Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Sons dad is having Santa on Xmas eve

79 replies

Hariboqueen1 · 20/12/2018 09:14

I’m actually hoping someone will say it doesn’t matter and I’m being ridiculous. So basically my son is staying at his dads the day before Xmas eve and he told me yesterday that he is telling my son that Santa is coming early and on Christmas Eve. So on Christmas Eve Eve my son is putting out carrots mince pies etc and on Christmas Eve morning Santa is leaving a stocking and presents under the tree. So basically everything that happens on Christmas Day. I’m really annoyed about it and I think it’s selfish as my son is having a Christmas morning on Christmas Day he doesn’t need two, his dad is only doing it as he wants to experience the whole thing. I think this will confuse my son and just make it so unbelievable he’s only 5. Why would he get two stockings? He’s literally going to have so many presents from santa. Why can’t he just say the presents are from him. I think it takes away the magic of Christmas morning, the excitement that Santa has been as of course he’s been as he came the day before. If he told me this weeks ago I would have tried to persuade my son to stay there Christmas night as I just think it’s werid to have two santa visits. What does everyone else think? Would you be annoyed?

OP posts:
Ooplesandbanoonoos · 20/12/2018 09:16

I think its fine and would not be annoyed.
He will be excited and enjoy it.

Lettermethis · 20/12/2018 09:16

Two Santa visits have got to be better than one! It's great he's making such an effort with your son and he's entitled to make great memories with him, just as you do.

Flowers
TheGoodEnoughWife · 20/12/2018 09:16

I think it is a good idea. 5yr old will still be excited Christmas Day.

He is just trying to share Christmas with his son just like you want to.

Children adapt.

Unihorn · 20/12/2018 09:17

We did this for my stepdaughter one year. We told him that we'd arranged a special one off visit from Father Christmas and that she couldn't tell anyone that he'd visited twice. It never occurred to us that anyone would have an issue and her mum thought it was a nice idea too.

Do you alternate Christmas arrangements each year? We don't so never get to see DSD on Christmas morning. Now that we have other children together we can't get away with the "secret early" visit either. We only did it once.

I do think you are being slightly petty.

Oddsocksandmeatballs · 20/12/2018 09:18

I think it's a lovely idea, there is no reason Father Christmas can't visit twice.

itswinetime · 20/12/2018 09:18

What was your plans for next year when he was with his dad on Christmas Day?

He gets double the magic sounds good. And if all the presents are from Santa there is no oh look what dad got win win

Original poster
Hariboqueen1 · 20/12/2018 09:18

You’ve actually made me feel better thank you worrying for nothing as usual 😂

OP posts:
PoutySprout · 20/12/2018 09:19

You know Santa is made up, right?

Lavende · 20/12/2018 09:19

His Dad obviously wants to be involved in the whole magic of Christmas which is why he’s doing a version of it on the day he has him. Your son is lucky he cares enough.

BernardsarenotalwaysSaints · 20/12/2018 09:20

I think that's a daft thing for you to be annoyed over & is a good way for his Dad to experiemce the excitement with him. He'll still be excited on Christmas morning too.

SantasBassoon · 20/12/2018 09:20

I think it's a good idea too. Santa's on flexi-time.

Sirzy · 20/12/2018 09:20

Look at it from the other POV. When next year he is with his dad on Christmas morning would you not want to be able to enjoy the Santa side?

WhoKnewBeefStew · 20/12/2018 09:21

I think it’s a brilliant idea, your dc will love it at that age.

MadameJosephine · 20/12/2018 09:21

I can’t see a problem. My daughter’s dad does this on Boxing Day every year. I have her Christmas Eve and Santa comes to mummy’s house then he picks her up late afternoon Christmas Day and Santa comes to daddy’s house that night. She loves having an ‘extra’ Christmas and it means both her parents get to have that special time with her.

knittedjest · 20/12/2018 09:22

If it annoys you that much swap days with him and he can do it on Christmas instead.

Powerbunting · 20/12/2018 09:22

Santa and his elves do a practice run don't they? To children with two homes.... gets the reindeer all warmed up ready for the big day.

Bluebonnieblue · 20/12/2018 09:23

You are being unreasonable. Are you worried your son will have too much fun? Or too much excitement? Too much happiness maybe? It's not like the Santa story is believable as it is, the man flies in on reindeer. If anything, him having to take two days to drop off the presents is more believable. His dad deserves to be involved in the Christmas joy too. I think this is a great compromise.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 20/12/2018 09:23

I think you're right and your ex can't really do Santa on Xmas Eve. He could do a stocking at his on Xmas Eve and then say to DS that Santa had left him stuff there too when he next goes to his house. Or could you do all stockings at your house on Xmas Day before your ex goes.

Yesitwasmethistime · 20/12/2018 09:23

I can’t see a problem either.

TheDHand · 20/12/2018 09:24

I think it sounds like a lovely idea. No rowing about who gets your son on Christmas Day, just your ex making the best of what has been agreed, and having a special time with your son. If you tell your son that Santa is magically able to do two deliveries depending where your son is staying, he will believe it.

Racecardriver · 20/12/2018 09:24

Suggest he does a Christmas Eve box instead?

MrsJayy · 20/12/2018 09:24

Your son will be excited and relieved Santa came to his dads house it isa great idea, little kids can fret about stuff like this and worry his happiness is more important than the logistics of SantaXmas Smile

zippey · 20/12/2018 09:26

Think about it being about your sons feelings rather than yours. So yes I think it’s a great idea, he will be very happy.

NancyDonahue · 20/12/2018 09:27

It will be lovely for your ds, op Its not wrong, it's just different, and even more magical! He will have such a great time Xmas Smile

TheLittlestLightOnTheTree · 20/12/2018 09:27

The only problem here is yourself

You see your ex as having taken the shine off the Xmas morning you have planned. Stealing your thunder.

Your kid will enjoy both!!

Swipe left for the next trending thread