Fuck off with your fucking balloons

[MaryofMislethwaiteManor]

Alright, hands up, I’m hungover to fuck from a big party last night (free bar and free food which no one was bloody well eating ) and I have to go to a two year old’s party later (I might eat a very rare burger for lunch to try and get out of that, as last time I did that the world fell out of my bottom )

But I’ve just seen on Facebook that they’re currently in the process of blowing up 500 FIVE HUNDRED balloons to fill the restaurant (yes, the two year old is having their party at 7pm in a restaurant )

WHY? WHY??? Why would you just willy nilly leave 500 balloons floating around to just remain in a horrid wrinkly plastic shape for the next 1000 years, or blow away and just hang on a tree, or smother a bloody I don’t know, marlin in the sea? Why????????? And why would you spend your day blowing up 500 balloons???

Arghhhhhh it’s going to be such a long day.

I hope you throw up in the Special Fried Rice, like anyone would notice

I can feel my eyes rolling out the back of my head. Still hope the Chinese food is nice.

Who the f**k has a party at 7pm with FUVE HUNDRED BALLOONS for a TWO year old ? Ludicrous.
Just make an excuse.

I suffer from Globophobia (fear of balloons) and anything else that's turgid and might go off in your face. I think the OP was having a delusional hungover moment. She hasn't returned.

I hate balloons, 500 balloons are my idea of a living hell, I couldn't go in case someone did something with them that made a screeching noise or made them go static. I would be in the corner crying. I hate polystyrene as well, I know I'm strange, I just can't deal with it

I'm not bothered about the rest of the post I'm too pissed off that you are all slagging off no bedtime. I never had a bed time and it never killed me. Different familes different rules 🤷‍♀️

Can’t stand this kind of wanton extravagant waste. Such a crap message to send to your kids too

This thread is a wind up isn't it?

500 balloons! Why, and what a waste and poor environment. Thankfully most parents have more sense.

2 year old party at 7 pm... at a restaurant …. lol

Just who are they trying so hard to impress because it cannot be the child.

Macbeth? Their kid is called Macbeth?
Fuck right off 😂😂😂😂

This comment cracked me up

I was able to take my son out at 7pm at the age of 2 why not! My son slotted into our lives not the other way around, the name is nothing and the mum exaggerated the amount of balllons she was blowing up plus they were probably biogradable

anything else that's turgid and might go off in your face

Snort

I would have declined any party invitation that was from someone called Macbeth at 7 pm, as that was my DCs bedtime at that age! What madness is this?
Why did you even accept?

@Ynci
Whereabouts were you when you met Horatio?

Macbeth is a great name! Loving this. Free sleeping my arse...

I honestly can't believe you people! What a bunch of bullies you all are. Mocking a child's name for starters and so what if they have hired a Chinese place for their child's birthday and using 500 balloons. I hope she sees this and uninvites you!

Does that make the mum Lady Macbeth?

Bit late in the day Linsey seeing as the party was last night

He probably has 'rage' because he's sleep deprived to fuck!

How did it go

What a poor wain being called macbeth 🙈😂

OP was probably lynched at the party by the balloon-obsessed weirdos for dissing their parenting choices on Mumsnet.

OP's just a walking shadow, a poor player, who struts and frets her hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more.

Why does it matter when he sleeps, he obviously doesnt have to wake up early as he doesnt go to school yet, he' ll just get up a little later.

I only got the email about this thread today