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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To take DS out trick and treating with chickenpox?

280 replies

Cherubneddy1 · 31/10/2018 11:52

DS 6 is more excited about Halloween than birthdays, Christmas, anything else. But he's woken up this morning covered in spots; clearly chickenpox.

WIBU to take him out trick and treating, on his own away from other children, if I kept him well back from people's' doors? He would genuinely be excited just to see houses all decorated ( and his sister could collect sweets for him.)

He is very well in himself.

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 31/10/2018 12:27

I wouldn’t be sending the sister to school either. She is almost certainly highly contagious right now.

She might be, she might not be. I don't think the advice is to keep them off on the off chance that they are contagious.

OP I would drive him round to see the decorations and have a bag of sweets for him ready at home.

Harpingon · 31/10/2018 12:27

Please don't. I Have an immune suppressed child. If she comes into contact with chicken poxs she has to have antivirals which make her so poorly she ends up in hospital. One of her little friends ended up in ICU with chicken poxs due to his illness. I can't even begin to understand people like you, it is soo selfish.

Stuckforthefourthtime · 31/10/2018 12:27

It's highly contagious (and if his sister hasn't had it before, she's highly likely to have it too). It's a shame for him, but completely inappropriate when there will be loads of other kids out and about and pregnant women and other vulnerable groups opening doors.

RandomObject · 31/10/2018 12:27

There definitely needs to be more education about CP. It is spread via the AIR - it's the same as taking someone out with the flu. You can't control its spread by just not getting close to people.

FWIW as well, it isn't even just immunocompromised and pregnant people at risk - my neighbour caught CP as an adult and it's a million times worse, it nearly killed him and he's a healthy youngish male.

HildaZelda · 31/10/2018 12:28

Oh ffs! Hmm Every bloody week on here. "Should I take my pox ridden child out to infect everyone else?"
NO! Keep them at home and stop being so bloody selfish Angry

Someonehelpmi · 31/10/2018 12:29

Please please please don't. Someone did something along those sort of lines last year, I was 6 months pregnant and contracted shingles. Worst time of my life luckily baby was okay. Please don't, it's not only other children you're putting at risk it's other vulnerable people such as the elderly, compromised immune systems, babies and pregnant women.

M3lon · 31/10/2018 12:29

Sometimes you NEED to leave the house - though getting milk isn't really one of them. That is totally different from taking a completely UNNECESSARY trip around a whole bunch of houses.

Again, your DD may or may not be infectious at the moment. Sending her to school when she is symptom free is reasonable because missing school is an actual problem for her education. Taking a potentially infectious child round the houses of lots of people when you there is a reasonable chance she is infectious is a genuinely awful thing to do.

Please keep both your children home.

SoupDragon · 31/10/2018 12:31

Someone did something along those sort of lines last year, I was 6 months pregnant and contracted shingles.

You can not catch shingles from chicken pox.

Ilovewheelychairs · 31/10/2018 12:31

Could you ring up a few of his friends and explain the situation? Then if they say it's okay (no immunosupression/pregnancy etc) could you drive him door to door to their houses? So they're prewarned and he isn't coming into contact with anybody who hasn't given permission?

Oysterbabe · 31/10/2018 12:31

Of course you can't take him, he needs to stay in until scabbed over.

LittleLionMansMummy · 31/10/2018 12:31

You'd be incredibly selfish if you do.

SparedByThanos · 31/10/2018 12:31

Puts on hard hat.

Personally I think if he's just walking down the street and not knocking on doors and you take measures to keep him away from everyone then it's fine.

You definitely don't need to keep your daughter off school either as someone suggested if she has no symptoms. That's ridiculous. Can you imagine how the country would grind to a halt every time someone took a day off after being in contact with someone else who was ill?

When my DD had chicken pox she got an infected spot on her eye and I had to walk through town with her in the buggy to get her to the GP. Perhaps I should have got someone to walk ahead of me shouting "unclean!" as we went.

I get that chicken pox, like all other viruses are dangerous for those with compromised immune systems but some of the comments on here are hysterical.

Marzipanface · 31/10/2018 12:31

I am immuno-suppressed and worry about chicken pox. However, I think keeping him away from other trick or treaters at doors, ringing the doorbell and picking up the sweets for him would make the risk of transmission highly unlikely.

MereDintofPandiculation · 31/10/2018 12:31

Op has made it very clear she was not going to take him knocking on people's doors. So why are so many people criticising her for planning to knock on people's doors?

Harpingon · 31/10/2018 12:32

To reiterate my daughter doesn't have to catch chicken pox to have to have the antivirals, just have any sort of contact with someone who is contagious. That is how dangerous it is for her. She would need them within 24 hours.

Gromance02 · 31/10/2018 12:33

It isn't worth the risk. Even if it is a tiny risk which it isn't. You could make someone incredibly ill or even kill them. How could you even think of it? How would you live with yourself? Just for the sake of one night of Halloween. Idiotic to even consider it.

anitagreen · 31/10/2018 12:33

If you turned up at my door or my grandparents door with a child who had chickenpox I'd be fuming with you, it can kill please don't be that parent

LordPickle · 31/10/2018 12:34

Why did you start a thread if you're not going to listen to what everyone is telling you, OP? Everyone agrees it would be selfish, irresponsible and potentially dangerous to take your son trick-or-treating tonight yet you keep trying to argue your point. Congratulations, you're an arsehole.

piscis · 31/10/2018 12:35

I would take him"door to door," or let him anywhere near other children

It is actually much more problematic for adults that haven't had chickenpox than for other kids.
Chickenpox is quite mild for kids, very nasty and quite dangerous for adults. My friend had serious complications when she had chickenpox at 30. She always said she nearly died...I got the jab this Monday, I am glad I did since you cannot trust that people are going to make the right decisions.

tolerable · 31/10/2018 12:36

YABU - thats a dreadful idea..Id have a quarintine sign requesting no trick or treaters either. .What you could do is have a wee party for him and sister. dress up,dook for apples ...make boo-nanas(half a banana ,give it chocolate drop eyes)..

jillowarriorqueen · 31/10/2018 12:37

Sorry, but YABVU. If he's well in himself, then do some apple bobbing and party games at home. Let him dress up and make toad in the hole for tea or something. But please don't even think about taking him door-to-door - or anywhere else, for that matter. It's not fair on other people. I can't actually believe that you need to ask, OP.

shouldwestayorshouldwego · 31/10/2018 12:38

No, go for a drive then curl up on sofa with sweets and a film.

Your dd is either immune, or caught it at the same time as ds and likely to pop out with spots any day, or will catch it from ds and will come out in spots in about 2 weeks. As you don't know which and can't keep her off school for two/ three weeks just in case I would just inform the school that she has been exposed - they will know if there is anyone immunocompromised. She will be most contagious just before spots come out so let anyone who is vulnerable know for the next few weeks (probably 10-15 days from now).

jillowarriorqueen · 31/10/2018 12:38

And yes to the sign to ask other kids not to knock too. Keeps them safe and at the same time doesn't rub his nose in the fact that he's not doing it.

mummabubs · 31/10/2018 12:40

@Cherubneddy1 it's airborne, so he wouldn't haven't to come into physical contact with anyone to pass it on. Hence why they say 10 days quarantine or until all spots have scabbed over. I know that it will be disappointing for him, but maybe plan a different kind of at home Halloween or ask your friends/neighbours if you can trick or treat them in a few weeks when he's better?

Please, please do not take him out. My DS caught chicken pox at 4 months old because someone had the attitude of oh well and he was really really ill with it. For people with vulnerable immune systems it can be fatal.

TwittleBee · 31/10/2018 12:41

Seeing this post has now made me really worry about opening the door later to trick or treaters!

Please don't take him, buy him a load of sweets and enjoy a good him with him but please don't be selfish and take him round door to door!

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