To demand my child's clothes back?

[laadedaa]

My PIL pick up my LO from nursery once a week. I send a spare outfit in his book bag to change into after nursery (it's a forest school so he's proper grubby when he comes out.)
Every god damned week I ask if they can send back his dirty clothes for me to wash. Every week they keep his clothes which means it stays there for the week (he only sees them once a week).
I either have to drive the half hour there and half hour back each week to pick up the clothes or just not have them for the week.
Yes I know they are doing me a favour by washing them. Yes I know that I could just buy two more outfits, but it's a bit annoying buying 2 extra trousers, jumpers, vests, pants and socks. He's growing so quickly that I'm forever buying clothes.
How do I politely stop the PIL holding his clothes hostage??

How does he get from their house to your house? Do they drop off?

What the heck is a 'Forest School?'

Refuse the free child care they obviously aren't up to the required standard?

Sometimes dropped off, sometimes I get him. If I get him, I ask where the clothes are. They are either in the washing machine or their laundry basket. I can't go through their laundry basket... or maybe I could... I don't know, that seems weird.

How come you can't take them at the same time as you take your ds?

Go through the laundry basket. I suspect you'll only have to do it once!

Well, why don’t you let them keep them there, and if they’ve washed them, they can be the clean clothes he changes into after forest school and then you don’t have to send clean clothes with him next week?

@InfiniteSheldon I'm guessing that's sarcasm. I don't need them to get him. My DM could easily have him that day. They get him because they want him to themselves for a few hours every week.

Why don't you just ask them for the clothes back? Appreciate it's not always that simple though as we have a clothes issues with DSD

Yep, be a CF and breezily say you'll get the clothes and then just do it! Some people just won't take a hint.

What bastards.

Totally worth the blasphemy I'd say.

Why do you need to keep sending clothes? They have a clean set, change him when he gets home, wash that set therefore have a set for the week after!

@Weebitawks because that leaves me two outfits short for the rest of the week. Which means I have to pay out for more or do more washing all the time.

I get it OP; the clothes you need for forest school are special - thick trousers, thin and thick fleeces, thermal vests thick socks etc. I wouldn't like to have to buy double sets of everything. Perhaps put a plastic bag in the backpack and tell them to put the clothes in there. If they are not in the bag when you pick him up you'll just have to go through their laundry basket.

When they say they’re in the wash basket say ‘can I just grab them then?’ If they say yes, you’ve got the clothes, if they say no, ask them to go and get them and you have the clothes. It’s not rocket surgery.

Why not just leave them there and not pack a spare set the following week? Surely he can change into the clothes they already have.

Demand? What a lovely way to speak to relations! It's an outfit, nothing to get upset over I wouldn't have thought. They obviously think they are doing you a favour. Get dh to pick up, or drive over or demand clothes back etc?

Well if they’re in the laundry basket just say “would you mind getting them for me please so I can take them home?” I feel this is a non- issue.

they are keeping hold of TWO outfits a week, not one. Sometimes I don't see some clothes for 2-3 weeks. Presumably they get lost in their laundry basket.

I've just realised you meant they''re keeping his school clothes, not the ones he changes into. Ignore me, I've not had any chocolate so my thinking capacity is low.

How is it two outfits? Surely he comes home in the one he is changed into?

Demand, really? Thought not.

Just talk to MIL and ask her to bring the dirty clothes back when she drops off DS.

I am a whimp when it comes to confrontation. We had a falling out recently, so I'm trying to tread carefully and not upset them. I guess I need to put on my big girl pants.

They probably don't realise that it is so important to you to have them back. If he was at regular nursery it wouldn't matter.
Explain to them why you need to have all his clothes back every week.

@Sirzy he comes home in PJs, should have mentioned that.