AIBU to avoid unvaccinated child?

[SundayGirlB]

Currently pregnant with first child so may be over anxious, but worried about introducing our new baby to children in the family who are not vaccinated.

I think it's irrational and irresponsible not to vaccinate. WIBU to avoid until mine is vaccinated? It defo won't go down well but oh well.

YaNBU. If you did see them then you would be risking your baby’s life. Wait until they have had their vaccinations.
I know chances of catching something are very slim but it could happen.

Well your child won't be fully vaccinated until they are 3.5 so it's a long time to avoid.

Not vaccinating is daft but you are never going to know if any child at baby group/nursery/soft play is also unvaccinated so it seems silly to avoid one specific child for this reason.

It seems a bit over the top?

If you've been vaccinated, there's hardly an issue.

The children are very unlikely to catch measles or anything, because most people are vaccinated those diseases are rare.

I don't think you're being unreasonable at all. I would state clearly why I was avoiding them and leave it at that. Their choice not to vaccinate (selfish fools) and your choice not to risk exposure.

Yanbu

I would do the same

Not worth the risk

I had the same. Relatives with kids completely unvaccinated ‘because it doesn’t feel right’ I refused to visit until my baby had had his jabs and told them why. They are fairly laid back hippies though so didn’t seem to mind too much.

I'd just avoid them out of principle, assuming they decided not to vaccinate as opposed to there being medical reasons why they couldn't.

I wouldn't knowingly have my newborn around unvaccinated children. I'm sure she will be at some point, but if I have the knowledge and chance to avoid it, then I'll be doing so. They've made their choice, you can make yours.

But what about public transport? Nursery? Kids' activities and parties?

As Eurochick says, it will be a long time until your child is fully vaccinated. It might not be practical to avoid for that long, much as I do agree that not vaccinating without very good reason is totally irresponsible

I think the best you can do is get all of your own child's vaccinations done on time. When you go out and about to baby groups and preschool you will have no way of knowing which children are vaccinated and which are not. There is usually no problem.

I now know that at least one of the friends my children had is unvaccinated. I don't think that is a wise parenting decision, but given that I didn't even realise until they were teenagers I say nothing. Mine always had all of their vaccinations.

Re nursery etc, im not sure how they monitor this but know this child has been turned away from certain groups due to not being vaccinated so think i'd have a bit of security there. Not sure how likely close contact with children is on public transport.

But 3.5 years is a long time not sure how id mange this! I want to be doing it for the right reasons and not to 'make a point' though I do feel very strongly on this topic.

I've taken children to loads of toddler groups, play groups, music and gym type classes over the years - I've never been asked about their vaccination status. Nurseries might ask but I don't think they can legally exclude unvaccinated children (in the UK at least). So you will probably come into contact with unvaccinated children at some point without knowing it, including children who are not vaccinated for medical reasons, not just because of parental choice.

Wouldn’t you then have to avoid all babies too young to complete the vaccinations schedule

Medical reasons is completely different. That's why we need to vaccinate children to give the vulnerable herd immunity. Not vaccinating your child because of pseudo-science and then forcing the risk, because as many of you have pointed out it's unavoidable, on other parents pisses me off. But looks like there's no other option.

You'd better not ever leave the house with your baby then seeing as you have no way of knowing whether the kid in the post office queue behind you is vaccinated or not.

Or you could just live your life as normal.

YANBU, but you won't know who is vaccinated and who isn't at most baby groups as I was never asked for any of the groups we attended. We had to provide the red book as proof of vaccinations at nursery, however.

YANBU. But also I assume you’ll breastfeed? That should help give you some feeling of security to help with the anxiety. I’m sure the OP understands that you can’t completely protect your child, but knowingly putting a newborn in harm’s way is just foolish.

Thanks, sarky replies are always helpful for genuine anxiety.

Sorry that was for titchy dont know how to reply properly. But thank you to people putting it into proportion. I suppose I am just worrying.

YANBU

I wouldn't see any family who had wilfully chosen to not vaccinate. Out of principal I would cut them off, even if it were my family members.

Anti-vaxers need to be treated with the same level of disdain they apply to science. In fact, if I had my way, I would ban them any right to medical access.

There will always be some homeopathic snakeskin oil practioner ready to treat them.

I'm not that risk adverse & would probably mark you down as someone I didn't have stuff in common with (I DO vaccinate, btw, just that I take other risks you probably also don't approve of).

You're the one who has to deal with family fall out. Your price to pay.

If you have health anxiety please do something about it in that case.

An unvaccinated child is not a risk.

The risk is only is mixing with a child WITH the illness. Like it or not, it is highly unlikely the unvaxxed kid will actually get measles, mumps etc thanks to the rest of us.

In fact, if I had my way, I would ban them any right to medical access.

Yes of course - because babies and children deserve to die painfully in order to make the point that their parents made stupid decisions.

I wouldn't say i have a health anxiety but would say rising rates of measles and other childhood diseases in Europe and America are an indication that this is increasingly a risk. Easy to write off legit concerns as a health anxiety and seems popular in mumsnet to do this to undermine.

Generally not that risk adverse either tbh. Just aware this is an increasing problem.

But unless they actually HAVE measles they're not going to give it to your child.

Yes I understand that Titchy. I suppose a lot of it is principle, maybe more than I realised.