Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Facebook Posts about unable to pay for shopping so the lady behind paying...?

186 replies

WhatsUpHun · 14/12/2018 22:23

i keep seeing posts on FB saying things like

I was in SUPERMARKET around X yesterday eve and was at the scan and go check out ready to pay when I entered my pin incorrectly 3 times blocking my card. There was a lady next to me who saw what happened and asked if I was ok. I explained what had happened and without question she put her bank card into the machine and paid for my shopping. I told her I would transfer the money straight into her account and she said no and would not give me her details to do it. She said merry Christmas. And walked off. I would love to find this lady even if it’s just to show my appreciation as she didn’t have to do what she did. I am very grateful for what she did. There really are some amazing people around

but i cannot work out if this is some kind of spam? thats going around, and whats the point of it? (unless its trying to get people to be nicer to each other?)

OP posts:
SantaClauseMightWork · 15/12/2018 00:31

This thread has shown some true colours. I can write at least as many things as green. Nearly all of them would be from a time when I barely had money to have three square meals a day. A lot of you are so evil I wish I don’t come across the likes of you in my real life.

HildaZelda · 15/12/2018 00:31

If I have time left on my parking ticket, I always pass it on to someone, and have had the same done for me.
I didn't realise this was a big no-no? Confused

SantaClauseMightWork · 15/12/2018 00:33

When people don’t have a lot of money, that’s when they know the best how it is to have nothing at all.

SantaClauseMightWork · 15/12/2018 00:33

Hilda
Ignore this lot. I always do this. Why should’nt I? My money, my decision.

anitagreen · 15/12/2018 00:35

the ones that piss me off are the American ones of buying a homeless person a lottery ticket or scratch card then filming them scratching them off, and that annoying guy over here used to film himself giving homeless people food or drinks i think he's called Jack

ohwellinthatcasetryprunes · 15/12/2018 00:36

I bought something in a charity shop for 99p yesterday, and told the assistant to keep the 1p change.

Should I be putting this on Facebook?

ninjawarriorsocks · 15/12/2018 00:40

Yes I bought an old lady a loaf of bread in the shop a few weeks ago as she didn’t have enough money on her. I didn’t post about it on Facebook though.....

I think lots of people do this kind of thing, but only some people boast about it on FB.

HildaZelda · 15/12/2018 00:44

@SantaClause, thanks. I honestly can't see the problem with it.

Itsyersel · 15/12/2018 00:44

@GreenKangaroo

This week:

The man opposite me on the train paid for a teenager who had no money.

I bought a theatre programme for a student whose card wouldn't work.

I used my debit cards for the bus fares for a family who only had 1 card

I gave a stranger £185 (all I had on me) as there need was greater than mine.

I believe that people pay for shopping.

Coming up on tonights episode of "Things that didn't happen"

JudasPrudy · 15/12/2018 00:45

@riviana yes it's a thing and it's shit. As if people living rough don't suffer from a lack of privacy as it is, to then be plastered over social media.

SimplySteve · 15/12/2018 00:50

I'm very cynical but have seen random acts of kindness, and indeed done several myself. However, I do get amused at the people who slather what they've done all over social media looking for kudos.

Except a hugely inspirational woman who detailed her journey of altruistically donating a kidney. So inspirational many of us are now waiting on a phone call.

Augusta2012 · 15/12/2018 00:50

Usually they’re those shitty viral things where if you like them you get some formulaic message of the poster saying ‘Ah, you didn’t know but this is a test to see who is an angel in disguise and you passed it. Now you have to do a random act of kindness tomorrow and repost the same message on your wall and send this message to anyone who like it. The you will be blessed by the angels and have good news soon and unicorns will fly out of your butt. Don’t forget to thank the angels!”

Eg, it’s bullshit.

Theimpossiblegirl · 15/12/2018 00:52

It's good to be kind but if you're posting about it on FB or worse, YouTube, your motives may be more about yourself than the person you are helping.

Facebook Posts about unable to pay for shopping so the lady behind paying...?
BeanTownNancy · 15/12/2018 01:03

When they are anonymous I think "that's probably fake" but still hope that the message of being kind to each other might get out there and positively influence people.
When it's a "look at me, I'm so great and you should all try and be just like me" post I get annoyed.

I try to do my bit for random people, I volunteer for and donate to charities, I just don't feel the need to publicly virtue signal. It's not a competition.

Linziepie · 15/12/2018 01:08

This week at the hospital car park my dad went to pay for parking. He always has the correct money ready but this week he had gone over the four hours it normally takes but hr hadn't realised this so didn't understand why it wouldn't work. The guy behind went to help him and put it on his card for him and wouldn't take any money for it. It cost £8.20.

CherryPavlova · 15/12/2018 01:09

I’m sure most reasonable people have at some point done similar. Whether that be 20p for car parking or a bus ticket for a teenager. What most reasonable people don’t do is sing and dance about it.

A better message to share than hatred and pro-Trump messages though.

SleepingStandingUp · 15/12/2018 01:11

I have my bus ticket to a teenager, I want a gold star too

ABoozedMoose · 15/12/2018 01:17

I always do the parking ticket thing, mainly because parking is so expensive round here that I'd feel guilty not passing it on.

I did actually have somebody offer to help with my shopping the other day. I'd scanned 3 things at the self checkout and realised, as I was chucking my coins into the machine, that I had misremembered how much I had. One of the things was a bar of chocolate and the other two were some pasta and some tomatoes. I asked the assistant if I could put the chocolate back and explained why and the lovely bloke next to me offered to pay. I thanked him but declined a) I didn't need chocolate and b) could have paid by card if I had actually needed to. Was really grateful that a stranger would be so kind though.

ThistleAmore · 15/12/2018 01:19

I think the vast majority of people are nice and do nice things, not for applause, but because they're just nice, decent human beings.

I've done nice things and I've had nice things done for me in return, but even though I'm a dyed-in-the-wool agnostic these days, my religious upbringing taught me that 'the right hand should not know what the left is doing' when it comes to acts of charity: you don't flaunt them, because then it's not charity or selfless giving, it's an act of egoism.

If I do something nice and not tell anybody about it, it will still be a thing.

GunpowderGelatine · 15/12/2018 01:36

The other week my DH went to the petrol station and in front of him in the queue was an elderly man in a black suit asking the cashier where he crematorium was. Him and his family were attending a funeral in 20 minutes, weren't from the area and were lost. The cashier tried to explain the way but actually they were on completely the wrong side of town. The man said ok he'd try googling it.

DH was due to come home to take me out for lunch, we lived in the opposite direction to the crematorium but he said to the guy that 20 minutes is cutting it fine, and he'll happily lead the way in his car if they follow. It was a good 8 miles out the way in the wrong direction but it meant they made it in time and were very grateful.

Do you know who DH told? No one - well Just me, and only because he was gonna be late for our lunch. No Facebook status, no tweeting, no #RAOK on any social media. I was very proud of him and pleased that, unlike everyone else I seem to know, he didn't want glory for his good deed.

Now if you asked an acquaintance or someone who doesn't know him well "What's Mr Gelatine like?" They'd probably say he was quiet and a bit grumpy and miserable looking. He has no interest in countering this Grin

LoudJazzHands · 15/12/2018 01:37

Wasn't there a thread on here called "good deeds you've done" or similar? Sounds like a good place to go and tell everyone how good you are.

User12879923378 · 15/12/2018 01:43

I can't remember how much it was now but I topped up a lady's shopping bill for her - she was in front of me at the till, she had small child with her and she was trying to work out what to put back to get it down to what she could afford. I didn't boast about it in FB but it did happen.

Atleastihavethecat · 15/12/2018 01:55

Dd and I were buying a father's Day gift for her to give to do (her step dad). It was about £3, so not hugely expensive. The cashier wouldn't take a £20, so I said I'd have to go into the shop next door to get change, and would she keep it at the till as it was the last one left. She said no. The guy two people behind me paid for it. It was a lovely gesture and meant a lot to DD. I said I'd go get the change for him, but he'd left when I went back to look for him.

Fortunately I think there are just some nice caring people in the world. Although I don't think it all needs to go on Facebook.

slappinthebass · 15/12/2018 02:05

Whilst I really hate and cringe at these posts, it was probably the RAOK movement on social media that inspired me to actually do small things for strangers. Or maybe it's the rise in homelessness and deprivation in recent years so the needs of others is more obvious? Hmm But I don't go a week without buying something or giving money to a stranger (I work part time on minimum wage so I don't have a lot of spare cash) and I never tell anyone, very occasionally to DH in conversation but he never seems particularly interested. I think it's good to inspire people but not to be smug, maybe we should all make an effort to share RAOK we've witnessed or received (rather than done ourselves).

But here's one of mine just because it's anonymous, I want to share because it was such a small thing I gave but was appreciated so much. A couple of days ago I was paying for a biggish food shop in a supermarket, and I noticed the man behind me counting out his loose change for his packet of sausage rolls over and over again. I asked if I could buy them for him and he just frowned at me, so I wondered if I'd offended him. I asked him again and he shrugged. The cashier put them through and when he tried to pay it took a moment for him to understand (turns out he didn't speak much English) and I don't think I'll ever forget the look on his face the moment the penny dropped. For something like a quid, the gratitude on this mans face was worth ten times over. He shook my hand, gave me a hug, knelt down on the floor to talk to my toddler in his pushchair and told me with tears in his eyes how his little girl lived in Spain and we had a broken conversation for a good while. For such a small RAOK I'll never forget his gratitude.

SimplySteve · 15/12/2018 02:32

I was at A&E recently, was on my own and use a wheelchair. I had excruciating abdominal pain, amongst other things. Woman with a young child saw me struggling to get wheelchair out of the boot. Not only did she grab the wheelchair out for me, she pushed me to reception, waited with me until triage and pushed me in. Meant so much to me.

Swipe left for the next trending thread