessness, an existing child becoming ill, difficulty accessing abortion services or having to save money in order to travel.
All non-medical reasons.

NothingOnTellyAgain · 23/12/2018 14:47

"I mean I don't understand why or HOW a woman could abort at 6 months in when there is no medical reason to."

Becasue they're 13 and didn't know?
Because they have been held as a prisoner / effective prisoner by a partner or other party?
Because they didn't know they were pregnant?
Because horrible mental health issues come to the fore (does that count as a medical reason? Often it's only physical issues for the baby that "count" and not for the mother or mental health issues for her).
Sure there are more...

NothingOnTellyAgain · 23/12/2018 14:49

"Conversely it’s equally incomprehensible to others how some people are so blaze about the physical and mental health of another human being and the lack of concern for their futures."

  • the futures of any existing children.

Once they are born, the pro life people have very little interest in how children get on, seems to me.

Pandamodium · 23/12/2018 14:52

Once they are born, the pro life people have very little interest in how children get on, seems to me.

There is many things worse then death and people struggle to get there heads round that.

Drogosnextwife · 23/12/2018 14:52

@Cornettoninja

Nope I am not blazè in my attitude towards the mothers health. Have already said that I don't agree with abortion but I don't think a woman who does not want a child should be forced to have one.

Also, anyone having an abortion at a very late stage just because they don't fancy being pregnant and didnt take the proper precautions to make sure it didn't happen is probably better off never becoming a mother.
There are thousands of abortion s carried out I would imagine every day world wide, probably more. Please do not expect me to believe they are all because of medical problems, contraception failing or abuse. A lot may be but not most.

I know of around 6 women who have had abortions, 1 of them has had 3, 1 has had 2, both of those women have 2 living children. Out of all of those women only 1 had an abortion due to medical complications.

surferjet · 23/12/2018 14:56

Agree.
It should be reduced to 16 weeks maximum for social reasons.
Termination at 24 weeks must be extremely traumatic and ( imo ) a lot harder than waiting a few more months and giving the baby up for adoption.