Not to offer a taste of my plate at a restaurant?

[chardonm]

Interested in hearing people's opinions. Am I a little rude in not offering people a taste of my plate?

I do it with DH, but when there is a group of say 5 people, I don't want 5 peoples' forks into my plate. Conversely I do not want to taste everyone's dish either.

Is this considered rude? Should one always offer?

We always share by default. Especially Indian/Thai/Chinese.

That way, we get to try a lot more dishes. I like variety in food, but don't have a big appetite. Others in my family also get variety but also get to eat more if they want it.

Some people just like doing this.

I don't force other people to share theirs though. Ex's family would have stabbed me with their forks if I tried this.

Ha ha, I just came on to see if some weirdo liked eating plates.
You meant food "off" the plate.

Oh it's a ridiculous assumption. I would not share with everyone, sounds disgusting.

Sharing is usually done putting plates on the middle. If food was served on our own plates, I would allow people to take a bit before anyone had started putting cutlery in their mouth.

I agree that it is not nice making children eat from your plate with your cutlery.

Tapas etc is different because it's in the middle of the table. It's like a buffet.

Maybe it's a middle class thing to not share?
No. It's an order your own thing and leave my food alone.

Hubby gets to my plate before I lift my fork and knife.
As soon as he starts going near your plate tell him to stop. Do it every single time. Ask him why should he have his meal and part of yours? If he wants what you are having then he needs to order his own and leave yours alone.

I’ve done a few work trips o/s and there’d always be someone who says I’m not very hungry shall we just get a few dishes to share. No.

In fairness if I’m out with friends I usually ask whether we do family style or not; I prefer sharing plates unless we are at a steakhouse or something.

Seems odd to me not to share plates though, if you have that option. Wouldn’t it be part of the experience to try everything and get everyone’s opinion?

Allergies/food intolerances aside that is

I hate when people Offer me their food for a taste as I don’t like sharing my food. I ordered what I wanted and I want it all (yes I’m aware that probably makes me a greedy heifer but so be it)

Forgot to add- this is a thing in my social circle and it’s drives me mad!

Stayed in a pub with several family members and we all got a 2 course meal 'included'. Before we ordered we agreed half of us would order starters and the other half would order puddings, then we'd share them around so everyone got some of both. We were all happy to do it as nine of us can ever eat all of a 3 course meal anyway - and we didn't have to pay extra. But I wouldn't ever suggest this outside of family or really good friends who I knew would be up for it.

I do this with my DH and children, my grandson only tastes my food .I'd never do it with non family

My wife and I offer each other a taste of each others food, and when we go out with our son we always offer him what we're eating in an attempt to widen his breadth of experience and hopefully get him to be a little more adventurous with his choices.

My mother always offers me some of her food - which I always politely decline. At some point that went from interesting to strange. I think its nice that she's still offering, but it doesnt appeal.

And I definitely wouldn't want to share food with other people. The exception to this is dishes meant for sharing, which are served in the middle with serving bowls.

And please, dont get me started on the hygene of fondues. For some reason whenever we go skiing someone want to go out for a fondue.

My family and I will offer each other stuff off our plates, but I wouldn't do it with friends.

Wouldn’t it be part of the experience to try everything and get everyone’s opinion?

Why do you NEED/WANT everyone’s opinion?

Wouldn’t it be part of the experience to try everything and get everyone’s opinion?

Surely it depends on what you want ‘the experience’ to be?

I want to spend time with people I love, choose something I know I’ll probably enjoy and enjoy eating it without worrying about losing half of it to everyone ‘having a taste’ or germs from people who put their fork in their mouth and then into my meal.

I would gain absolutely nothing from finding out what someone else thinks of my food!

I will happily share food (on the same fork) with OH as I already share bodily fluids with him. But anyone else, no chance. I wouldn’t get any joy from having a bit of everyone else’s food, what if I really like it? I’ve already chosen my meal so I can’t eat it anyway.

I’m vegan and everyone can just fuck right off from my precious food. That was my attitude though before I was vegan. I agree with Smithy and Nessa if you wanted what I have you should have ordered it!!

I wouldn’t get any joy from having a bit of everyone else’s food

What I was getting at is a bit different. There is no “my plate/your plate” with family-style dining and you have access to all dishes equally. I really like this and do it often when out with friends. If we have a veggie/vegan with us we are mindful of it and order things for them as well with separate serving utensils. Usually works out quite well (also easy when the bill comes). But can definitely understand it’s not really the done thing in many circles for whatever reason.

I offer and pass a portion on my unused fork to their plate. Once anyone keen has a bit I begin eating. This is the time that that other offerers are placing bits on my plate. Offerings are tiny. I don’t do this if we go to a specialty restaurant with tiny positions where I only eat one item though.

Portions! Tiny portions.

I’ve never eaten a plate.

Food sharing should be offered not just taken.

New boyfriend and i will happily swap bits of food so we both get a taste of the other's dinner or whatever. But we are new and nauseatingly loved-up, so its ok. In three years' time, i will probably stick a fork in his hand if he tries it!

For me it depends on the type of food (Indian/Chinese served on separate plates with serving spoons etc, mezze / things you just stab & eat or eat with hands), whether I have eaten my fill and who I’d be sharing with.

I was at a restaurant years back, with a woman I’d just met at a work event, and as the waitress was placing my meal on the table in front of me the CF woman said “I’ll have some of that” I was stunned, inwardly thinking she was a rude cow, but managed to say “if there’s any left” and gave her a cheesy smile.. luckily she dropped it but it made me quite uncomfortable, and I felt almost like I was the rude one for not handing my plate immediately over to her for her to take some.

My mum is bad for this lately too. Recently visited us (lives abroad) and drove me crazy, almost every time we were out she was discussing taking my food before I’d picked up a fork, or the classic “I can’t eat a whole dessert/sandwich/salad, I’ll have some of yours” - no you bloody won’t! It really made me angry as mum is aware of my health issues, frequently there’s only one or two items on a menu that I can eat.

But then if I’ve ordered food that is more easily shared or with the intention of sharing it, I have no issue and will offer it to others. For me it’s about offering it, rather than being TOLD that I will be giving away some of my meal.

You come near my plate you are getting stabbed in hand with a fork, no ifs no bugs, order your own food.

This is weird. I have never seen anyone do this with food. Sometimes with deserts, like if something looks really nice someone will offer a try of a piece. But not with normal food. Like fuck would I be sharing what I had picked with everyone anyway, if they wanted what I had, they should have ordered that!

It really depends on how close you are as friends. I don't think it's weird if you have close bond with a group of friends. Also, just because someone else hasn't heard of something or no one THEY know does or doesn't do something, pay absolutely no attention to that B.S. Sharing food (bar food or otherwise) is really a loving gesture in some cultures. You have to decide how close you feel to these people and you and only you can make that determination.