to wonder how people afford to decorate their houses?

[Blelibo]

Me and DH both in late 20s, both on 30k a year, own our own house, we have one child together and DH has a daughter from previous relationship... we hang NO money to decorate our house with. We've lived here a year and it's completely empty!!

Anyone else in same boat?

Why is saving for child care so bad? It costs a fortune! (If you work)

Wtaf is wrong with this? Please someone explain how responsibly paying for your nursery fees is now second to getting glitter wallpaper?

I'm disabled, don't work & I'm a single mum. I had to start again when I got divorced, my ex got the majority of our furniture, I just got the things that my parents had paid for, none of the big stuff like sofas, dining tables or beds & had to buy white goods as well. I hadn't a massive budget to get everything done, I found someone who painted houses for beer money, he painted a 2 bed semi in 3 days from top to bottom, I got trade paint from B & Q for most of the house & just colours for a feature wall in my bedroom, DS room was a bright colour & some reduced sky blue for the bathroom. I spent less than £150 on paint & rollers etc. I got my carpets & cushionfloor by ringing round all the local carpet shops & asking for an all in price for the whole house, the same carpet right through & cushionfloor for the bathroom & kitchen, I managed to get it all done including fitting for £900. I bought my curtains from a Next clearance shop, less than £150 for 4 pairs, my parents helped me buy the bigger stuff, I got a leather 3+2 sofa set, a dining table & chairs, a bedstead & mattress & a single bed all from a warehouse that sold end of lines from big stores like DFS, the sofas were Lazy Boy & I got everything for what I would have paid in the shops for them. I bought all my bedding from Next clearance, TK Maxx & supermarkets. Once I had the basics, I started every week buying something, I found lovely things in B & M, Matalan, The Range, I taught myself to assemble flat pack & found Argos, Ikea & other brands for a fraction of their price on sale pages on Facebook, very often the boxes were damaged but the stuff inside was ok. You get there in the end, I'm just getting ready to do it all again, I'm hopefully moving to a new home & want to replace some of my furniture with differently styled bits. I'm already scouring sale sites & saving for the January sales.

do you have many family or friends.often asking round especially round big events like crimbo many people can be or have family themselves who are getting rid of furniture.
have you checked local fb pages or I tell you what if you have enough time on your hands a good time on gumtree can come up with some brilliabt things.as there are the odd people getting rid of perfect stuff but just cant be bothered to tip or cant for someother reason so are just wanting to hand over goods.
car boots or charity shops.
what about making a fund or xmas list this year from family and friends saying your looking to furnish and decorate so they can either help with the buying or give money or vouchers.
my friend was living on barely anything and had only had a matress.she got herself some old palets and made both a bed and shelving out of them.
its amazing what a bit of paint and pinterest can do.
she could only too afford sample pots of paint so just added splashes of colours in cirlces,sqaures or stripes.
people only post,talk boast when they have a lovely place.but think of how many people there are in the world.then think how many are actually not posting.
try and make it the best it can but don't get down.
if you can keep it tidy.calm.homely because of you lot in it you will feel a whole lot better.and lots of that has to come from within too.
and also get ready to scour the shelves in the new year in the sales.
things like fairy lights.or throws or cushions going in sale might make a nice difference.

nat6999 you've done amazing well done you!

Why are you paying nursery fees if you're on maternity leave?

YABU
I was on social benefits when i first moved into my flat at 19 and still managed to save to decorate it

I am amazed that people can afford to change their decor so often, when my parents did it so rarely. 60k is a lot of money, so guess you may have a large house of mortgage. I am on a almost zero budget but have bought new things cheap on ebay and fb market place is great for people giving things away. I think you need a few interior design books on doing things cheap for inspiration. I have painted all furniture to match and painted walls can look better than paper. Fabric is expensive, so I have made things from old bedding. My friends think everything looks expensive and I have done jobs for them. I know I have an advantage, as I can sew and have a fine art background but you will learn and make everything how you like it
.

It all takes time

Save up to do one room at a time

We bought our first home 7 years ago and we just save up till we can afford to do a room

We haven’t done all the rooms yet but we are getting there

When we bought the house we were given a dining table. It wasn’t our style but we said it would just get us through the first st year till we could afford it. 7 years later we still have it as we’ve had other priorties instead

Well, she certainly didn't engage with all the posters talking about buying secondhand, using Freecycle, just starting with cast-offs and replacing with better items as money allows. She just posted defending her position and moaning that people were being nasty. No acknowledgement to the majority of posters who took time to tell her what they had done, which I find quite rude.

I also don't believe that they can't afford to buy a tin of paint to get started.

Actually a bit scared to comment on this thread again!

I am very grateful to those who commented with kind advice. I'm definitely going to check out freecycle (which I didn't know existed) and the other websites when I have a chance. Colicky 6 week old means I abandon most tasks which take more than 15 minutes!

When I said my house is empty, I don't mean it is a shell. We have sofas, and beds, and of course the essentials. It was just a turn of phrase and I didn't think would be taken literally. We've had a few things second hand so never implied I was averse to that...

I do have to ask though Motoko, can you please quote where I said I didn't want second hand (never heard of Farrow & Ball), and that I don't want to 'slum it'?

Again folks I'm really sorry I offended, 'flounced' (because I was getting pretty nasty responses) and have been a petulant stealth boaster who was irresponsible to have children before I had my 'house in check'!

I guess I'm not allowed to leave now as that would mean flouncing again, so I guess I'll stick around for some more responses....

Glad you've come back, and hope you feel a bit better and more positive now

You've made very different choices to many people; you have a good income but have bought your "forever" house before having your family, whereas many others will start small and up-size when they can afford it.

You can see why you don't have the spare money to spend on sprucing up your home, but you've had some good advice on here re freecycle etc so hopefully now you can make some inroads. Sales and offers in DIY shops can get you some great bargains, especially things like end of line paint colours or even slightly damaged tins if you are brave! Try charity shops for nice soft furnishings, and if you are creative you can make something lovely and more personal.

If you haven't already, do try to find somebody to talk to about your PND; I hid mine for a couple of years and when I finally admitted it to our lovely GP he was fantastic and really supportive.

Ach, don't be bothered by what randoms write,

Bottom line is your op said you're on 60k a year and live in an empty house, said you couldn't afford to furnish it and haven't been able to for a year and didn't know how people could on basically four grand a month. So of course people reacted.

However now you've explained you've a big mortgage, you have child maintenance payments, debt, and are saving towards nursery, are on statutory maternity pay so then clearly that's why you can't afford to do much in your home.

Furnishings and decorating a home is expensive, and when you get some breathing space, you just have to put money by.

In the meantime there is other solutions, second hand from charity shops or freecycle being one of them. A tin of paint doesn't have to be expensive and painting a room is easy. You'll get there.

OP - i think people are just a bit taken aback by your question as it's a very simple answer - you've made different choices - you have 2 children between you - which like it or not, are a huge luxury.

You are extremely fortunate to have been able to buy a house young (many 10 years older than you haven't managed this yet), you've taken a career development loan, you're on maternity etc etc

The simple answer is that you don't have cash to spend doing your house up as you've spent it on other things.

Posters also get jaded with melodramatic posts - ie "we've lived here a year and it's completely empty" - it's a daft thing to say when clearly that's not the case.

What is it that you are missing if you have the basic furniture you need?

It's taken us 4yrs to make inroads on furnishing our house and we've had to do a bit at a time, mostly Ikea stuff.

Some tips...

• Where you can, buy to last into the future. We didn't buy baby furniture but bought plain white Ikea Stuva and it's lasted 6+ years and still going strong. Suitable for babies right through to teenagers. We also bought the conversion kit for our kids bunk beds when we bought them, so we can make a high sleeper and single bed in the future. Was slightly more initial outlay but we're sorted until they leave home

• Paint match expensive brands. We used a Johnstones Centre to colour match Farrow & Ball.

• Don't expect to do a whole room in one go. Prioritise what you really need. You can always use something secondhand/free in the short term and replace as you can.

• Consider up-cycling furniture. Lots can be sanded, primed and repainted. Check out Pinterest for ideas on how to make the best of what you have or what you can get cheaply.

• Take measurements of furniture you're looking for so if you see something when out and about, you have all the details to know if it will fit. Helped us when spotting a bargain.

I do have to ask though Motoko, can you please quote where I said I didn't want second hand (never heard of Farrow & Ball), and that I don't want to 'slum it'?

You didn't, and I didn't say you did, but you gave that impression to me, because you didn't respond to the many posts about getting things secondhand.
You also made it sound like you had barely anything in the house. Now that you've explained further, we can tailor our suggestions.

I'm glad you've come back, and I'm sorry you're suffering from PND, I hope you'll feel better soon.

As you can see from the replies, it takes time to make your house a home, gradually building up. In time, you'll find you've accumulated a ton of stuff and could probably do with some decluttering!

Freecycle and Freegle are sites where people offer items for free, that still have life in them. It stops things going to landfill. We've had lots of things from there, and offered lots too. We got a tabletop dishwasher, and a set of chapel chairs, as examples. We offered the kitchen units that we ripped out when we moved in, and the guy who collected them, also took an old carpet we were going to take to the tip because it was so manky, to put on his allotment!

So, what specifically would you like ideas for? I'm sure there will be people on this thread who have done whatever it is, or know how to, and we can give you ideas on how to make your house a home.

I do agree with @TheViceOfReason though. You have spent your money on other things. You've bought a house with a big mortgage, when most people buy small, sell and repeat. You've had a baby, are on maternity leave, have prioritised your career with a development loan. None of these are bad things, but they are all choices.

DH and I need to do some work on our house, we've also spent our money on other things... a new car. It's a choice we made for lots of reasons (no doubt similar to you) but the fact is we have less money because of it.

Sadly you can't quite have everything although lots of us would like to have enough money to do what we want, when we want.

Debt, shopping cheap places like b&m rather than barker and stonehouse and taking second hand stuff from people or scouring gumtree.

Decorating the house around the things we already have e.g. we just moved to a new build. Had a chocolate brown sofa we cant afford to replace yet so we have worked our colour scheme around this.

You can get loads of free furniture from Freecycle, you just need to hire a van or something to collect it in. I think lots of people are clearing out when they move or go travelling so there's always loads of sofas and stuff on there. I think there's also schemes where you can get cheap paint; people donate their half used tins or something so you can collect a few but you'd need to look it up. Otherwise I always think a place looks nice if its clean and clutter free and has a few framed art pictures or nice photos on the walls. It doesn't have to cost a fortune.

I bought what I think might be our first brand new price of furniture since DH and I moved in together 6 years ago yesterday. Everything we have is either from a charity shop, eBay, a couple of secondhand shops locally, a hand-me-down or the village garage sale! None of it looks cheap or nasty though, it's all solid wood-type stuff - the cheapest looking thing is the new bit I got yesterday (a Kallax knock-off for DSs bedroom).

The British Heart Foundation have secondhand furniture outlets, our sofa was from there. Worth a look to see if there's one near you. And look out for house clearance type places - if you are near to or in Norfolk I can recommend a great place, which I love poking around.

Get a bit at a time and don't be insistent on having everything brand new, and it's totally doable.

Also, we went into Photobox and ordered large prints of some of our favourite pictures - places we've been to and things. If you have a decent res picture, they can look really good in a frame - relatively cheap to get from places like Wilko.

When I first moved into my unfurnished flat 35 years ago I had not a stick to my name. I slept on a second-hand mattress on the floor until I could afford to buy a bed on finance. Ditto a washing-machine. All these years later I still haven't replaced that second-hand cooker. Must get onto that as it's on its very last legs now. And the place still isn't fully carpeted.

Furnishing a home from scratch is very, very expensive. Thank goodness for other people's cast-offs!

I have to be honest op.

I don't really get your posts.

You know you have limited spare money because you made those choices. The choices aren't wrong. But they are your choices.

You are happy to have second hand

You do have stuff in your house

What's the actual issue? I really don't mean that in an arsey way.

But you do know why people can afford to decorate.

Glad to see your lost post OP.

Yeah it’s hard when you’ve got a small baby as money suddenly decreases and it gets challenging at times.

I remember really really wanting a garden table and chairs several years ago...just as we had the money a huge bill came in for someth8ng else. I can remember posting on here at the time bemoaning this. As someone pointed out though...at least we had the money aside for the big bill. It’s frustrating in the moment though.

We decorate within our means..gradually.
Cost us less than 50 to do the daughers room. It is a big room. Bit of paint and a roll or 2 of wallpaper. Looks nice kids happy..all the finishing touches have been done gradually, or the kids have bought stuff with pocket money.
My partner barely earns 15k in a year. And we manage to do it, few less nights out and it can be done on a budget.

really - nothing the op said was remotely offensive

and nothing that has been said by other posters has been offensive either.

I am one of those who said that it was clear that OP and her dh had made some choices that were clearly eating up £££ from a very healthy family income. Of course they aren't "wrong" or "irresponsible" choices (in fact, IMVHO, some of them - like buying biggest house you could afford - are great choices, and some of them - like saving in advance for Nursery fees when you are without one of your incomes - are a bit odd, but that is just my opinion). What people have been saying however, is that at the moment you don't have much money to decorate, because of the choices you have made.
I was also one of the people who assumed - again, from what OP posted - that she meant she had rooms in the house that were un-live-able-in , paper hanging off walls, no furniture etc., and said there would be ways to buy a can of paint if they made different choices.

The issues has been, until today's post, the OP has been unwilling to engage with people who've taken the trouble to reply.

Glad you've now come back OP.