To think it's rude to critique somebodies chosen baby name?

[Mothership241]

Expecting a little girl next year and have chosen a name that me and DP love. It's not an unusual or unpleasant name so I've taken offence to a family member constantly expressing their dislike of it whenever they see me and suggesting names that they think sound nicer.

The name we've chosen is Evelynn-Grace.

AIBU to think they're being rude and a babies name choice is nothing to do with anybody apart from it's parents, or am I just being hyper sensitive?

I like Evelyn Grace a lot. Evelynn-Grace not at all!

this completely.

I really don't get why you'd deliberately spell a child's name wrong. It's going to make everyone she ever meets think her parents couldn't spell. Every child is different anyway - you could call her Jane Smith and she would still be unique.

As for your cousin thinking it's old fashioned, that's good as 'old fashioned' names are really trendy at the moment. I'm waiting for Barbara and Brenda to come back round...

The Yooneek spelling and the hyphen would put people off regardless of the chosen name. Perhaps they’re trying to save your child a lifetime of negative assumptions and hassle?

Being 100% honest, the extra n and the hyphen make it sound very chavvy to me. Sorry!

Evelyn as a first name and Grace as a middle name is just lovely. Not old fashioned at all. Evie is also a gorgeous nickname. Glad you and DP have seemingly settled on it- it’s a beautiful name!

Yep.
Evelyn Grace is lovely. Evelynn (spelt wrong and even my spellcheck tried to correct it)-Grace is not lovely.
Hyphens used in a name like this do have certain connotations.

Lovely classic name - and I agree with other posters that would look better without the hyphen. I don't think the 'nn' spelling is that 'out' there - a bit like the difference between Sara or Sarah. Though the 'nn' seems like an Americanised version.

Also agree that it's rude for people to criticise the name when you're telling them the name you've chosen rather than asking for suggestions. I'd only mention reservations if it was something that I thought might get the child bullied in future (i.e. Princess or Pilot Inspektor).

Names have a great deal of class connotation, so in a place like the UK where class is definitely "a thing", you're going to get comments.

Hyphenated first names and non standard spellings are, along with giving a nickname as a first name (e.g. naming a child Maggie on her birth cert, rather than Margaret), regardless of the morality of the thing, currently considered markers for being uneducated.

E.g., that you don't know how to spell names, or haven't read widely enough to know that Jack is a nickname for John or Jacob, that sort of thing.

It's not nice but it's a reality.

It is pretty rude to comment on a name in general, but at the same time, rude comments can be a good source of information about the nasty things that people may be thinking but not often saying out loud.

TruffleShuffles I also had a Great Aunt Evelyn whose name was pronounced Evlyn, or Aunty Ev as she was mostly called.

The Evelyn Grace Academy is a secondary school in Brixton. So as long as you don't live too near that......

YANBU, It's a perfectly normal name so whether they personally happen to like it or not they should smile and be polite.

The only time I thought a baby name was receiving justified criticism was a woman I know who genuinely considered "Jezebel" for their girl.

@AamdC do you insist on being called the full "Sarah-Jane"?

That's my objection to hyphenated names, obviously for official documents or similar you'd need to say Sarah-Jane, but so often people with hyphenated names are very precious about their names in a way people with unhyphenated names are not e.g. friend called Catherine, known as Cat/Cath/ Cathy, friend called Catherine-May always insists on being Catherine-May.

I don't understand why there being a hyphen magically means the name must never be shortened.

Anyway my little bug-bear aside.

Evelyn Grace - very pretty! (And your cousin's not only being rude, she's also wrong - Evelyn is popular currently - it was number 27 for baby girls in England/ Wales in 2017)

Everyone hated DS1 make 21 years ago as it was “unusual”. Now it’s quite popular and “cool”.

Ignore, it’s gorgeous and she’s your baby.

Agree there's no need for the double N. We are all unique individuals anyway, your DD doesn't need an incorrect spelling to set her apart (and it is incorrect, not "different". If you truly want to be different choose a genuinely unusual name!

Would have taken my cousins critiquing much better had it been put across as it has here, as opposed to being told Evelyn is far too old fashioned for a baby confused

It's not to my personal tastes but it's a perfectly 'respectable' name and sure knocks a lot of today's a la mode names into a cocked hat.

But she's probably going to be called Evie by people anyway.

You aren't revealing the piece of information about the extraneous 'n' and the '-' when people ask you what she's to be called, are you? I agree with the PP about rethinking those elements anyway.

Evelyn Grace Surname it is!

Didn't know of the Evelyn Grace Academy in Brixton! Luckily we're the other side of London so doubt anybody will realise the coincidence

friend called Catherine-May always insists on being Catherine-May.

MaRy Catherine (with or without hyphen) trips nicely off the tongue but Catherine-May is tongue/mindboggling.

Evelyn Grace is a beautiful name. As a teacher, I would have (privately) rolled my eyes on seeing Evelynn-Grace on my register though.

Hi name please. Yes it's Evelynn with 2 N's..... NOT that difficult

Except that's not how it usually works, is it?

Most people don't say 'name please!'

They just spell your name incorrectly on anything and everything. And the assumption will always be that it's spelt Evelyn.

I say this as someone who's name can legitimately be spelt at least three ways (Anglo, Spanish and French - all of which are in common usage). Hardly anyone lands on the correct one (for me).

Good grief, OP, you aren't supposed to take everyone's points on board and come back to say you've changed the spelling.

That's far too reasonable.

Good grief, OP, you aren't supposed to take everyone's points on board and come back to say you've changed the spelling.

That's far too reasonable.

Eevalyn-Graayse it is then.

@Grauniad

I'm completely set on the name so wouldn't listen to suggestions of alternative names but in hindsight do think that my initial spelling was less aesthetically pleasing if nothing else.

Evelyn Grace Surname definitely looks better than Evelynn-Grace surname

Evelyn Grace is beautiful. I don't think Evelyn is old-fashioned - not in the way Dilys or Doreen etc is...(sorry if I have offended anyone).

I had Olivia Grace lined up but had a boy!

I really don't like hyphenated names or unnecessary extra letters. However, this is your baby so up to you!

Like PPs I absolutely love the name Evelyn!

Pronunciation-wise I always learnt it as Eeve-lyn for a man (as in Waugh) and Ev-lyn for a woman. Not sure if that rule has relaxed since though.

Lovely name! My DD is currently expecting a girl and she has told me the name they have chosen. I really don't like it and hope that they will have a change of heart before she arrives but I would never dream of saying so as it is none of my business.

Evelyn (pronounced eh Veh Lyn) is very classic and beautiful. It doesn’t need a unique spelling or another name tacked on the back.

My dad had a badly spelled name due to my grandfather not being able to spell. His name is very old it’s even in the bible. Think Robbert with 2 b’s (not his actual name) everytime he gave his name ‘Robert with 2 b’s...)