AIBU? Am I being a bad host?

[Greenbeanmcgee]

A friend who lives on the other side of the country is going to be staying with me for a few days. I'm looking forward to it but she wants to attend church on the Sunday. That isn't a problem at all. I said that I'd have a nice lunch ready for her when she returns but she wants me to attend and won't stop asking.

I really don't want to go. I'm an Atheist and have no desire to attend church unless it's necessary. Also her particular style of church makes me extremely uncomfortable. Just a personal preference.
I could also use the time to get some work done.

So AIBU?

Miscible

I had no idea that Alpha was like this! As I said - I'd heard good things but never had anything to do with it.

Like you, I've always believed that prayer was for important stuff, and that God has better things to do than find me a parking space etc

I did once get a telling off from my priest for criticising John (don't know if any of you know of him - he's googleable, I would think). He's a very evangelical and supposedly charismatic evangelist preacher who tours the country "bringing people to God". Our church got a bus up.

We went to his marquee, and he started his spiel, and local people were there to witness what God had done for them (one local businessman said that since he started to "tithe" and give a tenth of his profit to the church, God had increased his turnover 50-fold - all that shite (and I speak as a Christian)) - and I thought- "he's just another one of the 'healthandwealthGoddoesn'tloveyouifhedoesn'tgiveyoumoney' preachers (I can't bear them).

And then IT happened. There was a young couple in another part of the tent whose baby started to cry - and honestly, it wasn't that bad - small baby, kitten-y cry. John stopped seeking and said "Get those people out of this service - I can't go on with this" and I swear to God, a bunch of "bouncers" (no other word) herded that poor couple out of the tent - humiliated them in front of everyone - and the nasty little twat didn't resume until they'd been taken outside. I was disgusted! If I could have got out, and been able to get home without the church bus, I would have left myself. It was awful.

Anyway - a couple of weeks later our Bishop was visiting our church and ranting on about what a wonderful man JJohn was etc etc etc - so I told him what I thought and why. He said "Well it's very hard to concentrate when a child is crying" and turned his back on me. He also complained to our dick of a priest who gave me a rollicking because "the bishop thinks very highly of JJohn".

Bollox - he presents the same material week in week out in different parts of the country and has been for years. If he doesn't know his script well enough by now not to be put off by an infant cry, then he doesn't impress me.

(In contrast - one of our other then Bishops, the lovely John Prichard, had half a dozen screaming children in the church when he preached - he said "Oh dear - I'd better make this a good one, seeing as the critics are in". He was lovely with them all after the service, too.)

*JJohn - not John - just noticed that autocorrect has taken upon itself to alter all of my spelling of his name (Perhaps I should have put J John)

Or maybe God protects him from its like me. Who knows . . .

Schadenfreude that made me laugh. My relationship with the local CoS never recovered after the minister managed to offend my agnostic DH, my catholic MIL, my Jewish FIL and my gay brother before berating the 3 year old elder brother of the christening party for his less than immaculate behaviour all within one service.

Schadenfreude just going to echo that Bishop John (Pritchard) is lovely. And I'm also not a fan of JJohn!
Unfortunately I've come across both excellent and atrocious Alpha courses and could believe anything people say about them there's such a range! There is no central training or quality control, just some resources given out and the groups leading them left to it.
Hope OP comes back to let us know how the weekend went. Also OP, please try to be there for your friend even though she's a bit - umm trying? - at the moment. These cultlike places are breeding grounds for spiritual and emotional abuse, and although of course it might be all lovely, if it isn't she'll need a friend outside.

Wow! That minister must have been a corker howabout - that's quite an achievement even for a priest,

I don't know how these prosperity preachers manage to reconcile Jesus' condemnation of personal wealth accumulation with their grasping greedy theology.

And again - Jesus has so much love and care for the poor and the sick and the vulnerable - and yet these preachers and their followers say quite openly that if God loves you you'll be healthy and wealthy (so if you aren't it's because you're sinful, or your faith isn't strong enough).

It's cruel - how many poor souls are blaming themselves, and being blamed by others, because they have a chronic or even terminal illness, or can't get a job etc?

I'm glad to know I'm not the only person who hasn't much of an opinion of JJohn TigerMummy - the church was buzzing about how wonderful he was after his evangelising week - only myself, DH and one other lady were unimpressed.

OP's friend will indeed need support if she tries to leave this church - sadly these "churches" often work the same way that abusive men do; they separate their "subjects" from their families and support networks, and when they are totally alone, that is when the screws are tightened. It is very sad and lonely life for many of the members of these "churches".

Alpha courses are definitely very variable. Not only does the person delivering the talk have the ability to go off script and say what they want (although the central Alpha organisation don't really like this, they want you to follow the script closely, but there's no way they can police it) ... but also, a key part of Alpha is the small group table discussions, and even if the teacher/ pastor leading the class is good, it's hard to get 8+ good small group leaders who are committed, have the leadership and people skills AND know what they're talking about, so you can easily end up with someone keen but uninformed. And then the small group discussion is open to everyone on the table, whatever their background, and you're not supposed to correct any heresy (), just let them say what they feel, so they can come out with complete crap.