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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Since when did kids get so... grabby?! (A Halloween one)

390 replies

MessyHouse91 · 31/10/2018 17:53

Perfectly happy to be slated here - I don’t spend much time with kids (expecting DC1) so this might just be a kid thing!

This is my first year living in a house on an estate (moved from my city centre flat) so my first year buying sweets for the trick or treaters. I love Halloween so I bought massive bags of sweets.

The first kids I held the bowl out so they could choose their own sweets from the selection, but each of the kids grabbed massive handfuls for 5 or 6 bags of sweets each.

For the next kids, I held the bowl out again and said ‘one each please’. The kids didn’t listen and took big handfuls again, and then Mum looked a little embarassed and told the kids to put them back. I didn’t know if it was the done thing to give them a limit and didn’t fancy standing on the doorstep while the kids rifled through their bags trying to figure out which ones it was, so I told her not so worry about it.

The third lot, I put the sweets into their bags for them. One little boy asked if he could have another for his sister, so I chucked in an extra, and then he got half way down the drive and asked for another for his sister. I said ‘I gave you one for your sister’ and he said ‘that was for my big sister, this one is for my little sister’. I gave him a third, and he shouted to his friends ‘SCORE! GOT ANOTHER ONE’.

I loved trick or treating as a kid (my mum only ever let me go to neighbours we knew) so I don’t want to be miserable about it. I was just so looking forward to decorating and seeing all the kids in their costumes! I know it’s just kids and just sweets but the whole thing seems a bit sad, especially as I’m now out of sweets before it even gets going.

Do I go to the shop and buy more and enjoy the whole thing and chalk it up to experience, or do I stop answering the door and be grumpy for the rest of the night?

OP posts:

EggysMom · 31/10/2018 19:30

Lots of children here, most have to be encouraged to take more than one sweet. Two groups of grabby kids, both groups reprimanded and told to leave some sweets for others.

First year ever that we have run out of sweets and had to switch the lights off early.

Mirali · 31/10/2018 19:30

Ours have only taken 1 and their parents remind them to say thank you. Must be well trained!

Theimpossiblegirl · 31/10/2018 19:31

Loads here this year, including lots of groups of teens. All very polite.
I have pretty much run out of sweets now but just remembered I have some Celebrations in the cupboard for Christmas.

Notcontent · 31/10/2018 19:32

I have had a mix of polite and grabby kids tonight, but the main issue has been that a few very large groups came, so I ran out quite quickly despite having a good supply!

HannahHut · 31/10/2018 19:34

Literally just made a thread about the same thing, kids grabbing handfuls! We used to get one each as a kid.

Toofle · 31/10/2018 19:34

Pumpkin extinguished just now. Village, not posh. About 12-14 kids of various sizes , all polite, some with parents or older siblings.
No one said "trick or treat" - they all said "Happy Halloween".

hdh747 · 31/10/2018 19:34

We've had 3 lots. All super polite and I could only nag them into taking one more (way too many left) - they looked quite horrified that I was STILL waving the cauldren at them lol. And we live on the edge of a supposedly rough council estate...

GeraldineFangedVagine · 31/10/2018 19:34

This is my first Halloween not in London. In previous years we had eggs, flour, toilet roll and even dog shit thrown at our windows and most kids don’t even have a costume. This year I live in the country and had about thirty kids who have all been in proper costumes and have been polite to a fault. It’s been lovely.

oohyoudevilyou · 31/10/2018 19:35

Only had 4 lots round here so far. All took 1 mini bag each, thanked me nicely and wished me a happy halloween. The night is young though!

Girlicorne · 31/10/2018 19:36

We live in a little culdesac that noone knows is here, I bought Heroes and am eating them myself as we ve had noone. I ve been out with my two but they were under strict instructions just to take one :-) they were very polite!

yawning801 · 31/10/2018 19:36

I've just taken our pumpkin in, the kid I gave the rest of the sweets to looked like Christmas had come early!

Willow2017 · 31/10/2018 19:37

The sweet companies must be rubbing their hands in glee that the UK has bought into such rampant consumerism

Theres always one!
Halloween has been around a few years longer than sweet companies. Its just cheaper than giving out fruit and we cant give out nuts these days like we used to get as kids.

What people chose to do on our fav night of the year is not harming you one bit.

Blanchedupetitpois · 31/10/2018 19:37

I have to say the kids round here have been a dream. Have had three lots, they’ve all told a joke and then politely taken either a celebration or a small bag of Haribo. Haven’t had to remind even one not to take too much! They’ve all been lovely.

SharkShark · 31/10/2018 19:38

We had loads tonight. The first person took a massive handful which turned out to be 11 funsize chocolate bars . Fortunately everyone else was well mannered.

Lemontwist · 31/10/2018 19:38

We've had quite a lot tonight and every one has been lovely and polite. We've had "thankyou"s, "happy Halloweens" and "have a nice evening".
We do live just up the road from the primary school though and every one seems to be following the rule of only visiting houses that are decorated or have pumpkins.
Lots of people stop to chat jn the street and coo over the kids costumes

Josiebloggs · 31/10/2018 19:39

That sounds awful, we went out trick or treating for an hour and left out a bucket of sweets, passed well over a hundred trick or treaters and there was still 5 sweets left when we got back. Everyone here is very polite, lovely and makes an effort dressing up, I wouldn't do it if they were rude and grabby. It would take the fun out of it.

MrBirlingsAwfulWife · 31/10/2018 19:40

100 mini bags of Haribo gone!! Lots of groups of children mostly small but all beautifully polite.
I brought the pumpkins in as the sweets have all gone and no one has knocked since.
I'm not a great Halloween fan but actually really enjoyed seeing the street busy with kids and parents.

LilMy33 · 31/10/2018 19:40

This was my son a few years back when he was about 3/4, but in my defence I spent the whole time making him put them all back bar 1. I think I they all get a bit excited and usually don’t mean to be so grabby.

I got back home from trick or treating at 7 with my 2 and our bowl was empty despite having only been out an hour. No idea if people were that greedy or we’d had more visitors than usual. Had to turn out the lights and bring the pumpkins inside as I don’t have any more sweets. Oops.

lms2017 · 31/10/2018 19:41

Well tonight was a first for me was at my mums ...
Door goes 3 little ones in their outfits and a baby in arms with some sort of outfit on .
My mum makes bags of pick a mix up for the children and handed them out I heard my mum ask" will the baby eat them?" (Knowing she wouldnt but being polite)the mum replies no dont you have anything suitable for her ?. My mum replies no and the CF then replies with "oh she can have money!) I leapt out my chair and went to the door however mum was on it and told her to get lost pretty much 😮 I couldnt believe the woman!

Allergictoironing · 31/10/2018 19:42

4 lots for me too, ranging from 2 children to about 5. All had parents with them who waited at the bottom of the steps up to the front door bar a group of 4 young teens.

All just took one each (fun size Mars, Malteasers & Haribo bags) except one boy (near-ish neighbour) who asked how many so I told him 2. All were exceptionally polite, all said thank you and Happy Halloween, and the teenage girls were thrilled that one of my black cats put in an appearance at the window to observe what was going on.

I have skull & ghost lights hanging in the porch, which I'll take down if/when I run out of sweets. My only issue is that the Malteasers seem to be the favorite, and I was hoping to have a few of those left rather than Haribo!

Willow2017 · 31/10/2018 19:42

Lots of "Happy Halloween"'s, songs and jokes here too. Everyone said thank you too. Everyone dressed up even the teens looked fab a lot of effort gone in to thier make up and hair and costumes.

Love Halloween

Lavenderdays · 31/10/2018 19:43

Glad to report that we didn't have that experience here - most of the children took only one or two sweets each.

IHopeYouStepOnALegoPiece · 31/10/2018 19:43

We’ve had loads of ace kids here tonight! It’s been lovely!

I made conversation with a absolutely lovely 5 year old and he showed me his bucket and I said “wow! Such a lucky boy! Which ones your favourite?” When he said milkyway, I said “Me too!” And he gave me one because he had two and now I’m all soppy and can’t bare to eat this Milky Way because it’s just so sweet of him

karigan · 31/10/2018 19:45

I think I've cracked grabby children. I've been opening the door and my DD who is 4
and in costume (vampire-princess bat- not that she's indecisive!) has been holding the bowl. She loves it and it seems to dissuade the older kids from grabbing handfuls. All of them thanked her as well. She's very chuffed.

VillanellesBrownWig · 31/10/2018 19:45

90% not grabby here, 10% that were told to put some back

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