To not dedicate my novel to my wife?

[Jezebelz]

I've recently heard my first novel is going to be published.

My wife has been very supportive and encouraging of my writing... but has shown zero interest in the story or reading the book.

One of the characters is even based on her!

I even printed it off and left it by her side of the bed but she just shoved it in a drawer and forgot about it.

I've reminded her to read it a few times and she just says 'I will' then doesn't.

AIBU to not dedicate a book to someone who won't even read it?

We are both female btw.

How about a vague 'dedicated to all those who have supported me' etc?

Maybe she doesn't want to read about herself. I don't think I would ... whole can of worms and all that!

I wouldn't no. Very odd that she doesn't care enough to read it.

You say she has been supportive and encouraging, seems you're annoyed that she doesn't want to read your written version of her character. Fair enough. Put in a general thanks if you feel that strongly about it.

Congratulations on publishing your first novel!

I think it depends on whether you think the support your wife has offered is worthy of a dedication. Might it be that the novel itself, while it's obviously very good as it's being published, just isn't her personal cup of tea? Is there anyone else you think has offered more support? Could you dedicate it to more than one person?

If she's been supportive in every way except by reading it, I would still include her in the dedication.

a dedication isn't obligatory is it??

Congratulations! I'm surprised that she doesn't want to read it, but I wouldn't leave her out of the dedication if she has been supportive, I think it would look like a snub.

I’m never sure what the point I’d dedicating a book is, I usually read the ‘comments’ section in novels but some of them are so twee and thanking everyone & his dog, they can practically be a short story in themselves. It can all seem a bit self indulgent. Is there really any need to dedicate it to anyone.

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Why not let her know you're disappointed she hasn't read it because it means a lot to you?

Do you go to her workplace to see what she has achieved? Could it be that if something is "work" she doesn't think of it as part of your home life?

'To all those who supported the creation of this book. You know who you are.'

Congratulations!!

Not sure I’d want to read about a character based on moiself either. 🤔

Can you imagine the glacial freeze if she doesn’t appreciate the characterisation?

It's not obligatory to make a dedication.

My sister has been hugely helpful, reading and re-reading drafts, offering advice on the story and being genuinely interested in it. Part of me would like to dedicate it to my sister but it seems strange not to do it to my wife.

Just because she hasn't read your book doesn't mean she hasn't been supportive!

I think if she's picked up the slack around the house while you've been busy working on your book then she has supported you, in giving you extra time to work on it. She might be waiting to read it in book form, rather than a big heavy manuscript

Hmmm yes maybe she just doesn't want to read about herself!! (It wouldn't be obvious to anyone but her).

Who would you like to dedicate the book to, if anyone? Congratulations!!

Just because she hasn't read your book doesn't mean she hasn't been supportive!

Perhaps, but it’s pretty shit of her.

My sister has been hugely helpful, reading and re-reading drafts, offering advice on the story and being genuinely interested in it.

You surely don’t expect your wife to offer advice on a book featuring a character based on her?

Perhaps she doesn't want to read in case she doesn't like it. Giving bad feedback can be hard and it's unfair to think because u like ur novel, everyone else will.

May be she has read it, thought it was crap and doesn't want to have the 'well, what did you think?' discussion.

@Oakenbeach - Not really. Maybe she doesn't want to read about a character based on herself. Who knows, maybe she fears she won't like what she reads and lead to arguments?

I wouldn’t want to be written about. I know it’s only a character you have based her on, but it would make me feel incredibly uncomfortable, even knowing other people who knew me too.

Maybe she's been too busy picking up the slack in the house to read it, in which case it'd be a real kick in the teeth to dedicate it to someone else.

I think the wife is getting off a bit easy here. If it is because a character is based on her she should say so. Why wouldn’t you read a spouses book unless it was a technical manual or the storyline is in some way offensive to her. Is it?

I find the wife’s behaviour odd.

Sorry just seen you mentioned your sister! It does seem strange but it also sounds true 🤷🏻‍♀️. How would your wife feel do you think?

My husband does triathlons, marathons, iron mans and all that jazz. I support him in the fact that he does a lot of training and I don’t have as much help with the children but I don’t take any interest tbh. I go and watch sometimes. I might think blimin cheek I did a lot of work behind the scenes but the truth is I don’t show any actual interest.

Speak to her about it!