To ask if you are a teacher, do you judge children by their siblings?

[Starchristmas]

Just that really, honestly?

I've got a child starting school in 2019. Older sibling went through our local school and has now left. Doing fine in KS3.

Dc1 had a few problems at the school, nothing too serious, low level stuff like getting easily distracted, chatting in class. All pretty much ironed out by the time they left, never got in serious trouble or anything like that.

On the whole dc1 has a happy time at the school, but at times lots of things could have gone better. Things dc could have done better, things I could have done better and things that the school could have done better.

I'm looking at sending dc2 to the school however I don't want them to be prejudged based on their older sibling. I want them to have every chance in their own right as an individual.

They're very different children so I'd hope they'd be treated as such.

Secondary teacher and no I definitely don't, but then I teach a lot of different kids so siblings aren't always obvious.

No, children are individuals (I was judged on the basis of cousins I'd never met when I went to secondary and it annoyed me then, plus poor DB had to follow in my footsteps).

I think if I'd had run-ins with a parent I might be aware/wary of that if I knew they were a sibling, but probably I wouldn't even notice until I needed to contact home, though I teach secondary so possibly different.

I failed to notice I had a set of twins in one class, their surname is so common I have four pupils in that class with the same surname, so didn't clock the dates of birth. I bet I looked a right knob at parents evening, when it dawned on me!

Nope!

Nope and tbh unless they have a v unusual surname or tell me “you taught my brother/sister” I often don’t notice! Plus teachers teach lots and lots of siblings, we are aware of how completely different they can be.

Nope and by the sounds of things your dc1 wasn't enough of a PITA to remember.

No. I’ve taught enough siblings to know they’re often very different.

No way

Nope. Siblings are most usually completely different personalities. @frlrlrubert I did that once too. Taught twins for almost a year before I clocked they were related. They didn’t look too much the same and they never seemed to even interact with each other. Very common surname so I really never clocked.

There probably won’t be any teachers left in the school who taught DC1, the way things are going in education.

Apart from that, I’ve taught loads of siblings and it turns out they’re individual people who can be very different, so no prejudging. What they do have in common is their parents, so if you were an arsehole parent that might be remembered.

i agree that you dont always notice. I taught a girl who waa the exact oppoaite of her brother in every way. I had no idea they were siblings until a colleague told me.

I wouldnt pre judge because i know siblings can be different. If the parent had been difficult or had a reputation then it would be hard not to assume the worst but I wouldn't take it out on the child.

My youngest are 2 years apart and Reception Teacher has mixed them up so much she's written the elder child's name in his learning journal.

They are completely different in everything but looks so I can't imagine it'll last long....youngest is feral

No, never.

Secondary. I don't ever judge siblings negatively but I must admit that when I'm particularly fond of a student and I'm being told I'll be teaching their younger siblings I've got some pre love for them

As a PP has said in secondary we teach so many students and so many classes we rarely notice. I found out the other day that I teach twins - one in each of Y9 my classes!! Their mum is my colleague and I hadn’t realised that either!

God no, I've taught many sets where one has been balanced and lovely and the other completely grey hair inducing. Even in the most challenging, chaotic, extended families, there's kids who definitely have their game face on and clearly just want to get on and get away.

Good God no way!!! They are all so different!!

I have twins - most teachers don't even know they are related.

Recently a teacher who taught both for 3 years expressed his suprise at this information on parents evening.

If dc1 has already left and dc2 not yet started there might not be much overlap. Mine three have between them had about 21 primary school teachers. Only twice has any teacher had two of the children. One of those only had one of the dc for a few weeks. Only one child left in primary but none of the teachers who taught the older ones are left so will be no more overlapping children. I think that unless your eldest was 'that child' or you were 'that parent' you don't have much to worry about. If you encounter a teacher again who remembers just say 'oh dc2 is so different to dc1'.

What they do have in common is their parents, so if you were an arsehole parent that might be remembered.

Very true!

No. Siblings are frequently very, very different from each other.
As others have said, I would inwardly sigh if the parent had been a pain, that I was going to have to deal with that confrontation again, but I'd never judge the child on their sibling.

DC have been judged (both for better or worse). It's pretty obvious. Comments made in both primary & secondary.

Interesting. Two of mine are 5 years apart and quite a few teachers have made the connection. Some have compared the youngest favourably to the eldest. She is very very organized, him not so much. Large London secondary school. They do look similar and my kids have always argued they are distinctive looking so now I think they may be right.

Ds1 was a naughty boy dd1 followed and was perfect at school !!! Ended up headgirl ds2 was pretty good so by this point the teachers never knew whet they would get !!! Then ds3 arrived again a bit naughty but with the ability to charm all he comes in contact with . We have a super unusual name so the poor teachers must of braced themselves each year for what type would come next

Oh they all just a year apart from each other so teachers had them all for a long time

Of course not.