AIBU to be a little annoyed with my friends?

[NightOwl10]

I'd arranged to go out with my friends a couple of days ago for my birthday. It was a pretty low key thing, I've just gotten over a bad cold so we were just going to do the Halloween escape room, and I was really excited because I had to move up to Scotland to be closer to DPs family instead of in London where my whole life used to be so I this would be the first time I've seen them or been back to London in almost 6 months.

Anyway, the two friends I was going out with turned up to the escape room drunk even though I'd begged them not to drink since we wouldn't be allowed it. And of course, we weren't allowed in. So they said since they'd been pre-drinking already they wanted to do a bar crawl and then go to a night club. I agreed to it and I tried to be optimistic, but we'd spoken about not having a drinking night out and they'd all said they felt too old for that now anyway.
So, at the bar, every drink I bought for myself they took away and drank for themselves because they said I was a lightweight at uni and they didn't want to have to look after me, even though 1) that was 2 years ago now and 2) I was always the one looking after them. I told them I really didn't want a drinking night out still but i'd also come all that way (10hr drive) and I wanted to catch up with my friends. They kept saying I was boring and that they wanted a night out so they were having one, but they kept taking my drinks so I remained sober the entire night. One of them tried to buy MD so I told them no, it's not safe, not legal and since they insisted and it was 3am at that point and I had to drive to the other side of london to see my parents later that day I decided to go back to the hotel alone. I know it's immature of me to be upset they didn't even acknowledge my birthday, but I just feel like it's been months and I arranged to drive all the way down, left dd in Edinburgh, and I was so excited to do a fun activity and we could have gone out for a little bit after, but we didn't even get to do the escape room because they turned up in an absolute state.

Either cut them out of your life or tell them how you feel - either will probably lead to be the same outcome. 10 hours is too far to bother with friends like these. Focus on your new life and you'll make new friends who suit you better. Friends don't always stay the course and people change and move on. You deserve better.

I moved away a few years ago to be with DP, I used to go down often but no one ever made an effort to see me and if they did it had to be a drunk night out. All my friends wanted to do was MD and coke, I have not one slight interest at all in this. Would rather have a nice meal out and cinema or cocktails. Safe to say I don’t talk to any of my ‘friends’ from back home. It’s sad but sometimes your lives go in different directions and for the better

they sound like dicks op.
You need new friends.
How old are you?

Urgh, they are twats.
I binned a few "friends" a couple of years ago who treated me like crap (it sadly took me a long time to realise!). I'm MUCH happier since. Walk away and don't look back.

Happy Birthday.

Make new friends. Your friends sound very immature and not nice at all.

Yanbu they were twats

I can't believe what I've just read!
If this is all true, I would say if anything you underreacted!
You travelled to see them. They got drunk before meeting you which meant the plans had to change.
They took your drinks from you.
They acted like dicks all night.
Fuck them. Move on. If they say anything, just say exactly what you've written here!

It might be easier to just let the friendship gently die, rather than having it out with them. You won't be driving 10 hrs to see them again. Make new friends where you're living. Sorry you had such a crap birthday.

Happy Birthday OP ,

What shit friends they are !
1, turn up drunk when they knew they should not ( did you pay in advance for this activity ) if so loss of money
2, they took your drinks that you had bought for yourself WTF nobody takes drinks off someone ( unless that person is very drunk already and endangering themselves ) , this is called stealing.
3, it is your birthday they should be buying you drinks
4, trying to buy MD , no just no .

5 you stayed with them till 3am , why ? I would of been long gone with friends like that .
6 they are still rubbing it in later that you are boring and missed out
7 so in short , they have disrespected your wishes , stole from you , tried to get you to take drugs, completely your birthday and spoilt the next few days as you are still thinking about it.
And you think you are been unreasonable !
it is time to ditch them so called friends and start making some new ones .
I hope you and DP can have a nice day out together to celebrate your birthday the way grown ups do .

Take it from a mid twenties girl...these are the kind of shitty friends you leave behind in your mid twenties.

One day - ten years from now- whilst on someone’s crap hen do in Croatia- getting plastered and wearing matching shit outfits - they’ll wonder whatever happened to you 🙈😂 and you’ll be much better off!!!

I would quietly slip away - forever!
Not worth even having a discussion about - they are obviously not true friends.

I don’t have any friends and I would truly prefer my zero to the ones that treated you like that. Hope you find some new friends who show you love and respect and especially on your birthday. Happy birthday 🎁 🍰 xx

It's a hard lesson to learn but a really valuable one and it applies to friends and partners. You desperately need to learn this lesson because not learning it means you get stuck and don't ever get to find the real thing!

It's better to have no friends than to have shit friends.

It's better to be alone than to be in a shit relationship.

These bitches are not friends. They obviously don’t respect you enough to stay sober for one night.

In that situation I would comment in the group chat that actually it wasn’t a “sick” night (seriously, are they 16?). It was meant to be your birthday and the one thing you wanted to do you couldn’t do because your friends have drinking problems. I’d also comment how you want reimbursement for drinks that kept being taken off you, and I would make a point that unless they apologise and grown up you will be making a sharp exit from the friendship group.

I would fuck them off anyway to be honest, they sound pathetic and you could make better friends where you’ve moved to.

Ah the London bubble. I think it's time for you to move on from your London life/friends and leave it behind. Ditch them and get some new ones.

They sound very childish. Would I be right in understanding that you have DC but they don't? I think your lives have moved in different directions. You will make new friends.

They are not real friends! Make some new ones!

Ps what is MD?

Is it mdma - ecstasy?

YABU being a 'little bit annoyed'. I would be fucking furious. What dickheads. These are not your friends, at all.

What a couple of cows

I would just slip away, leave the group chat and don't contact them again. They aren't your friends anymore, your lives have gone in different directions. Friends will come and go, real true friends wouldn't behave like that.

These people are not your friends and you deserve better

Why are you friends with these arseholes?

I'm really reluctant to just slip away or address it and have them get mad at me for it. I got really badly bullied by a group of girls in second year at uni and since then I've gotten nervous around people I don't know, especially girl cliques and I've not been able to make any new proper friends. I don't have much confidence.
We also booked a holiday together in about a months time, just us three, dd and my friends son too and I've been thinking about dropping out because I'm really scared it's going to happen again and I'll get upset and ruin the trip for everyone.

You made a glaring mostake in your IP. You mentioned "friends". Friends are people that are interested in your wellbeing. These people are not your friends.

You sound pretty normal to me. You should find some other normal people to be friends with.