To encourage you all to buy less this Christmas?

[Notcontent]

Reading some of the Christmas threads, it seems there are so many people who are spending hundreds or thousands of pounds on Christmas presents, often spending money they don’t have or can ill afford.

This is madness. Buy only for the immediate family. Don’t buy lots. Don’t buy things just for the sake of buying.

I'm with you @Notcontent. I've only just got back into a job after no paid work since September so it's a lean Christmas here! Myself, my parents and sister have all said we are buying token gifts, no big presents. I've said the same to the kids - not to expect piles of gifts!

My 9yo DD said it doesn't matter about presents. It should be about the joy. Melted my little heart.

Maybe your post wasnt as clear as you wanted.

I dont think there is anything wrong with a discussion on the excess of Xmas, people getting into debt just to 'prove' how amazing thier kids Xmas is on social media (and we all know this happens), people feeling shit cos they cant show off mountains of presents round the tree due to finances, circumstances etc.
Lots of people get sucked into the more is best mantra.

As it is I spend my budget and thats it. Kids get what they want within reason and a few surprises (they dont ask for much at all tbh so its not a stretch to get small extras they will love) This year due to circumstances the budget is even smaller and they are totally fine with it. We dont go mad with food, just a few treats for us, as shops are hardly closed we can get any tops ups we need. But as its Xmas we do get things we wouldnt normally have the money for but it all gets eaten

Its easy for me as I dont have a large family to buy presents for (and I wouldnt be spending £100s on adults anyway even if I could afford to) just my kids and 3 other adults but I can appreciate from the many threads on here that people 'expect' presents for every family member and are pretty crap when posters dont want to do this or cant afford to do it. I dont understand that side of it at all. Adults do not need 20 presents at Xmas to prove how 'loved' they are from every family member, its madness.

You are right in that advertising has conditioned many people to spend more than they really want to or can afford at Xmas and add on the pressure from friends and relations showing off how much they have bought thier kids its easy to give in to it. I think it detracts from the whole winter festival/Xmas meaning (however you celebrate it it should be about family and time together enjoying yourself doing whatever you want to do whether its chilling out doing nothing or visiting relaltives, places etc) Having a mountain of presents means nothing if its just 'expected' or for show. Kids get overwhelmed with loads of pressies and dont know what to do first, cant remember what they all got or who its from or play with a fav thing and leave the rest for another day.

At the end of the day its up to individuals, if they can afford to spend loads and thier kids appreciate it then fine no skin off my nose, but I hate the whole pushing of Xmas from October onwards to buy buy buy or you wont have a nice Xmas. Rubbish. Xmas is what you make of it, its personal to you and your family not some advertisers ideal of what you should do. Buying a ton of crap wont make Xmas better if you are not in a good place to begin with.

Well judging by the balance of comments on this thread the planet is totally fucked. Yay.

OP, I am with you, hate mass consumerism, but most on here will just take cheap shots so best we keep our opinions to ourselves

OP I am with you. My concerns are environmental and it breaks my heart to think of all the plastic tat that gets made, shipped, packaged, bought, used for maybe half an hour and then chucked. It amazes me that people buy a lot of this stuff for their kids without thinking that it's their kids' future they are screwing up. Dh and I have just encouraged our work secret Santa's to be charity shop only. So all second hand stuff, money to charity and everyone gets a present . Win win.

You are right OP but Mumsnetters are a materialistic lot so I doubt they'll take heed. The best thing my family did is start secret Santa, I went from buying 25 presents every year to ONE! It's just stuff and all a load of bollocks in the long run but we are a consumer society and most of us are sheep who blindly buy into it all.

No OP you weren't you just got surprised that people took offence to being patronized and tried to alter your meaning

As it happens we are not overspenders but if we were your condescension would make so little difference it's laughable

Ultimately rather than trying to guilt trip people under the guise of "being concerned " as a way to bolster your own feelings of superiority , consider that as adults we are not necessarily so weak we succumb to pressure but actually make a choice that you choose not to agree with for our own reasons factoring in information that is freely and easily accessible.

So the point of your post and what is achieves is ......? What? Quite literally a waste of time

The message I hear from the OP's thread isstop buying in to the rampant consumerism that's everywhere, stop buying plastic tat that'll end up in landfill. I dontread it as be a mean fecker at Christmas, just be mindful of spending becausead erase erywhere tell us to.

Oh ffs, I've typed rubbish, I hate my iPad.

The cheap plastic things tend to get passed around families and then to charity shops. It is people sending on very expensive electroinc items or designer clothes which they cannot afford which concerns me more than landfill issue.

I was just hoping to generate some discussion about the pressure to spend

Then why the patronising instruction? Is that how you generally start a discussion?

SylviaAndSidney

Erm, that isn’t what virtue signalling is...

Erm...it most certainly is. 🙄

Furthermore the OP is right. Buying one beautiful cashmere scarf is so much better than buying things that people will not use.

It’s not a question of being mean. Some people are so ignorant.

I agree OP. We've cut right down, including buying loads of xmas food that ends up wasted, and it's much better. Me and dh just buy a few edible treats and a bottle for each other and the dcs are older, but still have a few gifts and a small stocking. We have a roast meal on xmas day and I generally work a shift. No fuss or stress. It helps not having lots of relatives to please of course.

I worry about the environmental impact and the way the shops cynically extract as much money out of people as possible.

We are definitely trying to cut down on unnecessary tat and waste this Christmas.

It’s not a question of people not having the money, necessarily. It’s about too many people being cavalier about a revolting amount of waste and excess. Fgs think of the planet.

All your idiotic comments about saving all year and spending what you want, merely show you up as being utterly stupid and uncaring. The excess and the waste and the debt so many incur is sad.

I have been cutting down for a few years now. Without the advice of a random MN thread. Go me! :o

Notcontent if you want to generate discussion then you stick around and take part in the thread you started. You didn't. Instead you posted some quite patronising instructions and off you went.

The environment is a concern all year round, it's really not the existence of Christmas that has fucked this planet. The problem is far bigger than what we buy in November/December and needs addressing at government level with changes in laws and investment in sustainable energy etc. We can all tell ourselves we've 'done our bit' by but how much impact do you really think we're having?

It's just another stick some MNers use to criticise others at this time of year because that's what some posters enjoy doing . They take a tiny amount of information such as 'I spend X' and draw conclusions about a posters parenting, about their priorities in life, how much time they spend with their children and so on. The environment is just a convenient hook to hang their judgement on - in other years it's been 'grabby, entitled children' and 'spending time as a family'. Because it makes a lot of them feel superior.

Of course, sometimes they'll respond to questions and concede that their £50 limit for environmental/moral/superior parenting reasons is made possible because their children's grandparents or other relatives stump up for the big purchases! Their children do get the Barbie houses, the big train sets, their teens do have consoles, iPads and smartphones. They just didn't pay for it.

By the way I presume people are aware that money actually does need to move through the economy? That if we all buy everything from charity shops and knit gifts out of lentils then wages will become more suppressed and jobs fewer? I spend plenty at Christmas and I can afford to. I'm not going to be shamed by strangers on the internet or apologise for having a good income but hey, knock yourselves out if it makes you feel good.

I'm quite happy to buy presents for those who want them (DH's family, my SIL on my side, DC and nephews). As I am happy to buy goats for my family. But as my thread yesterday showed even those who want goats and don't put any pressure on anyone else to receive them get shit for wanting them.

People are determined to buy unwanted wasteful stuff regardless of what's asked for. Now that pisses me off.

And just to be totally clear I don't consider it wasteful to spend money on whatever presents people want. If someone wants more scarves or jewellery or smellies or anything that's cool, I'm happy to provide. Just respect my choice to opt out!

Great Post Clowns Completely agree.

None of your business TBH.

I just bought gold infused gel for my face - am I in trouble?

I actually bought all my gifts in the sale last year so I have nothing to buy. So sad. Hence the gold gel for my face - I’m going to be so bloody bright and shiny like the Christmas star on top of my tree!! 🌟

Blimey, posters have really taken OP's thread personally.

In fact the country tends to need to grow the economy We've done that, lets try something different hey. It's not sustainable and we're trashing the planet.