To embarrass DH in public?

[Largepiecesofcrookedwood]

A quick bit of background...
DH and I have always liked a drink and, until recently, all has been well. Over the past year or so DH has reacted very badly to more than a couple of pints and can be incredibly hurtful and malicious to both DS and I. It came to the point where I realised I would rather leave than stay in the situation and we had a crisis talk. At no point did I demand that DH cut down/ give up drinking, I merely made the point that I would not be staying in the relationship if things continued as they were.
DH decided that he wanted to stay together and cut back his drinking radically, our relationship and home life is calmer and I'm slowly starting to relax again. The only thing that really pisses me off is if we're out for a drink (I very rarely drink now so am inevitably sober on these occasions) and we're asked if we are staying for another. DH will put on a sad face and say "no, I'm not allowed to enjoy myself anymore" which is then the cue for much chuckling and sympathetic noises.
I really want to turn round and say "well DH, you could stay and enjoy yourself, but then you'd be an arse to your family when you get home, upset your wife, alienate your son and then collapse in bed leaving the house in a state wouldn't you?"
However in real life I think this just sounds petty, like airing our dirty laundry in public. I'm sure I would judge both halves of a couple equally badly if I heard a similar conversation. DH would also be embarrassed to be shown up in public which is firstly not nice anyway and secondly not likely to be helpful in any way.
I think I'm NBU to be pissed off by it, but WIBU to remind him in public why things are like they are?

that a tough one.and just because he doesn't smash the place up or be violant there are still horrid consequences to certain people when they are drunk which can be awful to deal with.and just becomes too much.im impressed you got him to stop.and you have too.well done.
would you be able to bring it up in private.then maybe say if you keep blamin it on me how would you like it if I replied back with equally as vile comeback telling the public why you actually are stopping.

Agree with Topsey. One warning when sober then tell the truth.

It shouldn’t be an airing of dirty laundry - it is sharing of a basic fact of your lives with friends.

“Unfortunately whenever Fred has got drunk in the last couple of years he has been very unpleasant to both myself and LittleOne. As I am not prepared to raise LittleOne in an abusive home Fred has had to make some tough choices.”

The aim is matter if fact and sharing of information - not a big marital bust up in public.

To give an example of the tone you want - my db is allergic to nuts. Not dangerously allergic but allergic enough that he would probably vomit for a few hours afterwards if he ate them. Imagine he and I are at someone’s house and they bring out a lively looking cake covered in nuts. Normally brother would explain himself but if he had gone to the loo or was wrangler his toddler then either myself or his partner would just say “oooh Dan can’t have the cake as he has a nut allergy”.

Again - sharing of important info not airing private details.

"No dear, had you forgotten?" sweet smile "it's because you act like an utter tosser when you're pissed."

Finished off with a tinkly laugh of course...

'Because you're a nasty drunk dear' and then a smile.

I agree with AF and others, tell him this in private. Give him warning that if he decides to present himself as the victim of his misery wife again, you'll be ready to set the record straight.

Why don't you pull him up and tell him that the next time he does it, you'll put your version of events forward? In the interest of balance, of course, 🤔

I think he will stop.

His mates are probably aware he's an unpleasant drunk though aren't they? I'm sure they wouldn't be surprised to hear 'after 2 pints I'm a right nightmare to take home'

His mates must be aware he is a nasty drunk. I assume some of them have also been on the receiving end of his toolery

Unless he saves it all for you and dc ? In which case, have a good hard think about why that might be

Thanks for all your replies and sorry for the silence as I'm actually at work.
To clarify a couple of points, DH is more than old enough to know better (he is actually heading towards retirement age)
We generally go out together and it's normally our small local, if not it's nice comfortable country pubs, rather than standing round in a crowded 'Spoons surrounded by "mates".
The arsey behaviour has come on in recent times and is out of character, so much so that I've made DH go to the GP as we suspected liver issues (all came back clear)
On two pints he's fine, three is touch and go depending on what he's eaten, how tired he is etc but I'd prefer not to get to that point. I've always been concerned that I will be seen to have "forced" DH into cutting down and I've been very careful to word things so this isn't the case- I can see that it's hard to look at things from his point of view and not see it as such on some level though.

The first time my DP said this I would have relayed to the whole group, in minute detail, what happens when he has too much to drink. Thus embarrassing everybody. But I am probably immature 🤷🏼‍♀️

I think you need to change how you socialise OP and start bypassing the local pub.