Aibu ? Too 'early' to send wedding invitations out?

[HolidayAmaradillo]

Due to get married on the 1st of august. I've been badgering my other half to send out the invitations to his side of the family and his friends.
He claims it's too early. I claim that he just doesn't give a shit - not exactly the best start to our almost married life.
But here's the thing, our venue needs the numbers around the 10th of June, it's also a weekday and we've invited people travelling from 3/4 hours away so I'd like to make sure enough notice is given.
Also I want them out now as I had already sent out invitations but then the venue we had chosen closed down, scampered off with our money meaning that the invitations needed changed and I didn't want people trying to book a room within the previous venue I know that 6/7 months is Still a lot of notice but then if somebody can't make it, it allows us to quickly make up more invitations inviting others. Or am I just being crazy early?

@Graphista - "I've never received a wedding invitation more than 8 weeks in advance of a wedding" as a full guest? As someone who used to work in the industry I find that hard to believe as most venues want final numbers a minimum of 2 months in advance of the date to plan catering orders etc.

Yes, as a full guest. Why would I lie about something so innocuous?

Honestly I think its way too early, firstly at work I cannot book next years holidays until the new year,- this is deliberate policy to stop people grabbing same weeks over and over , so hr will wait till end of Jan to look at summer time holidays. I know of at least two friends who's offices work the same way.

Secondly if I see invite now I'm not going to rsvp till its sorted, first there is Christmas and new year to sort, my head is mashed as it is with them, before I start even thinking of booking places and summer outfits and booking holidays off. Then honestly unless I was a close sibling my family holiday plans will trump your wedding every time, so yes very strong chance we will be on holidays August 1, but not definite wouldn't like to say yes I am coming and then can't so again gets put on long finger, putting it on long finger probably means ill forget about it and you'd be chasing up next April, so better let people settle into the new year and when its the grey dismal end of Jan or even better Feb. nice happy event to plan for invite pops into letter box, I'd be far more in mood to deal with it as something good to look forward to.

Theymademe - I wasn't thinking you were lying at all! But for evening guests it's entirely possible invites not sent out as early as for full guests who are possibly needing to come from a distance, book accommodation etc.

Even 10/12 years ago when I was working in the industry they were sent generally around 6 months before the wedding to full guests, most venues want final numbers minimum 2 months in advance and people can take a while to rsvp or may need time to work out if they can make it/afford it etc

@Graphista - I wasn't thinking you were lying at all! But for evening guests it's entirely possible invites not sent out as early as for full guests who are possibly needing to come from a distance, book accommodation etc.

You said you found it hard to believe that I had never got an invitation more than 8 weeks in advance, which strongly suggests you believe my statement was untrue. So by implication, either I lied, or don't know the difference between a full invitation and an evening one and, if so, have never been invited to a full wedding.

Funnily enough, I have no difficulty in believing other people when they say they expect invitations 6 months in advance. Different people, different experiences.

Surely the 6-8 weeks thing was just for the olden days when everyone lived locally and had nothing better to do than go to weddings. It would be too little time for anyone needing to travel and make plans.

Now is fine considering it's August and holiday month for a lot of people.

If it's a money issue just drop an email to those you're inviting and say you're getting married on X date proper invites to follow.

I'd re send save the dates giving the venue change, but wouldn't send actual invites until closer.

Personally if I was being invited I'd want as much notice as possible for a wedding. I don't care if its an early invite I'd want to be able to plan around it. I've already booked our summer holiday abroad and now finalising how to use the rest of my annual leave.
Particularly as a weekday I'd definitely get invites out before New year when lots of people's annual leave year starts.

Although your venue will require “final numbers” by a certain date, you can add people on as late as the day before if you really need to. (Taking people off is not as easy so if you’re estimating, underestimate rather than overestimate!)

IMO no such thing as too early. I like to be able to make plans.

6-8 weeks in advance, 3 months if you absolutely must. The people that want to be there will make the effort.

8 weeks is the norm surely?

Are most people even engaged a year before?

Are most people even engaged a year before?

Unfortunately yes. DH and I were engaged for 3 years because it took us that long to save up enough money for our relatively cheap wedding (whilst saving for a deposit for our house).

OP why not have Christmas/Festive cards ready for posting at the end of November with a note clipped inside advising of change of venue and reissuing of invites to follow in March/whenever

@holidayaramadillo YOU said in a pp that 8 weeks is normal.

Not really as I don't want to waste even more money, people already know the date as like I said I had previous invitations go out already. I thought 8 weeks in advance was normal? so that's maybe why others are saying 8 weeks too?

I sent out a text with a clear title Save the Date, with the day, time, venue and 'invitations to follow'. I asked my fil to pass it on to certain members of his family etc so it got to everyone even if I didn't have their number. Free, easy and gave all the info.

I was at a clients house this week and spotted she’d got a wedding invitation on her window sill for August next year and it’s been there a while as I’ve spotted it before.

Send the invites out regardless. People may be booking their holidays now for next summer and they may not necessarily have your date at the forefront of their minds.

@rebeccacloud9 no YOU misread. The 8 weeks I was referring to was that people were gobsmacked that a venue needed numbers so far in advance

I don't think it's too early.

I've been sent a save the date/invite for weddings next year.

You want to warn people, so that they don't book holidays then, and can get time off etc.

Ah sorry, I didn't see you were replying to a pp. I thought you were still talking about sending the invitations out.

Some of my guests told me almost immediately after getting the save the date texts that they had booked accommodation (way way earlier than I would have got around to doing it!) So in your case I would definitely let them know asap about the change of venue at least. My invitations took ages to sort (choosing the invitation, finalising the wording, including all the extra info etc) too.

To be honest if I'd made my travel plans and booked accommodation in advance and then got a last minute invitation with a different location I would sack the whole thing off. It's a crappy way to treat your guests.

Our wedding was three and a half months after we decided to get married, our invitations went out eight weeks before, it didn't bother anyone including those who flew to it from N Ireland and Germany.