To get obsessed so easily?

[Ansumpasty]

This is more of an ‘am I being abnormal’ rather than unreasonable. Just seeing if anyone can relate!

All my life I’ve felt things very strongly and get easily obsessed with things. If I liked a boy in school, he’d be all I thought about, etc. I loved the circus as a child and would go all the time and sob when it left and dream of running away and joining them, etc.
As an adult, I find myself getting obsessed with things/people/places more than others do. I will watch a series on Netflix and become obsessed with it, often watching everything my favourite character is in, researching things about it and feeling really upset when it’s finished or a character dies. I’ve had the death of a character upset me so much that it’s literally ruined my evening and been on my mind for days.

I’ve read books set in specific places/countries and then have to read others set in the same place, research the country and plan on visiting, etc.

There’s a place I go on holiday to quite regularly that I feel this strongly about. I feel upset to the point of tears when we have to leave, bring silly things like rocks I find there home and watch any programme etc about it.
I’m ‘normal’ in every other way, with a happy marriage and children and nice friends. Just wondering if anyone else feels this strongly about silly things and has these adult obsessions?
What do you get attached to?

It seems to be a coping mechanism my mind uses to not focus so much on the feelings of depression or anxiety.

Same here, thinking about the topic I'm obsessed with is like a comfort blanket, even if it is a really depressing topic like climate change.

Yes I'm exactly the same. Become the obsessed with shows, movies, the actors. Research everything to do with them. I always have this thing where if I like some actresses hairstyle of outfit, I want to have it. It's really bizarre. Also have dyspraxia.

Hmmm, good to know!

@n0ne haha, I am not the screamer 😂 I’m emotional, but not THAT emotional

I'm like this and have been since I was a child! Usually tv shows, books or musicians. When I'm in the grips of one of my obsessions it can really dominate my thoughts and like others I can spend hours on the internet reading about it or watching things about it.

@HouseOnTheLake

That’s really interesting and makes sense, actually! It usually is when I’m anxious or down about something that I can’t help but become fixated on something/someone. Could quite possibly be a coping mechanism. Well, at least reading about Aiden Turner’s favourite food and the town he was born in is better than becoming an alcoholic

Yes I do this too, it's just something pleasant to think about to distract me from the fact that the car insurance is overdue to be paid etc

@incendio Exactly!

Thankfully, my husband doesn’t seem to care and will even humour me and go along with it.

It’s pretty nice of him as I wouldn’t appreciate it if he had some temporary infatuation with an actress. He did draw the line on us actually going to Afghanistan after me reading a few novels set there, though

Op I am like this too and have been worrying about it lately. I too use it as a coping mechanism. I suffer terribly with anxiety and when I can't sleep at night or worrying ect, I will 'daydream' about my current obsession to distract myself. I'm so glad I'm not the only one.

Yes, you've described me perfectly. Waiting for ASD assessment.

Like a pp, I'm obsessed about a place a spent my childhood holidays in, I just go there every year with dcs. It's only a fortnight & never feels long enough. I couldn't ever live there but I look up house prices on Rightmove, follow various FB group pages and hashtags.

When people ask where I'm going on holiday, I wax lyrical about how magical this place is. I see it as an outlet back to my happy family memories etc - if I'm feeling down, I just do a google image search to cheer myself back up.

Yes, another one here.

@practicallyperfectinmyway That’s exactly how I feel. I too look on Rightmove, am on Facebook groups and look at hashtags. I follow the weather on my phone app every day and sometimes when I’m trying to relax, I close my eyes and imagine I’m there. Would be funny if it’s the same place!

I am not like this but I have a few friends that are. They are all academics and really able to hold an interest in a particular topic long after most people would have been distracted by something new.

I'm actually a bit jealous of people who get obsessed. It's like a passion that I don't often feel, so obsess away! (P.s I used to get obsessed in my teens bit I've lost that now!)

My grandma is obsessed with Bob Marley, she has learned to use a tablet and had the Internet installed so she can research everything she can and watch his videos on repeat, she has every book about him, her house is covered in anything and everything with his face on and she talks about him constantly. It's the latest in a long line of obsessions, but this has definitely lasted the longest.

@needsanewname You Grandma sounds amazing!

Yup, this is me. I particularly get obsessions strongly when I'm really going through a bad spell of mental health - so when I had a relapse a few years ago, I was obsessed with the series Sherlock (and to a lesser extend, Benedict Cumberbatch). Once I feel better, my obsessions soften slightly, but if I get an obsessive thought like 'must see what that person I remember from years ago is doing' I end up on an internet wormhole.

I guess it's a coping mechanism for me. In fact my relapse his year has been the first time I've not been super obsessed with something or a hobby etc. In the past it's been the gym, wish it was again!

Seeing people say it's a coping mechanism for them has made me realise it's probably the same for me! Looking back it is always when I'm going through a hard time that I find a new obsession or I'll slip back into an old one. And it explains why I always had an obsession on the go as a teen because life always feels difficult at that age!

I suppose it's better for my health than turning to drugs 

I am the same and do not think I am on the spectrum.
I love researching and planning holidays which is at least realistic, but escape into major day dreaming about all sorts of things. I would not be at loss with how to spend my millions if I won the lottery for example, it's been planned out for years in minute detail.

I'm exactly the same and autistic.

Yes me down to a tee! Have been like it my whole life. A silly teenage crush for me would mean being utterly obsessed. Liking a boy band for me would feel like I'd want to join some sort of cult.

I'm the same now, places, people etc. Total and utter life engulfing obsessions.

You've just described me too.

Have you ever read a list of 'ADHD in females' traits?

Hyperfocus is one of them. And I basically tick every ADHD in girls box. Not too dramatically but it's there.

I'm not fussed to bother getting a diagnosis etc. As I'm a happy mid-30s wife and mother. Held down a job for 12 years etc.

But I see similar traits in my daughter so I do try and stay aware of it as I wish I'd had more support with my organisation as a tween/teen as I could've achieved better at school with a little support. She's only young and very bright and doing great, but I found it hard at GCSE/A Level to stay organised. And wish someone had helped me there.

@Ansumpasty oh she is, there's not another woman like her on this planet. She's my favourite human.

I'd love to take her to Jamaica but she would probably abandon me there and run off with a member of Bob's family.

Both my DH and DD are like this and both are autistic. They tend to become obsessed with something (hobby, sport or tv program) and they will do it over and over but then all of a sudden they will drop it and not be interested again. Apparently it is an autistic trait.