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Original poster

What age would you give your child alcohol at home?

97 replies

HillyMillylunchmunch · 29/10/2018 20:44

Now my daughter has turned 5 I have realised it is legal to give her alcohol at home!

I'm not planning to this weekend, but have no idea when I'll start. Literally no idea if I'll feel comfortable letting her have the odd weak shandy from 8 at christmas or a sip of Baileys at 10 or if I won't give her anything until she's a teenager. I doubt it'll be later than teenage...but again I really can't tell yet.

So I wondered what other people do with their children - do you offer a young child drink occasionally? Do you give a teenager drink if they ask for it with dinner? Or do you give in and let them have their first pint a fortnight before they turn 18 and nothing before then?

Link to drinkaware page on the law re legal drinking age at home to try and avoid lots of discussion about whether this really is the law or not

www.drinkaware.co.uk/alcohol-facts/alcohol-and-the-law/the-law-on-alcohol-and-under-18s/

OP posts:
RhinestoneCowgirl · 29/10/2018 21:32

Hmm, well my parents allowed me small glass of wine at home from about 15, but I still went out binge drinking with my friends as a teenager, so I don't really buy they 'introduce it at home and they won't be tempted to abuse it'

DS (12) had a sip of beer fairly recently, 'it tasted like water gone off' apparently.

Purplejay · 29/10/2018 21:35

My son is 12 and has only had small sips of ours on rare occasions when he asks. He mostly doesn’t like it and has asked how old I was when I started to like it! I don’t tend to buy alcopops.

I can’t imagine much changing in the next couple of years. I might let him have a small amount at home at Christmas if he asks from say 14. I won’t offer unless he asks.

FuckIHadToChangeMyNameForThis · 29/10/2018 21:35

Never. We don't keep alcohol in the house so we're not planning to buy a 6 pack when our daughter turns 5 just so she can have alcohol.

When she's legally old enough she can buy her own alcohol if she wants to.

brownjumper · 29/10/2018 21:35

12 beers a month? You don't say how old your ds is, previous poster whose name I can't remember!....but why would you encourage drinking alcohol?

londonrach · 29/10/2018 21:44

My parents were relaxed about alcohol growing up offering us watered down wine at 13/14/15. In fact i remember being given a tiny amount of full wine in our teens at xmas. My dsis and 1 refused after one taste. My parents regularly offered it to us if we were eating a meal as a family as teens. I went through uni tee total as really didnt understand why people drank to be silly as id in theory had access From teenager although we turned it down. Ok i like a glass now but i can say i have never been drunk. My dsis the same. Think 5 abit young though.

GoldenBuns · 29/10/2018 21:48

Yes, I also had a 'progressive' parent - glasses of shandy, wine, sugar lumps dipped in brandy... I don't have the healthiest relationship with alcohol and dp is the same. One side of my family has many alcoholics on it and I worry about that.

My ds is nearly 13 and dd nearly 15 - they have had the odd sip here and there, but no more.

Petitepamplemousse · 29/10/2018 21:50

Modern research shows the earlier they are introduced to alcohol, the more likely they are to develop alcoholism. Certainly holds true for my own family, sadly.

Unihorn · 29/10/2018 21:50

We used to have weak shandies or spritzers from about 10 in my house, and I often used to sneak a sip of my older brothers' beers or alcopops. I drank far less than my friends growing up at house parties and the like. We'll probably follow a similar pattern without children when they're old enough.

maddjess · 29/10/2018 21:59

5!?!? Really? I thought it was a typo

Lazypoolday · 29/10/2018 22:00

I can't imagine giving even watered down wine to an 8 year old. Shocked that so many people on here were given it as children Shock My DD is 7 and if she asked for a sip of someone's alcohol I would say no. Maybe around 12 or so I'd let her, but literally just a sip. The odd glass of wine with a special meal maybe when she's a teenager, it is a part of life after all, but I think too young could be damaging, as in they will get a taste for it!

Unihorn · 29/10/2018 22:04

Sips are unlikely to cause any harm though, and given that many adults find the taste of alcohol disgusting, it's very unlikely that a 7 year old would "get a taste" for watered down wine.

Petitepamplemousse · 29/10/2018 22:06

I did. I remember liking alcohol when given sips of it as a child. It did give me a taste for wine.

MrsStrowman · 29/10/2018 22:09

I was allowed a snowball on my 13th birthday ( I was born in the eighties), I took one sip, it was disgusting. Probably from about fifteen I'd be allowed maybe one bottle of light beer if it was a special occasion or a glass of champagne at New year or a wedding, by 16 my parents were more relaxed and I could have a few drinks, but nothing strong, not to be drunk and only if it was an event I wouldn't have just been at home drinking on a Friday night. I did start going clubbing about 16 and obviously drank there and my parents knew. When I was eleven or twice I might've stuck my finger be in the head on my dad's beer and he'd swat me away but I wouldn't really be told off, but not at five.

MyOtherProfile · 29/10/2018 22:10

Dd isn't interested and thinks all alcohol smells like nail varnish remover so she doesn't ever have any. She's 11. Dd is 13 and has had sips of what we have since he was about 6. Now when we have wine I pour him a little glass and we talk about what kind of wine it is and how it tastes. He has sips of his dad's beer too and again they talk about the different tastes. I dont want to make alcohol a big thing so we have avoided the forbidden fruit thing and try to teach a respect for alcohol.

JustDanceAddict · 29/10/2018 22:10

About 14 for a sip/taste or a small glass in special occasions. NHS guidelines say 15 for first drink due to developing brain but I’m sure the odd try of my cocktail on holiday or small champagne at family do won’t kill off too many brain cells.
Dd is 16 and has barely had any alcohol so far. A lot of her peers get pissed every weekend so the longer she can not drink, the better.

DarkYearForMySoul · 29/10/2018 22:11

Partly French family and we do the ‘little bit of wine mixed with lots of water’ from age 7 if we’re giving wine with a meal. But we rarely drink so it doesn’t happen that often, maybe once a fortnight.

Both DH and I were both brought up like this and now have fine relationship with alcohol, can take it or leave it. Weirdly we both grew up with full alcohol cabinets in the house, we have lots of bottles, they just rarely get touched.

drinkygin · 29/10/2018 22:13

Mine are 9, 13 and 15 and all have a very weak champagne and lemonade with their christmas lunch. It’s more lemonade than champagne to be honest. Eldest has he odd sip here and there to tast my wine but nothing else.

JustDanceAddict · 29/10/2018 22:17

I loved snowballs and def drank them at functions as a young teen!!

BrokenWing · 29/10/2018 22:17

Ds is nearly 15, currently thinking is minimum of 16. That may change over the next year or so but only older not earlier. He's had a couple of sips but never a glass of his own.

OkMaybeNot · 29/10/2018 22:19

Why would you even want to?

It's legal, not a legal requirement!

BarbarianMum · 29/10/2018 22:22

When they want it? So watered down wine with special meals from 7/8, sips of beer etc when asked for. I'm from a part Spanish/Italian family none of whom are big drinkers and the British attitude to children and alcohol (and alcohol in general actually) just baffles me.

SnipSnipMisterBurgess · 29/10/2018 22:25

I’m completely bemused by the ‘age 5’ and assumed it was a typo for 15 Confused

A bit like driving at the speed limit, it’s not a target. My own rules would be to reduce the opportunity and temptation at home, not to facilitate it.

SavageBeauty73 · 29/10/2018 22:28

Mine are 16 and 13 and never tried alcohol. My exDH is an alcoholic and seems to have totally put them off.

Oliversmumsarmy · 29/10/2018 22:29

DD tried it but didn't like it so doesn't drink at all. DD drives and a lot of the time is on the other side of the bar. So rarely has the time.
I don't drink at all as alcohol, even the tiniest amount makes the room spin.

Ds 16 I don't think will drink either.

Dp drinks and ds doesn't like the way it affects him.

I could not imagine giving a child of 5 alcohol.

BigChocFrenzy · 29/10/2018 22:33

I suspect suddenly allowing a can or 2 at 15 would be a problem - both too late and too early, IYSWIM
even age 10-12
The problem is that it could taste really nice then and a full portion would go down smoothly

That thimbleful I was given from 4-5 was early enough to teach me that alcohol is not that interesting and just tastes harsh after a couple of tiny sips
but the tiny amount and only weekly wasn't enough to cause harm.

I wonder if the French and Spanish have adult binge-drinking to the same extent we do ?
Their consumption is as high, iirc, but more spread out and with meals.