To ask for people to help me get through this journey

[mamahanji]

I'm stuck on a 3 hour train. There was a massive cock up and the train is now considerably smaller than it was supposed to be. All reserved seating is now a free for all.

I have osteomalacia and standing is agony right now with this constant jolting and jarring.

I'm currently jammed against the door with barely room to shift position.

I feel on the edge of a panic attack.

Anyone that is bored and has a funny story or interesting fact. I just need to distract my head. Can't focus on reading. And the fucker in front of me has started eating a tuna melt so I might vom too 😭

Make up back stories for everyone else in your head. As ridiculous and soap opera-y as possible! Hope it gets easier/someone gives you a seat!

Go and find the priority seats. You need one.

Is there no priority seating that you can use?

Priority seats? First class?
Also second making up stories in your head about all those around you.
Is there a bar? Hit the gin ASAP
There is always space at the bar. Standing, but at least you’ll have GIN

Have to add, the first non expensive train on a Friday night is a fucking shit show. Total madness.

What about a funny thread? This one had me in stitches on my way home www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/3412099-what-the-actual-fuck-a-hair-there?msgid=82270098

Not a funny story but an annoying as hell one:
Nursery don’t clean out soiled underwear (fair enough) but why oh why can you tell me when there is bloody soup/chocolate/jam whatever food item down the clothes but CANNOT pre warn me that there is a lump of shit in the bag of knickers 🤦‍♀️ (Currently potty training)

Can you not see if someone in priory seat will move for you?

Poor you! Not much help here, as am putting DC to bed while eating raw garlic and knocking back hot ginger and honey in an effort to stave off a rapid onset cold. Am MNing to distract myself from mounting panic about falling ill just as work is about to resume next week, so totally relating.
Hope lots of people come along to help you pass the time, OP!

You poor thing! I'm on a 4 hour car journey tomy in-laws for my SIL's wedding this weekend and it is going to be a nightmare. Imagine the most awkward experience of your life, multiply it by a million, and that will be my next 3 days. Please have fun thinking of all the misery I'll be in!

Your sil wedding??!! Isn’t she married to your brother already...

Go and read some threads from classics, they will be long, funny and will distract you. Also do you have a game like candy crush on your phone?

There were 4 first class coaches which have now been condensed into 1 so first class is completely rammed.

It was supposed to be a lot more coaches so there's way more people than space.

This is my space. 2 hours and 38 minutes to go.

The fucker infront of me has just started eating a Jamaican pasty.

God that looks grim. nice Trainers though!

Also, lots of people might get off early, they look like workers not weekenders. So might get off around an hour in.

@Holdingonbarely

No, she is my husband's sister. I have no siblings.

Reach out your mouth and take a bite of it - I dare you! 🤣

@Aquamarine1029
Aaah. Sorry I made up a story in my head that you’d all been forced to go to ex sil wedding an that it was going to be super awkward! See it’s easy to do!!

That looks hideous OP! maybe my day will cheer you up - my cat is poorly so took them to the vets and had to hold them while they had a suppository. Less than 5 mins later he has pooped in his carrier, in my car and is looking at me like an evil mummy. I've spent my evening scrubbing cat poop. Given the vet says it takes 30 mins to kick in I think he may have hurried it along a little bit!

I went to a zoo the other day. It only had one dog in it.
It was a shitzu.

At least your're not constipated (are you?) I'm currently laying in bed researching lubricant laxatives, which DH & our DG's have gone to a party.

Seriously, if you feel like you're going to panic, start counting, visualising all the number. Normally works for me.

Perhaps you could dig deep in your mind for 💩 tips?

What are you looking forwards to this weekend?

Last time l was on a train a guy quite close to me was chatting to his gf/ dw on face time. She was completely naked walking around the house chatting away to him. He was talking abour regular mundane things but it was so awkward for me as he made no effort to hold up the phone. So hopefully your eating guy wont start to make some calls after his picnic. Can you sit on your luggage or even on the floor? Could you pretend to faint so they would have to get you a seat?

Can you not claim one of the disabled-person seats? Will the train truly be crammed all rest of journey (they usually empty out somewhere).

Have you seen this (circulating on my FBk)

Thank you for everyone that helped!

In the end I completely zoned out and made it through.

Managed to reserve a seat on this mornings train so a much more pleasant journey all around!