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To feel sorry for teachers because of some parents

168 replies

abacucat · 27/10/2018 12:37

I suspect the worst part of teaching is some of the parents. Parents who believe their child can do no wrong, parents who bring their child up to be totally entitled, parents who always minimise and make excuses for their child's bad behaviour. It must be frustrating for the teachers.

OP posts:

formerbabe · 28/10/2018 14:37

In my DC's old school, there was one particular mum who HAD to speak to the teacher EVERY morning. I would often overhear it was mostly totally unnecessary and parents who might have had a legitimate reason to speak to the teacher had to wait for her to finish dealing with this particular mum.

I do feel sorry for teachers...I think it must be a nightmare!


Piggywaspushed · 28/10/2018 14:40

Sounds like someone not a teacher has been to Finland and wants to apply their models (or bits thereof) in a country with neither the funding nor the tsructure to support it...


medusa83 · 28/10/2018 15:22

Maybe I am a bit weird, but I actually really love parents' evenings and always come away feeling quite satisfied, on the whole. The parents of the pupils who are the most challenging don't turn up, and it's lovely to complement the child and see how proud the parents are.


MaisyPops · 28/10/2018 19:54

I love parents' evenings too.
It's a privilege to be able to put faces to names and to tell parents and carers how their child has been progressing. I love being able to share their lightbulb moments or pieces I've loved marking.

Even when there's some negatives, most parents are thankful for the support and keen to support us to help the child achieve.

Some of my worst moments with parents have been at parents' evenings but most parents who see you handling such nasty and rude individuals are so lovely and supportive. One year some parents smiled with sympathy when I was dealing with a particularly nasty and misogynistic man and they got a member of SLT to help cover me. Their kindness meant a lot.


yesyesyess · 28/10/2018 19:56

From reading threads here I'm convinced a lot of parents are uneducated entitled shits so I sympathize a lot with teachers


WithAFaeryHandInHand · 28/10/2018 19:58

Hmmmm I don’t know it it would be THE most annoying part... I think all of teaching sounds horrendous. Obviously rewarding too, but oh sweet baby Jesus, not for me at all. They’ve got a seriously tough gig in this poor excuse for a country.


student26 · 28/10/2018 20:18

I’ve had a parent stand in my classroom in front of the entire class one morning and scream at me how disgusting a tip my classroom was and how it was all my fault her P3 son could not find his PE kit. (If he had left it in the tub with everyone else’s like he was told to every week then this would not have been a problem). Had to get Head to come and make her leave. Another parent ranted how the school should pay for the expensive earrings her daughter lost one day. Or the parent who stormed into my class shouting that I’d spoken to her daughter in the most disgusting way. I told her daughter to not take things off my desk that were not hers. These are some parents that stand out to me.
On the other hand I had one parent tell me how much their son had come on in confidence and how much he had enjoyed being at school with me as a teacher. And another one who told me that her daughter absolutely loved coming into school each day because of her teacher. These are the moments I try to remember. It’s hard sometimes to know that I am doing a good job due to those few who find it hard to be civil and have a quiet conversation with me if something isn’t right. But the majority of parents, just like the majority of teachers, only want the best for their children. It’s just a few that spoil it for others.


Riversleep · 28/10/2018 20:23

I think the worst part of teaching is when you’re in the middle of a lesson, need to write something on the board and all your board markers are running out. So annoying.
I absolutely agree Grin We always have cheapo markers too! I once got downgraded on an observation because all
my board markers ran out Blush


Bananacakes · 28/10/2018 20:29

As a parent I genuinely cannot see the point in parents evening. It’s also always on a night I can rarely go. (Secondary) But when I do go it seems such a waste of time. My kids at secondary are doing well and quite bright, not in trouble, so it seems to be 10 x 5 mins of yes she’s quiet, lovely child doing well. I can’t see the point. With my troublesome son obviously it was useful. But it’s frustrating to be seen as disinterested parent if you can’t attend but when you do it’s pointless. Surely the teachers think it’s daft?
Primary it’s different. I can see the point.


MaisyPops · 28/10/2018 20:43

I don't think it's daft (but then I'm a core subject so don't have to speak to 200 y7s and their parents like an IT/drama teacher does when they see them once a fortnight or something silly).

One of the nicest feedbacks I got from a parent was that it made their day how well I knew their quiet child and made their child feel appreciated. Sometimes I think quiet children who do the right thing can get overlooked (often unintentionally) and parents' evenings can be a lovely opportunity to share strengths and areas to develop and give some well deserved praise.


Bananacakes · 28/10/2018 21:07

@maisypops that’s lovely. I always feel sorry for the teachers as it’s such a long day and I hadn’t thought about it that way 😊


LJdorothy · 28/10/2018 21:50

You've just listed all the reasons I'm leaving in June. I have loved teaching but I can't do it all anymore. That march on Saturday had a huge turnout because so many teachers are feeling the same (apart from sunshine's 'family members' obviously).


tillytrotter1 · 28/10/2018 22:16

His parents never go to parent teachers, his mum gloated when she told me this - he does no homework and I think the school are offering more support to the parents.

Why is the school wasting resources supporting dead-beat parents? It isn't going to make a difference to that type and is taking resources away from where it could do good.
Schools have to waste far too much time on 'support' for social rather than educational reasons.
As an escapee from the chalkface my favourite was a couple who came to Parents's Evening, their daughter was a real little madam,14 or so, half way through our discussion his phone rang. Without a word he got up, walked over to a window and proceeded to arrange a golf game, on return he tried to demand that I repeat what I'd told his wife. He subsequently complained to the Head about my refusal, I had been rude and his call had been very important, When I reminded him of his transport arrangements and tee times he backed off.


tillytrotter1 · 28/10/2018 22:27

I used to detest internal inspections, ie me as the Head of Maths being assessed by a PE teacher whose face fitted with the Acting Head and she'd been made a Senior Teacher, a Golden Girl. The lesson involved using compasses to construct triangles etc, sure you all remember! I was criticised because I got them to do it more than once, no matter how I talked about the need for accuracy etc she marked the lesson down.
Off to bed, I could write a book about the deterioration in the profession and I understand from younger acquaintances that it's got far worse.


medusa83 · 28/10/2018 22:49

For me the worst part of teaching is the endless marking. The thought of working through that pile is soul-destroying. Although once you start it isn't so bad. Everything else I love. I enjoy my job and gain immense satisfaction from both the teaching and management side (Head of 6th). It is very time-pressured, but if you are in a school with high staff morale and a positive, supportive SLT, then it is a great job.

I haven't always loved it- for the first 2 years I found it incredibly difficult, particularly managing behaviour (I worked in one of the top 20 most deprived wards in the UK). But I refused to quit and now love every minute, dealing with challenging, shouty parents included!


CaptSkippy · 28/10/2018 22:51

I wonder if the 80/20 rule applies to this situation. Like 20% of the percent create 80% of the complaints.


CaptSkippy · 28/10/2018 22:51

That should be 20% of the parents creating 80% of the complaints and rude behavior.


Thisreallyisafarce · 29/10/2018 09:07

As a parent I genuinely cannot see the point in parents evening. It’s also always on a night I can rarely go. (Secondary) But when I do go it seems such a waste of time.

I see it as an opportunity to meet and talk to the closest relatives of the children with whom I spend hours every week, to make sure everyone is on the same page with regards to progress. That's all. Can't see how that would be a waste of time, but if you feel that way, I don't think you have to go.

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