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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Drivers waiting for a space in shopping centre car parks

133 replies

Lydiaatthebarre · 17/12/2018 14:00

Earlier today there was a queue of traffic backed out onto the main road from my local shopping centre car park - all caused by a driver sitting with his indicator on waiting for someone to unpack loads of shopping into the boot of her car, get two toddlers strapped in and leave the trolley back at a nearby bay.

AIBU to think that, yes, finding parking can be difficult at this time of year, but no, that doesn't mean that common sense and consideration for others (including the very stressed looking mother trying to get packed up and out of the space as quickly as possible because she was probably mortified at the hold up) goes out the window?

OP posts:
notacooldad · 17/12/2018 17:27

Today 14:26 Katedotness1963

Because I’m an arsehole, if someone does this while I’m filling the boot, I close it and walk back into the shop. I hate feeling rushed*
Why act like a daft twat?
Car parking spaces at times are like gold dust. If the driver wanting your space sees you coming free and us waiting why is rhat a problem to you? If he was raving and horn blowing fair enough but your sirt of behaviour is just cock-ish and petty. Oh , sorry, you said why, because you are an areshole!!

5foot5 · 17/12/2018 17:29

What really gets m goat is when you are waiting to get into a spot (not blocking traffic behind you) is that the person gets in their car, puts sunglasses on, puts seat belt on, adjusts mirror and seat?????? puts address into sat nav then pulls out like they have all day - just pull out of your space!

What!! You expect people to pull out of their space without having fastened their seat belt, ensured they are in a safe driving position and can see out of their mirrors just because you don't want to wait another few seconds!

I suppose you think they should do all those things, including putting addresses in to the sat nav if necessary, while driving away. Yes that sounds really safe Hmm

DGRossetti · 17/12/2018 17:29

Given that I didnt assault anyone, didnt touch anyone, just refused to move my car that was legally parking and she KICKED my car, I still maintain I was in the right

I suggest you familiarise yourself with the courts definition of common assault ... you don't need to "touch" anyone. Just make them fear the use of violence.

BerylStreep · 17/12/2018 17:38

Well the other day I was driving into town, and saw a woman at a pay a display space with her boot open. She had a large dog with her.

I pulled alongside her, smiled, and said 'excuse me, are you coming or going?'

She smiled back and said 'Going'

To which I said brilliant, thank you, and put my indicator on and waited the thirty seconds it took for her to leave.

I really don't understand the angst that some folk have about another driver wanting to take their space when they leave. If the woman had then decided to unload her large dog and go back to the shops like some of the posters here, I would have been Confused

PyongyangKipperbang · 17/12/2018 18:11

RIght...ok

Thats why she ran off when security said they were calling the police after she damaged my car, and I didnt. Hmm

She was not in fear of violence, but I bloody well was. At no point was my car near enough to touch her until she decided to kick it. I started entering the space and refused to back out. I didnt drive at her, I didnt threaten her, I just refused to reverse.

But whatever.....

Thentherewascake · 17/12/2018 18:12

I wonder if these drivers do the same in a train, and willingly miss their stop to make sure standing passengers do not steal the seat they no longer need

PyongyangKipperbang · 17/12/2018 18:13

I should add that I hadnt even seen her until I started to park at which point I stopped and shook my head when she shouted it was her space. She started ranting and I shrugged my shoulders and continued to wait.

But yeah, fear of violence....right....FFS....

AdobeWanKenobi · 17/12/2018 18:23

Can I make a confession here?

I am a parking space catfisher.

I drive a small car, park well back and if I'm still faffing in the car I am endlessly amused by people who get excited and think the space is empty.
I am a twat.

GhostsInSnow · 17/12/2018 18:25

if you were driving towards her and near enough to touch her, that was more self-defence from her part

How the fuck would it be self defence when she could have just stepped to the side?! Bizarre.

CaptainBrickbeard · 17/12/2018 18:26

Did someone upthread actually object to people taking the time to fasten their seatbelts and set their satnav before starting to drive? WTF??

proudestofmums · 17/12/2018 18:29

We parked in Selfridges car park in Birmingham today. DH nd I returned to the car laden with bags. Car coming towards us naturally and reasonably thought it was their lucky day (well, obv. the driver did - I doubt if the car cared!) and pulled up to wait for us. So DH did the decent thing and went up to explain that we were waiting for the third person to arrive before we could go, so he didn’t think we were being awkward when we got in and didn’t move

confusedofengland · 17/12/2018 18:33

I had somebody beep her horn at me today, because she felt I wasn't vacating the space quick enough Shock She had been sitting there since she saw me walk up to my car, so as far as she knew I may just have been putting some shopping in the boot before continuing shopping. It actually made me go slower, so she gave up & drove off Grin

RedForShort · 17/12/2018 18:37

@Thentherewascake they have that system in the shopping centre near me. Doesn’t always work though, certain cars don’t register for some reason. Seems to be mostly the large cars oddly!

It’s mental at the moment, went past yesterday signs showing 11 spaces (of would some would be false displays). I think there’s a bit under 3,500 spaces supplied. Parking makes people so very stressed, yet there was still queues to get in.

3out · 17/12/2018 18:42

@Gettingbackonmyfeet this is so frustrating, I really need to understand what that woman was on about! What was her claim for rights to the space? We’ll never know 😩

Lifeofsmiley · 17/12/2018 19:01

Exactly dingdong, I’m scratching my head at some of the petty posts on here.
I’m the opposite,if I’m walking to my car and I see someone driving round looking for a space i’ll Give them a wave to let them know I’m leaving.
Manners really do cost nothing.

Lifeofsmiley · 17/12/2018 19:02

These are probably the same people who go slow on the road when someone wants to get past them

Biancadelriosback · 17/12/2018 19:02

This thread is frustrating. So many of the people on here would rather more cars driving around the carpark, making it more dangerous for people walking in or out of the supermarket, just so they can have a little power trip? Are you lives really that empty that you need to do that? Are you lacking control in other areas so take it out on random strangers. Grow the fuck up! Fair enough if someone is being an arse but if they are sat there with their indicator on (apparently this makes them a moron according to PP), it's probably because there aren't other spaces and they need something from the shop. Just like when DS had a nappy explosion and I needed to get into a changing facility to try and wash the shit out of his clothes and hair.

theymademejoin · 17/12/2018 19:16

So many of the people on here would rather more cars driving around the carpark, making it more dangerous for people walking in or out of the supermarket,

That is true. If you're looking for parking, you're not paying attention to pedestrians. Much safer to pick a lane and wait for someone to come back to their car.

tillytrotter1 · 17/12/2018 19:21

It makes me go slower!

I've been known to load the car then go back inside, just to annoy people like this! Why do they also have to sit in the middle so no-one can get past them to go and find another space?

Sparklingbrook · 17/12/2018 19:29

It has been known for drivers in the car park to see people returning to their cars with shopping and ask them if they are leaving then follow them to the space. Confused I would have to run between cars and lose them. Grin

TBF I really try not to go shopping when the car parks are rammed and it would mean I have to drive around looking for a space, or people would have to wait for me.
Same as I wouldn't enter a coffee shop with a mega long queue and hardly any free tables.

Biancadelriosback · 17/12/2018 19:53

Sparkling so rather than help someone out you would rather run off in a busy carpark and play hide and bloody seek?
Some people don't have a choice but to shop at busy times.

Sparklingbrook · 17/12/2018 19:58

Nobody has ever done it to me thank goodness Biancadelriosback. I wouldn't like being followed around a multi storey by a car particularly though. The space could be over the other side of the car park!

Biancadelriosback · 17/12/2018 20:01

My question still stands.

Kelsoooo · 17/12/2018 20:05

I park in car parks 32.5 times a week, minimum. I'm a dab hand at parking.

This last seven day period;

I have been screamed at for sitting in my car for longer than five minutes after to returning to it. Yup, because I was literally unable to drive due to pain and was desperately trying to work out who to call to help me.

I've had three women walk directly behind my car during the reversing into a bay process - despite them deciding to do so when I was already moving.

One woman, same time as above, walked behind my moving car (I stopped obviously) and then parked her trolly next to her passenger seat whilst she loaded her boot.....preventing me reversing into the space. I couldn't go forward because there were cars either side. Someone else shouted at her.

My colleague got called a cunt for sitting in his car for 10 minutes after arriving back at it, despite the fact he can't actually move his car for fifteen minutes after signing out of his call because of his job and tracker.

This was all during the week so not even Saturdays. I find people are generally twats in carparks.

One near me, causes traffic to back up onto a dual carriageway because people Insist on turning into the first bay of spaces, despite that meaning waiting for a break in the flow of traffic exiting the carpark....its fucking ridiculous.

I hate car parks.

WoodBurnerBabe · 17/12/2018 20:22

I work in a very new shopping centre that has the lights showing which spaces are free. I have staff parking so I don't use it, but on the odd occasion I've been in there they are pretty accurate. It's utterly manic at the moment, full from about 11am and is causing ridiculous jams on the approaches. There are signs for it out on the ring road saying when it's full and asking people to use the park and ride. Of which there are 5, with lots of busses.

I shop online as I can't stand the crowds, I'll occasionally pop out into the shops at lunchtime but it's a scary scary place out there at the moment...