My MIL is very annoyed and upset because my DC have said they don't want to go stay in her house over the holidays. I have 3 boys age (nearly) 15, 12 and 8.
The only time she sees them is when she has wanted them to stay over with her and FIL. She also won't have them if it benefits me e.g. we want to go away for weekend, out one night or if I am sick. It is always on her terms. She has babysat for us once in 15 years. Her reasons are that she doesn't want me around when she is with them. She hasn't had them once at her house for the past 2 years because she has been busy with friends and always been playing bowls or on a cruise somewhere. Meanwhile my 2 eldest grew up.
She has asked to have them for 3 nights during the holidays (between Christmas and NY when DH is rarely off and we have lots of family plans) and my 2 eldest have said they don't want to go. They say it is boring and they just want to stay home or go out with their friends. My youngest doesn't want to go either. They say they just sit round watching TV what FIL wants to watchand do nothing and all PILs friends come round to see them and chat or they go round to PILs friends' houses to introduce them.
MIL has of course blamed me as usual. I am controlling and turned them against her. She has said that when they are older she will just go straight to them without having to go via me. I block her apparently.
I've told my DH that I am very happy for them to drive over and pick up DC and take them out. I've even suggested places e.g. films they want to watch, places they want to go to or lunch out but they don't. They just want them sat on their sofa.
I've told my DS's that they don't have to go if they don't want to. MIL has had a hissy fit though. My anxiety has gone up because whenever I don't tow the line I get some kind of punishment. I don't know what it will be, but it will be forthcoming. She hasn't dished it out yet so it is going to be a good one.
FYI, DH agrees with me and does stand up to her, but I am the one who clearly is manipulating him and my DC as he wasn't like that never said no before he met me 
. My eldest actually told me recently that he thinks PIL are pretty disrespectful to me.
AIBU to think that at some point DC stop wanting to sleep over at their GPs and I need to respect that? They also keep talking about taking DC on holiday abroad with them, but at our own expense. My DC don't want to go. Of course, that is my fault as usual. If I wasn't around DC and DH would do as they are told as do the rest of the men in the family.