Help me word an email to the school that isn't full of expletives please.

[ReanimatedSGB]

I know I can do better that 'For fuck's sake, you petty-minded bunch of cunts', of course...

DS got a day in inclusion (ie isolation) because of his shoes. They are, admittedly, not quite regulation shoes, though they are plain black - but he was wearing them because his normal school shoes were discovered to have a fucking great hole in on Sunday evening. He wore the not-quite-right shoes yesterday and there was no problem - I got home from work too late to take him shoe-shopping as my shift overran - but I got a phone call at work this morning saying they were 'unacceptable' and he would either be sent home or have to spend the day in inclusion. I was halfway up the M4 at the time. I explained the reason and that we were going to buy a new pair tomorrow (because I wouldn't be home till 7pm), but they said if he didn't have proper shoes in the morning it would be the same thing again.
Mercifully our nearest Sainsburys is open till 10pm and is one of those big enough to have a clothing and footwear department, so we have actually got new shoes, but what the fuck is the point of taking a well-behaved kid out of class for the day when he's only wearing not-quite-right shoes for a perfectly good reason.

YY the skirt thing is really odd. So much obsession over the length and style of teenage girls’ skirts.

It doesn’t end when they are in year 12 and 13 and don’t have to wear the school uniform.

Once asked a HT why the year 12 and 13 had to wear clothes that were described as Office ready so they could get used to dressing for work.

I asked him if he realised that not all careers involved working in an office.

It completely blew his mind.

He pointed out that at the school all the things they were teaching were about working in an office environment.

Gileswithachainsaw
Plain as in not branded or with shiny logos.

That's almost my point though.

We tell our students they need black leather school shoes with no embellishments.
Brogues, ballet flats, ankle boots under trousers, loader types, kitten heels etc we don't care as long as there are smart black shoes.
Parents apply a spot of common sense and unsurprisingly we don't have lots of uniform issues.

Other places I've worked at you'd get the 'but technically what is plain? But what about this lace? But the sole has a tiny bit of purple so I had to buy these clearly black trainers... I've bought a pair of branded trainers but it doesn't count because the branding is matte black... I'm going yo come in fuming because I've bought trainers but they were in the school section'.

Anyone with an ounce of sense knows what school shoes are. Some people think they are beyond rules.

I'd be up for a 'dress code, good; impossibly strict and expensive uniform rules leading to children missing lessons, bad' campaign.

I agree with uniforms at school, but I don't agree with the way it seems to be going, that it's become almost more important than the actual learning and teaching. One of the ideas is that if everyone wears the same, then children from lower income families don't get bullied for not having the latest thing. So isn't isolating a child because the item of uniform broken can't be replaced immediately due to lack of funds, totally defeating that objective?
Many families struggle, children grow and therefore a lot end up with cheap shoes - and they do fall apart with relatively little warning. Surely a pair of black shoes (not trainers) sturdy enough to offer support and keep the wet out should be the only consideration? Same with clothes, a plain white shirt, black sweater and black trousers surely is adequate? Why the obsession with logo's and styles?
And for those saying it prepares for wearing uniforms at work, the majority of places that insist on a certain uniform being worn supply the main items such as logo'd shirts or aprons etc and specify say, black trousers and black full shoes you're expected to supply yourself, they don't demand the employees buy the whole uniform and sanction them if they are unable to.

There needs to be some fight back from parents on this. My son was placed in isolation for wearing plain black mesh black trainers (he had a note) the day after an ingrown toenail procedure. We were told he would be in there until he was able to wear his school shoes (turned out to be six weeks!)
Two other children were in there for the same reason. All the parents told the school in no uncertain terms that they were being ridiculous.

YY the skirt thing is really odd. So much obsession over the length and style of teenage girls’ skirts
Showing your arse and underwear isn't appropriate in the workplace.
I don't care if they are male or female students, male or female colleagues, keep your arse, underwear and genitals covered. It's not difficult.

Then say non patent. Plain to me meant plain. So I spent 3 hours in call is trying to work out if her usual school shoes woukd be acceptable as they had decorative stitching. I left with the only actual plain pair with no embroidery no red/green tabs and not patent 72 pounds .

For school shoes. For a 12 yr old. And damaged in the first week after she was shoved around constantly.

DS2's school has rules on acceptable coats but they aren't allowed to wear coats in school. I just think it overshoots the mark tbh. No gloves, hats or scarves allowed either.

Gileswithachainsaw
I wasn't quoting our school policy word for word.
Apply a bit of charity. But to oversimplify:
School say they want school shoes
Some parents think fuck common sense and a little bit of sensible judgement. I'm going to buy shoes that are clearly not school shoes and then whine to the local press.
School decides enough is enough and brings in prescriptive rules.

Thankfully my school doesn't have to go down that route because our parents apply the tiniest ounce of common sense.

But these prescriptive rules are often difficult or impossible.

I assumed ones like her old ones would be ok.

For reference they were non patent angry angels brogues. I haven't bought trainers or anything I would consider dubious but I didn't want to risk it so went with what was effectively the only option and an extremely expensive one.

People who don't follow the rules intentionally won't give a shit what you do. But in trying to accommodate those who don't care you make it expensive and impossible for those who do try

I'll have a crack at writing something. I am ambivalant about uniforms, personally I dislike them but when I have had to wear one as an adult they were provided and had some sort of purpose (e.g. front of house in a cafe) and often had a PPE element (closed toe footwear, hair tied back no painted nails etc).
I am sympathetic to a uniform policy where you can obtain them from local stores and logoes could be bought separately - my old comp had the option that you could sew logo badges onto a suitable blue sweater for instance.

But when you have to do to a specific supplier for something that's going to be grown out of soon is so stupid. Plus some is actually anti-PPE - like actively disallowing boots in cold weather or making children wear unsuitable clothing for the conditions. It serves no one except those who care more about image rather than the needs of pupils and what teachers REALLY want.

So you're being sexually harassed by your classmates and older boys on the way home? We're OK with that 'cause its not on school premises and it's not our problem.

Wearing DM's because its cold?! Not good enough go home as apparently non-regulation footwear makes you impossible to teach!

Teacher here too...how can working parents be expected to go and buy shoes during the week...ridiculous!
Plus not everyone has the spare cash. I would be making sure that the isolation is taken of the system (as in not on his record) and like you say, go on up to the governors if necessary.

Oh god, coats were the same. Plain black. No logos, no stripes, no patterns, no coloured zips, no coloured hoods, no fake fur trim on hoods, no makers' marks.

All costs to be removed prior to entry to the school, even when it was pissing down

autumn
I don't think I have ever seen a coat that first that description.

Are kids meant to walk 45 mins in the rain in the rain and snow?

Sorry, all COATS to be removed

The trouble is, Maisy, people have different ideas of common sense. To me it's common sense that you don't wear kitten heels to school - they're silly shoes. Plain black trainers with a tiny bit of purple on the sole though - what's wrong with those? Far more sensible and practical.

Gileswithachainsaw
I'm not a fan of highly prescriptive rules. I can take or leave uniform as an entity.

I just have some sympathy with heads who feel they have to go down that route as part of a school improvement plan. If you've got 50%+ of a cohort who've refused to vaguely follow simple rules, most of them will not be 'hard hitters' (for want of a better expression). There's a hand full of people who will a challenge followed by others who have followed the dominant school culture. Firm and clear rules will tend to ensure that most of the students do end up learning to follow simple instructions and as part of other measures the school can start to focus more on learning. Then they can focus on the ones who will be defiant (and those who want to be defiant then don't have a pose of admirers/followers).

KatherinaMinola
If the rule is school shoes then that's for the parent to decide. (E.g. i walked to school in kitten heels and had zero issues. My friend hated them and couldn't wear them.)
If the rule says school shoes and a parent buys trainers, that's not differing ideas of common sense. That's a parent deciding 'my child is above the rules and I'm going to show them they can pick which rules to follow'.

Maisy, thanks for explaining, perhaps best if we agree to disagree on some points (I think fair play to the parents who let their kids get a spray tan, surely that doesn’t make them unteachable), I suppose I don’t have secondary age children and don’t reach children so of course can’t fully understand it.

JohnMcCain, I agree the no boots thing is an anti PPE rule!

Good point about the uniforms at work. Mine are provided free as are everyone’s who work in our large organisation. There would be a mass revolt if staff were expected to pay for it. In addition it means it is almost impossible for staff not to eat t correctly. Lots of staff do not wear a uniform. Some areas have a dress code but it is very broad! Lots of short skirts, trousers, anything.

Shoes need to be blue or black and reasonably practical. Trainers are fine. Very, very rare for anyone to be told off about their footwear as the rules are broad enough that everyone can follow.

I would keep your DS off school tomorrow, phone in and tell the shower of shits that he won't be back until he has new shoes. Absolutely ridiculous.

Ah, you see to me plain black trainers are shoes. So I would misinterpret your rule.

I do struggle to see why plain, comfortable, practical, waterproof shoes would be more of an issue than heels for schoolchildren. That is my common sense.

I’ve said this on threads here before but I teach adults at times and am frequently appalled by the number who can not assess rules or feel they are not allowed to assess and decide which ones are ridiculous / downright dangerous and which ones should be followed. When to challenge things and when to accept them. I guess perhaps these obedience factories are to blame for some of that.

Are these schools not preparing any pupils for (say) universities or construction sites, then?

I think it's become counter productive now though.

People walk into a shop ask for school shoes. Talking proper shoe shop here. Like Clark's or clinks. They walk out with what they assume is and has been sold as a school shoe.

Then They find out the stitching isn't suitable. Or there's a coloured dot on the Bottom of the shoe.

It's at that point most the people who other wise had the text book uniform and had never been on a schools radar ever. Not between all three kids, go "fuck it" I'm.70 quid out of pocket they are perfectly acceptable shoes and I'm.not buying anymore

If you look at some of the restrictions they are all but impossible. The sooner schools realise that when a large percentage of the cohort seen to be having trouble maybe theres something a bit off