To think charity is starting to steal Christmas!!

[KnightlyMyMan]

So to clarify - we are charitable- we donate generously via monthly direct debit to several good causes and in person (before anyone jumps on the scrouge bandwagon).

However, I’ve just (for the zillionth time) been faced with another ‘don’t buy gifts/ Christmas cards - just donate money in the persons name’ appeals.

This year seems to be really really pushy about this 😡 more so than ever before and it seems aimed to make people feel shitty/ selfish!

• I’ve noticed a trend in not sending cards - with several friends putting blanket messages on social media saying they won’t be sending any but donating instead so obviously it’s working!

Awesome- I’ll hang your Facebook message on my card tree shall I? 😒
Am I the only person who likes receiving cards (already in aid of good charities?), who actually enjoys opening them and displaying them? I recycle them all post Christmas and buy recycled cards each year so really don’t see the harm - it feels like a lazy cop out to say ‘I’ll just donate instead’ and not very festive or personal!

And no, I don’t really want you to donate in my name and present this to me as a gift. Charity is a personal thing and shouldn’t be inflicted on anyone! I have struggling family members who actually rather rely on Christmas gifts for rare luxury items but have too much pride to say anything if suddenly we started ‘donating in their name’!

Also- One ‘stuggling’ familiy member mentioned yesterday their anxiety over donating cash becoming the ‘social norm’ as they currently make very low cost gifts and wouldn’t be able to give cash. They felt that this becoming ‘the done thing’ It would highlight who can/can’t afford to write cheques! Like being the poor kid at non uniform day- adult edition.

Next it’ll be ‘don’t do a big fancy Christmas dinner or crackers- just donate the cost and have a burger instead!’

I get that it’s a good cause but can they just stop trying to steal Christmas out from under people who enjoy it ?!?!?

I don't care if you don't want to do Christmas cards but the charity thing is wanky virtue signalling.

I have under a dozen christmas cards this year and that suits me just fine I give to elderly relatives my mum amd a couple of neighbours cards just end up in the bin total waste. I think peple giving to charity instead of cards and postage is much better.

i put christmas cards into the bin unopened . most presents go to charity shop with tags on/ still unopened box. Why anyone wants to receive clutter is beyond me, but i’m glad for everybody who stops sending it to me. I of course say thank you etc for all the stuff received, but i really, really wish people would stop.

I think my mum spent £30 on postage bugger that.

I don't like Christmas cards - the cats knock them over all the time and I don't like them on walls or doors. They are so wasteful environmentally too, so am much happier donating to a charity although I send one to DH, DS and DD and PIL and DH's grandma.

I hate Christmas cards. I hate finding space in my house. I hate writing them. I hate the waste. I don't do them and I don't except to receive them.

YANBU. I also think there are other impacts that people doing consider like the many Christmas card manufacturers, printers, artists, etc who will lose out with this trend of not buying and sending cards. Someone will always pay with their job.

I have never understood why you would give a christmas card to someone you see everyday. Where I come from, the christmas card is a little reminder that you still think about someone you are no longer in regular contact with. Everyone else goes out for christmas drinks, or a meal, or just says "merry christmas", and I think handing someone a card instead of doing these things is a teeny bit mean and a cop out..

Christmas is a great time to reconnect with people you love, but life has gotten in the way of seeing, and bit of cardboard with your name and theirs on doesn't really cut it.

I also give to charity (mostly animal, admittedly) year 'round, so I feel no guilt whatsoever about losing the stress, and oneuppmanship of the card cartel.. but I do always buy a Crisis Christmas place, just because it makes me feel good...

*don't consider

Well I design Christmas cards (along with other cards), so I love a card.

My close family and friends are scattered throughout the world. I send and receive Christmas cards from them with a brief sentence or two about how they are. I love getting them. Seems very personal to me.

I don't give them to people I see all the time.

I also don't get the charity v Christmas card thing. Give it, but you don't have to tell everyone about it.

YANBU

I love receiving Christmas cards too, and luckily from friends and family who actually write something in them, instead of scribbling a signature - which is completely pointless! Nice enough when it's the neighbour, a supplier or my dentist, but otherwise lazy and wasted.

I don't really display them, the kids put them on a door in the kitchen if they like, but I like getting mail and news.

I still do Christmas cards. There are many friends and relatives in my home country that I don’t often see and we appreciate the card exchange each year. I notice that fewer people are doing it now but I’m sticking with the tradition.

‘it’s bad for the environment’ is as fair if but seems to disregard the economy.

Unfortunately the economy is reliant on things that are ‘bad for the environment’ but just a pollution is damaging the planet - millions of production, manufacturing and similary linked jobs being lost by nobody purchasing ‘cheap tat’ or ‘cards’ anymore isn’t idea either, is it?

As the population expands the economy has to grow with it and that’s why everything around us gets bigger and more intense/ over done.

I’m really missing not getting cards, I think I only have 3 so far this year. I love putting cards up and getting a handwritten card. I buy charity cards so I’m still donating to charity.

Someone I gave a card to last week said that they no longer do cards as they are bad for the environment, I don’t understand this as paper is recyclable and I often turn cards into gift tags for the next year.

are Xmas cards on the decline generally then?

I don't really do xmas so not sure.

I stopped sending cards about 12 years ago. I actually didn't know a stamp was 64p now.

quite irritated by the few cards I've received this year - not the fault of the senders, but my dad died a few weeks ago so they have all just gone in the bin, barely read them. Xmas is often something to be endured but more so this year.

I hate writing cards. Ive got really shitty handwriting like a childs. But if i refused to do id get moaned at by DM.

Charity donations are not wanky virtue signalling. Let’s hope this becomes the socially acceptable alternative to the charade of the Xmas cards exchange.

I’ve been at my current address for 7 years. The previous owners still get a few cards every year. Is this a true feeling exchange or just a chore? If people have no idea they’ve moved away 7 years ago.

I donate more at Xmas, the only downside is the regular follow up throughout the year to donate an extra tenner for an additional campaign or other.

Charity donations are good, boasting about giving to charity is wanky.

We’ve made a charitable donation this year instead of cards (although we sent a small number to grandparents). Two reasons, 1. My mum is very poorly and I don’t have the time or energy to write 50+ cards this year, and 2. Our eldest made a very good argument for not doing this full stop because of environmental concerns - same with wrapping paper.
We’ve made a significant donation to two charities related to both points. We did tell people on social media, but only because we wanted to thank people for their cards and give them good wishes and to know we’re thinking of them. Don’t care whether people think we’re being knobs, we’ve done this for good reason and will probably do it again next year. People are free to send cards, or not, as they want.
Seen a lot of similar posts this year and I just think ‘good on them’.
What makes me far more cross is people sharing third-party fundraising posts when they clearly haven’t donated (or have any intention of donating) themselves. Only share what you feel strongly enough about to donate.

I agree - I feel charity fundraisers are taking over and sucking the fun out of a lot of things at the moment which will inevitably lead to empathy fatigue. I am a runner and the number of races that I can't get a place for - from my local (London) marathon downwards because charities buy up so many places that there are not that many for the ballot is really frustrating.

However I do have an annual subscription to a small business that designs on line animated cards to email to friends - they have some lovely designs. It means I am still showing friends I am thinking of them without the environmental damage - and I get to support a small business. As I general rule I try to separate charity from Christmas as I dislike all the "buy a goat" nonsense. To me it seems a bit PA/bragging - charity should be a private matter. (Having said that the money I save by not buying Christmas cards did get donated to the local foodbank last month.)

I mean that we told people we’d made a donation and to which charities, but not how much.

I am going to be completely honest and admit that I judge people that don’t make the effort to send them to people who they know would be pleased to receive one (and it is a bit of a chore) as being a tiny bit selfish or lazy (sorry, but I’m being honest there!) and it makes me like them a very tiny bit less. Obviously, each to their own. 🤣🤣

@HellsBellsAndBatteredBananas - ignore the snotty comments above - using fabric offcuts and recycled clothes is a good way to go - I have been making wine bottle bags out of the legs of worn out jeans for some years now - long lasting and environmentally friendly - and wrapping presents in fabric retrieved from old t shirts. THis year I'm going to wrap in newspaper and tie with ribbons cut from an old gingham school dress that got covered in black paint.

I don’t like Christmas cards really. Recycling takes energy so it’s not as good for the environment as just not making the cards in the first place. Don’t mind the odd one posted to people but what’s the point in giving a card to someone you see anyway? I have no issue with Facebook posts instead. Just talk to people or give them a festive hug if you see them.

I agree on charity gifts though. It’s not fair to use someone else’s gift to make yourself feel virtuous. Unless they ask for that of course, I’d be happy to buy it for someone if that’s what they really wanted.

Over consumption and commercialisation stole Christmas years ago. Charity not so much. I only send cards to elderly relatives as they appreciate it. I also ask for no gifts or if people insist I ask for vouchers. Our lives are full of crap we don't need.