To find it really distasteful to take photos of your children’s gifts?

[StarfishSandwich]

I’ve noticed a trend on Facebook for mums to post photos the night before their child’s birthday of a big pile of wrapped up gifts. Or just as bad, after the event posting a picture of a big pile of opened gifts.

Since when does anyone want to see pictures of presents? It feels really tacky and showy.

Yup pretty embarrassing, trying to show off. It's the people with less that would do it in order to prove something.

My parents always used to take pictures of us next to our presents on Christmas mornings and Birthdays - very late 80s and well into the 90s/00s. I LOVE looking back at those photos and seeing all the amazing things I was given over the years. I can watch myself grow up all over again I get wonderfully nostalgic remembering all the hours I spent playing with certain toys, using my telescope, reading 'retro' comics, etc. Granted, these photos were never plastered all over social media, but it's lovely to have those memories documented.

I've always done the same with my DD, who is now 11.5yo, and will continue to do so. I admit, I used to post these pictures on SM. And then we had a really difficult year in terms of finances when she was younger, so the Christmas present pile was decidedly thinner that year than previous years. I remember actually feeling a sense of shame about it and being too embarrassed to post the picture on FB. How ridiculous is that?! On the plus side, however, it gave me the shake I needed to see and experience the negative impacts of SM and I started backing well away from it. I've since deleted everything. The fact was DD had a wonderful Christmas - we all did! And even though money was tight, I'd done my damn best, which is all anyone can ever do. I've never allowed myself to feel like that again. I liken it to a weird competition that I have zero interest competing in.

Wait... why would you pleased for someone for getting a new car? It's just a car! I can't imagine my friends ever telling me that they bought a new car!

It's crass

I'll take a photo of my DD in front of her presents this year to put in her memory box and to send to my mum and family, because it's her first Christmas. But each to their own when it comes to putting photos on social media, it's not really affecting you is it?

You and your friends don't tell each other when you make a major purchase?

That's weird imo.

My friends and I would discuss a new car, new house, even something like a new shed would come up.

I guess I'm just not a competitive person, I afford what I can afford and my friends are the same and we are all happy for each other.

The people saying it's crass and tacky are obviously of the mindset that they have to be better than others and that's why they think these people are just showing off.

It takes all sorts to make the world go round I guess

Social media is almost entirely about showing off. If you're not into that, don't use it...?

You and your friends don't tell each other when you make a major purchase?

Obviously if someone moves house it's gonna be talked about. But no, I don't really keep track of what cars my friends drive. It's not as if we hide it and if I met up with one straight after they'd been looking around a showroom I'm sure they'd mention it, but in general nobody would announce it to the rest of us! Why would they? I'd just be like "ok...cool"

To me, it's showing off. It's a parent saying look what I got my kids. They can send photos by email to family members or even by WhatsAppb if they are just sharing with family. I also see adults doing the same with presents they have received saying thanks for all the presents and messages, I was well and truly spoilt. As for them being a memories children can look back at, you can do that with albums you create on your computer. You don't need social media to do that. There are parents though who simply can't do anything without sharing it on Facebook.

I just scroll past and ignore them.

A couple of pictures of excited children opening presents is fine IMO but it’s the photos and photos of the arranged presents draped over the sofa. I have a friend who does this half her living room is filled with presents then she arranged them all for more photos 5 pairs of trainers, 10 computer games all in a row!

Saving the money, buying the presents,wrapping them up and displaying them nicely takes quite a lot of effort and thought. No way am I just going to forget about it and not post a picture online. I want to remember big occasions like birthdays and Christmas. I don't buy many presents anymore, it's not bragging, it's remembering the good times.

Ooooh I hate it too. I swear, one room, a house with 2 kids, there was barely any floor showing. It was obscene.

The thing is this is just one example, there must be plenty of photos you see which you don't care about, in fact if you imagine you spend 2 seconds per photo I bet you have wasted hours by now looking at pointless uninteresting crap that peoole post on facebook and you have plenty more hours left to waste. I don't want to see half the crap that people post on facebook, they should get a cloud to save their pics. Why everything has to be shared on social media now i have no clue. just block and avoid. You have a choice to use facebook after all so dont use it or dont look at their posts.

I barely use fb any more but none of my friends or family abroad do this but I’ve seen examples. Nothing wrong with showing decor, happy kids but it’s when the toys are all lined up etc, I do have an Argos catalogue myself thanks. It’s just weird imo like the people who post gushing tributes to their husband & children on their anniversary/birthdays. What’s wrong with a card or just saying it in person?

Taking a picture of it is fine, but like a PP I’d be worried about making it plain that there had clearly been a lot of money spent, and those brand new valuables were conveniently wrapped and piled on my sofa.

Same reason I don’t post when I’m on holiday or when DH is away with work- there are some dickheads about who use SM for less honest purposes than keeping up with friends.

it’s not about the presents

If it's not about the presents, why post a picture that is just the presents?

I think it's all a bit Dudley Dursley.

I take a photo of "the birthday table" all set up the night before - the gifts, cards and balloons waiting for them. I take a couple of photos while they are opening them and then one after of what they received. I do the same at Christmas. My mum did the same when we were little.

None of it goes on fb as it's just memories for us and the DC.

I sometimes put a photo up of a child loving a toy from a relative in a "thank you Aunty Maud, Johnny loves his showtunes DVD."
But no, why would I post pictures of gifts I have bought for my child? I've seen them bloody open it

I know some people who not only arrange all their kids gifts in a pile and post a picture, but they do it with both her and her OHs too? It’s odd.

Yes @Oopsusernamealreadytaken!

Bonus points if they posted a picture of the gifts from their DP with the caption “Boy done good!” as if he wasn’t told what exact Michael Korrs watch she wanted

You can still take a photo. I always take lots Christmas morning. I always have thrm printed for future years but it is a family photo to look back on, not a FB photo.

I agree OP, its crass and vulgar

I am in the ‘it’s really crass’ camp. Having said that for me birthdays and Christmases are not about the presents and the whole materialistic bit and DS1 knows that (DS2 is a toddler). What I hope matters to him that is Mummy and Daddy with their suspect baking talent made a cake, got him a card, decorated the room with Daddy and we had a day together. Similarly we spend Christmas with our extended family and I hope he remembers that more than who gave him what.

Having said that, we are fortunate enough that DS1 and 2 get presents/new toys/books through the year and so we don’t go nuts for Christmas. Maybe 50 quid per kid from us. He’s asked FC for a board game that he and the toddler can play (HELP!!!). He’s also asked for a light up musical book on behalf of his sibling!
So no I don’t get it at all. I cannot remember a single gift I got under the age of 10 really.

And why is the choice between over the top gifts brandished on FB and arguing parents? Surely it’s possible to have a few gifts (or really as many as you want), not plastered on FB and a relatively pleasant day with one’s family? Are these mutually exclusive?

On his birthday I take photos of him opening presents from family who are living far away and maybe a small thank you video and then when I catch him playing with it, I take another small video and WhatsApp it to the person in question.

I'm guilty of doing this once. But in fairness, it's because I don't feel like I'm doing enough. She's in boarding school (not for reasons I chose). So when she was going into secondary I bought her a load of little things (post it notes, pens, stapler that sort of stuff) over a few weeks but the big thing was an ipad. It was happily camouflaged amongst the rest of the tat. She was grateful for every little thing. But when she saw the iPAD, I was abandoned lol. Some of us don't get to spend all our time with our kids for reasons we have chosen. Just bear with us lol. We're just proud I guess of the surprises. No-one on my friends list would have thought me to be showing off because it's a limited list (family and close friends) and they all know the circumstances. Most were happy to see me happy. If others weren't, they didn't tell me haha.