Is it just my kids who haven't got onboard with the things you're supposed to do!

[mincefuckingpies]

They aren't interested in baking. (This is probably because I am shite at it.) So making gingerbread and cookies is out; they'd rather just buy some.

They cried at Santa

If I tried to snuggle up in a blanket and watch Christmas movies with them, I'd be kicked and punched to within an inch of my life and after half an hour they'd wander off.

AIBU to think it's all bollocks, but a few toys and have done with it

”I'd be kicked and punched to within an inch of my life and after half an hour they'd wander off.”
You need to parent them properly, I would hate one your kids to share a class with mine.

8ve never managed a movie with mine either! They always wander off too!
They are only interested in the gb house decoration so I buy the kits and rope them in for the last bit.

If I tried to snuggle up in a blanket and watch Christmas movies with them, I'd be kicked and punched to within an inch of my life

I can see "elbowed by squirmy, bored children" but "kicked and punched"? Either you're being way dramatic in an attempt at humour or something concerning is going on.

Jesus

Fucking Jesus.

Oh I'm sorry OP, was this a "hilarious" lighthearted thread?

Yes I agree that if they're physically violent you need to address this. If you're over exaggerating then the ages of the children may be a factor

Why would they punch you?

Is it too early for ?

@mincefuckingpies yes my son would've rather wrestled me than watched a film through. Baking was a no no and I too am crap at it but he was only ever interested in the finished product. Try and do something with them that they'd like (even if that means a WWE battle- dressed as Santa?!) lol

It wasn't supposed to be hilarious.
Mildly amusing. But now I feel really shit and embarrassed. As you were.

Well, that went well

My kids haven't got the hang of Christmas either, OP. I tried to get them to sing carols around the pianoforte with me, but they just attacked me with machetes and ran off covered in blood and laughing.

Tchoh...kids, eh?

I know dawn, I feel like enough of a dickhead, Ok? merry Christmas.

Did you really mean kick and punch?

Don’t feel shit and embarrassed, there is still time for this to be a mildly amusing, jovial chatty Fred.

I don’t understand why you think it’s funny that your children kick and punch you?

Op, have you thought about taking them on a naice spa day ?

Don't worry OP I get it. Kids don't tend to give a shit about making memories because they live in the moment. Something adults struggle with unless it involves colouring books and mindfulness apps.

Good plan to buy toys and sod the rest!

Your post made me laugh mincepies do not feel shit.
Some of us knew exactly what you meant without thinking you had spawned the Kray twins.

I think everyone knew what the op meant, they just wanted to have an opportunity to pile in .

How old are they OP?

Wow people are just crazy.. everyone knows very well what you meant. Jeezes!!!!!!

i feel you op. mine won't get on board with having fun either. we had some success with a hot glue gun, paint your own decorations and liberal applications of glitter and fake snow. then they argued about who was putting which decoration where on the tree

@mincefuckingpies bloody hell, people on here can be so rotten and seem to take pride in it because "that's mumsnet" and if you don't like it "pop over to netmums, hun!" It was totally clear that your OP was lighthearted so just ignore those who find it nice to belittle and humiliate. Merry Christmas!