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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want a jacket from the 1990s? Who's BU?

120 replies

Notinterested19 · 07/12/2018 11:41

Just that really. MIL is a hoarder and has still kept most of DHs stuff from his childhood. She bought round a leather jacket that he wore in 1999 when he was 9 years old, we're both 28 and have a DS who's 6, DH and MIL insist we keep it til DS can fit it. She's also a smoker, and smokes in her house so anything she brings round reeks of smoke. I don't want it, AIBU? I don't mind toys, but clothes really? From the 90s?

OP posts:
RoboticMary · 07/12/2018 11:44

I’d smile, thank her graciously, and put it in the bin. Then you’re both happy!

ApolloandDaphne · 07/12/2018 11:45

Bin it. Job done. Clearing her hoard one item at a time!

thenightsky · 07/12/2018 11:45

Bin.

Floralhousecoat · 07/12/2018 11:47

They both sound like hoarders. The only thing worse than a boarder is a hoarder who insists you take their hoarded crap. As if their hoard is any way your responsibility.

Just say no op. It sounds so gross. I don't know any parent who would want to put their child in decade old clothing. How can your dh not see that?

Screaminginsidemeagain · 07/12/2018 11:49

We had the same with MIL. Everything smelt like smoke - nothing would get the stench out. Smile and get rid at the first chance you have

Avrannakern · 07/12/2018 11:49

Is the jacket in good condition? A leather jacket can be from the 90s but not look dated; depends on the style.

If it's in good condition, and doesn't look old and dated then why bin it? Repurpose, recycle, reuse. Don't child stuff out just cos it's old. What matters is if it's still functional. And you can clean it so the smoke thing doesn't matter.

Floralhousecoat · 07/12/2018 11:50

Don't take it and bin it op!!! You will be asked about the jacket every time you see her. And it won't be the last time she'll be giving you her musty old stuff if you accept the jacket. Just say no. Let her take responsibility for her own stuff.

Floralhousecoat · 07/12/2018 11:50

*responsibility for getting rid of her own stuff

OutragedERIC · 07/12/2018 11:56

The trouble with accepting it then binning is that the MIL won’t get the message and might keep doing it.

Best to give it back with a firm ‘thank you but I don’t think he’ll want it. By all means keep hold of it yourself though’

Ifailed · 07/12/2018 11:58

ask her to bring it round when your DS is 9, and ask him.

Fairenuff · 07/12/2018 12:07

You have to be blunt. "I don't want it. If you insist on giving it to me I will bin it". They will be outraged and take it home again.

diddl · 07/12/2018 12:10

If your husband wants to keep it then he can store it in his wardrobe.

You need to put up a pic of it!

notacooldad · 07/12/2018 12:15

It's annoying when people dump stuff on you. DP tends to have a chuck out about every 6 months. Everything is up for grabs to who ever wants it. If friends or colleagues want stuff we take it. Some days my work place is like swop shop with so much stuff about. After that it's the charity shop.
However everything is washed and pressed. I wouldn't be impressed with something smelling of smoke though.

With your MIL it would be a thanks but no thanks!

Lynne45 · 07/12/2018 12:15

What’s it like? A 90s leather jacket might look cool! You could have it cleaned if it smells.
Will your DS like it?
If not, you could at least pass it on to a vintage shop.

Lweji · 07/12/2018 12:18

Is it in a good condition? Does it reek of smoke or could you clean it?
Is it a fairly classical shape?

I don't see the problem. Better use it for DS than throw it away.

Or accept it and donate it discreetly.

diddl · 07/12/2018 12:18

" you could at least pass it on to a vintage shop."

If it's not wanted at all then MIL should take it back/donate/pass it on elsewhere herself-not push the work onto someone else to do.

adaline · 07/12/2018 12:20

I wouldn't bin it, it's probably in decent condition and leather is still a popular look. If it smells can you not just wash it?

Jenny17 · 07/12/2018 12:20

Or donate to charity and tell mil it's gone to charity.

Thesnobbymiddleclassone · 07/12/2018 12:20

Smile, say thanks and chuck it in the bag for the charity shop!

diddl · 07/12/2018 12:20

"If it smells can you not just wash it?"

It's a leather jacket.

Tighnabruaich · 07/12/2018 12:22

MIL is having a bit of a clear out. She phoned to see if we'd like DH's school reports from all through Primary School. Er, no, thanks, don't want your old hoarded clutter!

Avrannakern · 07/12/2018 12:22

@diddl

You wash a leather jacket with warm water and soap or water and vinegar. Then wipe with a clean cloth to remove any residue. It's perfectly possibly to wash a leather jacket.

adaline · 07/12/2018 12:22

It's a leather jacket.

It can still be put in the washing machine! Just on a gentle cold cycle and treated afterwards.

Workreturner · 07/12/2018 12:22

No one is being unreasonable

Either she keeps it
Or you say you’ll store it in loft and then charity it

Fairenuff · 07/12/2018 12:22

I think by 'bin it' most people mean donate don't they? No one puts much in the bin these days.

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