For being furious that dh's boss called him a "kiddy fiddler"?

[angrywithboss]

dh came home from work yesterday, very upset, as his boss had been looking through some photos and said, "Look dh, you look like a kiddy fiddler in this one!" apparently she thought it was a huge joke.

as someone who actually has firsthand knowledge of "kiddy fiddlers" i find her comment very upsetting (although she doesn't know my history, obviously) - i don't really think it's something to be joked about, especially not in that context.

so i'm still feeling extremely upset and angry this morning, to the point where i want to email her and tell her what a stupid bitch she is - don't worry, i won't - but i also don't feel like it's any of my business really.

i've changed my name for this as i know she sometimes uses this site, and while i don't care if she knows who i am in RL i don't want her knowing my MN id.

AWB if it's that bad he should hunt for a new job. THing is, though, it's up to him. You're his partner, not his mum and he has to sort this situation himself.

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She can't fire him for that

you need to say something at the time

'I don't think that's appropriate' when they say it put them on the backfoot

not pranny around discussing it for a couple of days and dragging it up again

when on the recieving end of sexist comemnts at work I always say 'oh dear I dont think you aer allowed to say that are you' or pretend to get notebook and pen out in joky way

shuts them up

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then we all laugh about it but they look slightly nervous

PPB - she can fire him for whatever she likes. she's the boss of the whole company. just before xmas when i was heavily pg she almost sacked him for having too much time off to go to emergency scans with me! she also phoned him while i was in labour and had a go at him for daring to take his paternity leave!

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oh yes Enid

Poise Personified

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ok so this is part of wider issue

(although taking loads of time off for scans frowned on chez Enid [harsh])

he needs to look for another job

if you're going to fight this woman eventually you have to do what I tell my six year old

Pick Your Battles

the trouble is, not everyone is stunningly beautiful and articulate. dh is very intelligent but very shy with it, and not the sort of person to instantly come back with a witty response. especially not to someone who essentially holds her future in the balance...

holds our future in the balance, sorry.

he's been looking for another job since Nov 06. no luck yet.

what a truly disgusting thing to say.

i always poke my nose into dps work when i feel its warranted. if his boss had said that to him i would have spoken to him about it. but then when it comes to dealing with his boss my dp has no backbone so to speak. so would let his boss walk all over him if he could.

i think this woman needs to be spoken to. as she could say this to someone less 'controlled' (cant think of a better word ) and end up getting lamped. also she needs to know that its a disgusting thing to say.

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oh and at one point it wasn't clear whether ds was going to survive, hence the scans and earlier than planned paternity leave.

this has nothing to do with the comment though does it

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yes Cod, you're right, why did i?

probably because i was 20weeks pg at the time

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sorry, i'm meandering off the point. it's turned into a general bitter rant about stupid bitch boss

marquees? wtf was all that about then?