To wonder how representative MN is of real life...

[Oakenbeach]

Although there’s a huge range of posters on here, I get the impression it’s heavily skewed towards the professional middle classes.

Funny, I thought the exact opposite. There seem to be a proliferation of people who are vitriolic about anyone with first World problems and who constantly moan about not being able to afford Boden (or buying Boden on sake or second hand). The only people I know who think of Boden as aspirational are pretty poor. No one with any money think of it as anything to aspire to wearing.

I wouldn't know Boden if I feel over it.

*fell

I think it's polarised as a couple of people said. I work with vulnerable people and think there's a high proportion of people with crippling social anxiety and life limiting disability using MN but I imagine that's because the forum is a valuable support for them.

I’d never heard of Boden before joining MN. Still never actually looked at it.

people are more honest here as it’s anonymous. For example, in the transgender/self ID debate, most people in the real world present the super accepting face of public understanding, but in the anonymous internet world they can express concerns about women’s spaces, trending of children, trans women in female sports etc.. Mumsnet is a pretty accurate representation of the real world, (instead of the polite public face)

I’m old and Ive been posting since 2012 and lurked for several years before that so I feel I can deffinitely say that it is fairly representative of real life.

Ive moved around the country a lot due to my career so Ive lived in the wealthy south, the wealthy north, the wealthy midlands, the poor south, the poor north and the poor midlands. Now Ive been lucky enough to be accepted into these different communities and it is startling how each one thinks that their reality is the norm.

The Cheshire group who spend £10k on one holiday, the Staffordshire group who cant afford a holiday - ever - and everything in between and both groups said things like “well, everyone’s struggling” or “everyone’s going to Mairitius darling.” It’s the echo chamber/birds of a feather situation.

I think the SEN/Autism/Anxiety people naturally gravitate online because support is offered when commonly, its not in real life due to stigma.

I agree about the Jeremy love on here though, it seems nobody votes Tory.

Transing of children

Loads of posters on here seem to support Tory policies, at least over the last couple of years. I don't see how anyone can miss them.

I think there's a good cross section viewing MN, but posts are skewed towards extremes.

this

If you look on the education forum you'd have the impression that everyone is sending their child to a top, fee-paying / grammar school. Yet that is a forum for the educationally anxious. Statistically the vast majority of MN children no doubt happily attend a state comprehensive, as a result of which the average MN contributor doesn't bother involving themselves with these anxiety-riven threads.

Define "real life" though. My "real life" isn't the same as the OP's real life, or anyone else's real life. The life of a middle class SAHM who shops in Waitrose and has kids in private school is just as real as that of a single mother in an inner-city tower block scraping by.

I suppose it depends what your usual social circle is?

Compared to mine which I'd mostly describe as working and lower middle class professionals in their early thirties MN seems to have a lot more upper middle class and upper class people and the opinions they bring with them than I come across in my RL.

Using Boden as an example, no one in my social circle could afford to buy their clothes from Boden-like priced retailers (I had to look it up, didn't know the brand...) even though they work full-time.

Platypusspie yes there was an exodus to the other place after penis beaker i think. MN is much more National/International now whereas it used to be South East focused.

I support some Tory policies. It doesn’t mean I am ‘Tory’, any more than someone who supports compassion to animals supports the BNP.

I consider myself fairly liberal but do find some of the views on here totally extreme and never meet people like that in RL. No one will admit to voting Brexit or Tory yet clearly a lot of people do.
I also find the vitriol directed to Christianity and simple RE lessons in school extreme. In my experience people are falling over themselves to get their children into Church schools and then begging for the parts of Mary & Joseph in the Nativity play.

I think there's a good cross section viewing MN, but posts are skewed towards extremes
I agree.
If you go on school threads you could be forgiven that the dominant types are:

1. parents who need to know which 3+ and tutor to get in order for them to get the right prep school to send them to Oxford or Cambridge. How the world will end because their child got a 7 in their year 10 mocks and they don't understand how such a thing could have happened.
2. people who will routinely minimise poor behaviour in schools, encourage their DC to ignore any rule they don't fancy (justifying is as 'I don't teach my child blind obedience'), witter on about how there's a MN conspiracy where all the teacher defenders worship at the altar of schools etc. People will suggest going to formal complaint without even speaking to the teacher, demand a meeting with the head, go to ofsted etc are all thrown around as advice.

Reality - most children go to state schools, most children are great and do their best, most parents are really supportive, most parents will call for a chat if they have an issue or want to raise concerns. Generally schools and parents get on just fine and parents/children are a delight to work with

Depends what real life is. Most of them earn less than I do (laughing as I type - not that income relates to class particularly). People obviously have to be comfortable with reading and writing and although many may not realise it not all people in the UK are nor with the English language so immediately the fact it is on line means you will not get those who cannot read or speak English for a start and of course most people aren't male so that bit iof real life is excluded too and most are youngish (except for me) parents so again that is just a section of people.

I think we get a variety of people on here and it's nice we can hear about the lives of others - some are inspired by the women who earn £1000 a day and others are helped to realise how awful life can be if you are very sick or ill or impoverished. You "meet" people you might not meet in off line life.

whereas it used to be South East focused

I think it still is. Some posters don't think there is a wider country out there. They base all opinion on what happens in the Capital and South East.

Maybe part of the reason it seems skewed towards the middle class is the brutal responses to those who post with spelling, grammar or syntax errors. As a fully paid up member of the professional middle class it makes me wince as well but it seems a bit mean to point it out so directly if the meaning remains clear. Sometimes it smacks of a teacher with a red pen and a "see me after school" attitude

It seems there is definitely a richer than average demographic on here. Lots of assumptions like those mentioned by other posters (my own personal favourite is, "to save money, stop using your tumble dryer and hang your clothes on your washing line", just assuming that everyone has both a tumble dryer and a garden!).
Lots of SAHM who genuinely don't realise that being a SAHM is a real privilege. SAHMs with nannies and cleaners. SAHMs who don't think that housework is part of the job. I know very few people who SAH for more than maternity leave - not because they all love their careers, but just because it takes two incomes to get by. Also, a lot of women on here seem far more possessive than the women I know in real life, and don't like their partners going out for a drink with their friends. In my social circle, its perfectly normal for both people in a relationship to have a night out with the lads/girls without it causing an issue.

Really, MN should be renamed Emetophobes Anonymous never have I ever come across so many in one place. Actually, never met one IRL. Its just another word someone learned and keeps on using because they like a label.

Same as hyperemesis gravidarum - no love, feeling a bit queasy doesn't mean you the same illness as the Duchess of Cambridge. In all my years, I have only ever met one person ONE! who was hospitalised with morning sickness! ONE!

It isn't representative of the population as a whole because it can't be. In order to be a regular poster on here, you've got to read and write English to a good standard and be confident using it, and you need enough internet access. Ie you're not on a bundle that gives just enough minutes for job applications and kids homework. You also need time to post and engage. Not everyone ticks all these boxes, and in fact if they were a venn diagram there'd be a lot of overlap. That said, there can be a lot of diversity.

But stereotypically, everyone's kids are either gifted or have SN, or sometimes both. There's a lot of competitive orthorexia. Everyone is either wadded or skint, the middle ground isn't much represented on the finance threads. All the unmarried couples have extensive legal protections in place, no poster would ever rehome a pet, and nobody's neighbours can park for shit! MN posts are perhaps not entirely representative on these subjects!

Ooh yes a lot of emetophobia here too. And misophonia!

I know a few cases of active MNers who posted utter cobblers about themselves on here. Kind of amusing. I still think most people are truthful, but we each have our own idea what is truth.

damekindness
I hate grammar and spelling police on forums. My mental rule is the point at which someone resorts to "haha you didn't use an apostrophe/ well you can't even spell / you may have used dialect grammar but it's just wrong" is really a sign that there's no point engaging.
Sort of like the Hitler rule on forums.