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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Drivers waiting for a space in shopping centre car parks

133 replies

Lydiaatthebarre · 17/12/2018 14:00

Earlier today there was a queue of traffic backed out onto the main road from my local shopping centre car park - all caused by a driver sitting with his indicator on waiting for someone to unpack loads of shopping into the boot of her car, get two toddlers strapped in and leave the trolley back at a nearby bay.

AIBU to think that, yes, finding parking can be difficult at this time of year, but no, that doesn't mean that common sense and consideration for others (including the very stressed looking mother trying to get packed up and out of the space as quickly as possible because she was probably mortified at the hold up) goes out the window?

OP posts:

bumblenbean · 17/12/2018 20:44

The problem with the ‘one in one out’ system is that if it’s a huge carpark you could be driving around for ages desperately trying to find the one space, only for another car to be let in while you’re still looking, and then another .. Yes it means another space has become free somewhere - but where?! Def think the illuminated signs are the way forward.

On another note, where are all these odd people standing in spaces to reserve them?! I have never seen this!

BoomBoomsCousin · 17/12/2018 21:07

"where are all these odd people standing in spaces to reserve them?! I have never seen this!" in 50 years I've only seen this a handful of times, but it's always when parking is at its most fraught (which is, no doubt, why they've resorted to the tactic).

Biancadelriosback · 17/12/2018 21:29

The town I live in (up north) is notorious for bad parking. It is a small town but everyone drives in at weekends, especially at winter. I haven't gotten parked any Saturday or sunday since mid November. Literally all spaces are full from shops opening until after closing as they use the supermarket carpark and go around all the shops. Often, after the 3 hour window, they return to their car and move into a different carpark. Which makes it absolute hell when you need to nip in to grab some nappies/milk/bread etc. You cannot nip. It is impossible. I can only imagine the fury if people found out that some ignorant arseholes were doing this just to spite those who dare try to indicate that they would like to use that parking space when you've finished. Really don't understand some people.

HopeGarden · 17/12/2018 22:45

Oh, I’ve had that before! Driving in circles around a bloody car park for half an hour before getting parked because everyone else seemed to be finding the elusive empty space first.

bumblenbean · 17/12/2018 23:46

Exactly Hope! It’s a flawed system I tell you!! My local hospital operates this policy and it’s an absolute nightmare - not only does it take half an hour to get into the bloody carpark when it’s busy, you then have to spend an age racing the other drivers

DinoDave · 18/12/2018 00:01

It has been known for drivers in the car park to see people returning to their cars with shopping and ask them if they are leaving then follow them to the space

This is RULE ONE in the ‘finding a space in a rammed car park’ rule book.
You don’t look for a space, you look for someone walking away from the exits and stalk the fuck out of them.

I do it every time...actually I drive and I get the dc to do it...to find a person and call out instructions as to which way they’re walking. They’re a dab hand at it!

Changingeveryth · 18/12/2018 00:28

Have no problem with someone indicating for my space as long as they don't make turning difficult or block the most sensible route out of the car park. Most of the time they do this though so I am not going to try and hurry DC along for them. In the worst cases I don't have much choice but to wait as they have blocked me in or completely blocked my visibility.

Didsomeonesaybunny · 18/12/2018 00:30

Despise it too and actually find it pretty stressful.

Bababoo13 · 18/12/2018 00:35

Yes hate this. If people do this to me I get in the car make a phone call have a drink faff About abit And they generally get fed up and bugger off

MrsFezziwig · 18/12/2018 01:18

The obstructive types among you will be depressed to learn that last time we parked in a busy seaside car park, another driver not only signalled to us that he was leaving so we could have his space, but then gave us his pay & display ticket which had a few hours’ credit on it and refused to take any money for it.

Now he was totally letting the side down

Beaniebaby4 · 18/12/2018 02:18

If you’re off to one side and not blocking it’s fine. I try to not make people feel rushed if I’m waiting for a space and just have a chat or something and say take your time. I never feel pressured to leave when someone is waiting for me and being impatient, I find that’s the best time to have a snack and make sure you’ve got an excellent playlist ready. If someone is polite and asks nicely then I will hurry.
Did once have some come and knock on the window asking if we were leaving when I was sobbing in the car, she could 100% see that. DH was at the wheel at the time though so left promptly...

PyongyangKipperbang · 18/12/2018 03:29

Does anyone else wave thanks to the driver who "gave" you "their" space? I always do, if only to acknowledge that they must have felt a bit pressured knowing I was waiting.

Yerroblemom1923 · 18/12/2018 03:41

What about the people who just want to sit a while and eat their sandwich? E.g. on lunch break and know they won't have chance to sit down in staff room when they return to work.

freshfoodpeople · 18/12/2018 04:23

What really gets m goat is when you are waiting to get into a spot (not blocking traffic behind you) is that the person gets in their car, puts sunglasses on, puts seat belt on, adjusts mirror and seat?????? puts address into sat nav then pulls out like they have all day - just pull out of your space!

Sorry that people wanting to be safe by wearing their seat belts, making sure that the car is set up properly for them to drive (maybe they knocked the mirror getting into the car or someone else drove it into the car park originally so has different settings for the mirrors etc), or wanting correct directions for when they exit the car park holds you up for five seconds.

I wear prescription sunglasses. If I didn't put them when I first get into the car, there'd be bigger problems than having to wait a few seconds for me to exit the car spot.

redcarbluecar · 18/12/2018 05:16

I think it's a bit pathetic to go deliberately slowly if someone is patiently (and understandably) waiting for your space in a busy car park. If you aren't leaving straight away, surely it's possible to communicate this to the waiting driver so that they move on. If they're rude or impatient, that's perhaps a different matter (go-slow temptation somewhat stronger), although I'd probably still just want to get on with my day where possible rather than exacerbate delays just to make some point or other.

Sparklingbrook · 18/12/2018 06:42

My question still stands.

In that case having thought long and hard and as it's a hypothetical situation due to my shopping and parking habits anyway...

If they were polite I might tell them what floor I was parked on. But it would be hard to follow me as there's lots of one way bits. Plus I might worry that when I got to my car some other car spots me and starts waiting. What then?

BackBoiler · 18/12/2018 06:55

This is exactly why I am waiting until later this week to do all my shopping DH can battle with the car park and I can get out and make a start...he can ring me when he's found a space.

DGRossetti · 18/12/2018 06:57

gave us his pay & display ticket which had a few hours’ credit on it and refused to take any money for it.

If possible (some sneaky operators make you put your reg number on the ticket) I will do that (and have been on the receiving end too )

It's an interesting illustration of the price point at which consumers feel ripped off. (Especially in hospital P&D car parks where you are forced to overpay for parking).

BouleBaker · 18/12/2018 07:02

theymademejoin if you wait in a lane for a parking space to become available near me, the attendants will either move you on or ticket you. They are adamant it is not allowed.

HopeGarden · 18/12/2018 07:09

What about the people who just want to sit a while and eat their sandwich? E.g. on lunch break and know they won't have chance to sit down in staff room when they return to work.

If I want to do something like that , I generally sit in the passenger seat. That way it looks like I’m waiting for someone else , and not potentially about to leave, so people who are looking for a space right now tend to just carry on driving.

DeepanKrispanEven · 18/12/2018 07:23

If you're looking for parking, you're not paying attention to pedestrians. Much safer to pick a lane and wait for someone to come back to their car.

That would be insane - you could be waiting for half an hour or longer. And it's not necessarily safer, as you will be making everyone else drive round you.

DeepanKrispanEven · 18/12/2018 07:25

My colleague got called a cunt for sitting in his car for 10 minutes after arriving back at it, despite the fact he can't actually move his car for fifteen minutes after signing out of his call because of his job and tracker.

I'm intrigued. What job requires you to sit around for 15 minutes after signing out?

theymademejoin · 18/12/2018 10:05

@BouleBaker - if you wait in a lane for a parking space to become available near me, the attendants will either move you on or ticket you. They are adamant it is not allowed.

I guess it depends on the car park. The ones I do this in have wide lanes and are one-way only so you're causing much less of a problem than you would if you were driving around. Narrow lanes with 2 way traffic would be different.

@DeepanKrispanEven - That would be insane - you could be waiting for half an hour or longer. And it's not necessarily safer, as you will be making everyone else drive round you.

Nope. I've tried both methods. Picking a lane and waiting is much quicker.

If you're tucked in, you tend not to cause any difficulties to other traffic. Obviously, I'm basing this on the car parks I use so, as I said above, narrow lanes or 2-way traffic is different.

BouleBaker · 18/12/2018 10:25

Our car park is wide lanes and one way. Depends on the he individual rules I guess.

theymademejoin · 18/12/2018 11:29

@BouleBaker - then they're just mean 😁

One of our local car parks has an attendant like that. He sits in a cafe with binoculars to find people to clamp.

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