To dread turning 50.

[Luckyguess]

Really struggling with this. Is it really all down hill from here?

I am 50 next year. I have been invited to a style lab where the talks are about menopause, Botox, fillers and nutrition. 😂 I will still have three DC in the house when I turn 50 and my surprise youngest will only be 5! So I am focussing on staying fit and healthy and not focussing on age..... I have had a lot of death in my family with aunts and uncles all dying in the past 5yrs and it only my DM and an Auntie left..... but that’s part of life and I know people who lost there mums or dads in there teens so I feel grateful

I dread them all. Really hate the passage of time.
In reality though I'm having the best time ever. I need to learn to enjoy the now and not obsess about the (old and decrepit!) future. Although everything about the now is about staving off age and decrepitude!

All these no dc at home posts...dd2 will be 12 when I turn 50 😱😱

Rogueone Ok 12 seems rather independent compared to 5!

DD was 8 when I turned 50.

RollerJed my next one up will be 12 and he needs more support than my current 4 yr old!

I'm 50 this week🎉

My present to myself (early) was Running London marathon back in April

50 is as old or young as you want it to be

I wouldn't like to be 40or 50 again. I'm in my sixties and feel better than I've ever felt. I just wish there were more years ahead than there probably are

I think a lot of it depends on whether you're generally happy with the way your life is. 34 was the worst birthday for me - I was into my mid-30s, unhappily single, in a career that didn't fulfil me and the chances of ever having children (which was important to me) seemed to decrease with every birthday. That's what made me take a hold and do something positive. I took three months unpaid leave to do a university access course and started online dating.

Thirteen years later, I'm very happily married with a 10yo and 11yo. (My career took an absolute nose dive but you can't have everything!)

I think my point is, sometimes milestone birthdays (and 34 was one for me) can make you take stock of your life. For once, I felt in control and not just coasting.

It's my birthday today, I'm 51. I have greying hair, flabby bits and wrinkles that I have earned. I have fleeting moments were I do think about my own mortality BUT life is great! Fair enough I hate my job, but that's not an age related thing. Kids are grown up, I am solvent, I have a wonderful husband and I don't give two hoots what anyone says or thinks about me. Four years ago I achieved one of my lifelong ambitions and learned to ride a motorbike ( I do love my Ducati) and am doing stuff now that I could never have dreamed of doing when younger.
Age is just a number in your head, embrace life and enjoy it to it's fullest, we only get one chance.xxx

You've got to work out what is important to you and ask if turning 50 will stop you from doing the things that are important and makes you happy.

I was beautiful, but being invested in your appearance is never going to make you happy.

I'm 51, I haven't become invisible to Men, but having ongoing incontinence issues is stopping me from having a sex life. But, tbh, it's quite nice to not have that complication. I'm due to start HRT and that might bring back my sex drive. I'd like an old fashion companion, not a lover, ha ha.

It's about looking at the positives. I've just been seriously ill for three years, I'm on the mend and 'finding' myself again, but partly as a new me.

Family relationships, connection to community and nature and weightlifting, is what makes the inner me happy. My age or appearance won't take them away from me. When I was ill, 'nature' was watching animal programmes, my garden, wild birds, my cats and rabbits, but I could find joy in them.

Using words like Joy is often met with derision on here, but it's important at any stage of life.

The media make such a god awful fuss when a famous women turns 50, it's no wonder we can feel prickly about it.

All those headlines and articles about Nicole Kidman at 50, Julia Roberts at 50, Kylie at 50 and on and on. The only high profile bloke I can recall them making a big deal of turning 50 was Paul Weller where he was referred to as "The Modfather". He looked utterly shit but they didn't suggest he get botox or fillers or buy some crap to reduce the appearance of fine lines.

It's just misogyny, really.

Birthdays are good for you. The more you have the longer you live.

This programme from a couple of weeks ago made me feel better about getting older - Mary Beard talking to Emma Thompson. Emma is 59, Mary 63 I think, and they were talking about their changing experiences as women as they age.

www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b0bp1k6z/front-row-late-series-3-episode-6

I'm male. Turning 50 about 6 months ago was awful.