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AIBU?

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Original poster

Still quite upset about this...

69 replies

4TeensAndABaby · 20/10/2018 15:34

Regular lurker, infrequent poster here.

I’m posting mainly for traffic, and perhaps a bit of reassurance.

20 minutes ago I left my house to walk to Tesco (3 min walk). I walked through a park, and saw a man bending back the arm of a 9/10 year old girl. She was crying, but him and her (I assume) mum were laughing. The man let go, and the girls ran off behind a buggy. She said something which I didn’t hear, and the man marched over to her and again yanked her arm high behind her back. She was screaming and crying saying it hurt. The man then let go and said “That’ll teach you to fu*cking behave”.

I walked out of the park and called the police. I gave them all the details and everything I saw.

On my way back from the shop I got close to the park, and the woman shouted to one of her friends “Oi (name), you’ll never guess what. Some fucking cnt just called the police and said (man) was beating up (child)” and she was laughing. I decided to walk around the park and not through it, and I saw the police drive away.

I honestly can’t believe what I saw. The man was so rough with the young girl. She was screaming and crying, and the police have done nothing.

Was I wrong to call them?

OP posts:
TeeBee · 20/10/2018 15:38

Of course you did the right thing and it sounds as though they've contacted the parents. Is it worth calling them up to reiterate how serious it looked and check whether an SS referral is being made? Sounds horrible. You did the right thing. Poor girl.

Antigon · 20/10/2018 15:46

That is horrible. I hope police follow up with SS, but would be good if you do too.

PMSwithacockinmydress · 20/10/2018 15:49

That all happened in less than 20 minutes? It sounds like the police acted fast.
I guess unless they witnessed it there's little they can do at this precise moment, but hopefully they will action a safeguarding referral.

Alfie19 · 20/10/2018 15:50

No you were not wrong

Original poster
4TeensAndABaby · 20/10/2018 15:54

PMS - yes, I called 999 as soon as I was out of earshot. I stayed on the phone whilst at Tesco and they had officers there in about 5 minutes. It’s 300m to the shops from my house, and a 50m walk through a play park.

Is it worth me following up with SS do you think? The police can’t have been there long at all. I just feel for that poor girl.

OP posts:
Timeforabiscuit · 20/10/2018 15:54

The child will know that someone saw, someone cared and someone told the police.

That's worth something too, even if the parents clearly dont give a shit.

Solenti · 20/10/2018 15:57

That would really upset me too. The shit some poor kids have to go through, and sadly so much abuse like this (disguised as "a joke" or "banter" or "discipline") goes under the radar or isn't taken seriously. I would also follow up with SS. Well done for calling the police.

ElizabethMainwaring · 20/10/2018 16:05

I don't think it's right, but calling the police about a father yanking a child's arm?

VanGoghsDog · 20/10/2018 16:06

I don't see how you could follow up with SS if you don't know who they are.

GreenLantern53 · 20/10/2018 16:07

also wondering how you could call ss without knowing who they are? personally i wouldnt have got involved.

John4703 · 20/10/2018 16:09

You were right to call the police. It was an assault on a child.
It is so good that you called rather then ignoring it.

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 20/10/2018 16:11

Well done for calling the police and maybe they did nothing then and there but they might have flagged it with SS themselves. I don't see that you can do anything now unless you know their name and address.

TeeBee · 20/10/2018 16:11

It makes me so sad to think that people would not get involved to help protect a child. The police may have taken contact details, so worth following up with them first to check whether they will be making a SS referral. You know how serious it was OP as you were there. It doesn't sound like a mere yank of the arm from what you've described.

littlemisscomper · 20/10/2018 16:12

@ElizabethMainwaring

the man marched over to her and again yanked her arm high behind her back. She was screaming and crying saying it hurt. The man then let go and said “That’ll teach you to fucking behave”.*

Would you have just walked on by and left it? What if it was a man and his girlfriend, would that be more distressing to you?

OP, thank you for reporting it. I don't know what you can do now. Maybe speak to the NSPCC for advice? Poor child. What a life.

StrongTea · 20/10/2018 16:13

You were right to call, poor girl makes you wonder what the parents are like at home. Hope the police get back to you with an update.

ElizabethMainwaring · 20/10/2018 16:14

Just re-read, so the police actually turned up after you said that they pulled a child's arm? Why did they do that?

SilentIsla · 20/10/2018 16:14

Right thing, OP.

SilentIsla · 20/10/2018 16:16

This reply has been deleted

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seven201 · 20/10/2018 16:16

Elizabeth, the police came because they were told a child was being hurt! Yanking an arm behind a child's back - you think that's ever ok??

Tinkobell · 20/10/2018 16:16

You definitely did the right thing. It'd be a sad day that anyone who cared witnessed something like that a just did nothing. You did well to not confront either....,they sound rough as old nails!

Caprisunorange · 20/10/2018 16:17

Hmmm tbh sounds like the police just came past, checked everything was peaceful had a word and left. I highly doubt anything else will come of it

SilentIsla · 20/10/2018 16:17

Report it to SS.

VanGoghsDog · 20/10/2018 16:21

The police may have taken contact details, so worth following up with them first to check whether they will be making a SS referral.

Er, no, it's none of the OP's business and the police wouldn't tell them anyway.

VerbenaGirl · 20/10/2018 16:22

You did the right thing, this will now be recorded and linked to anything further that gets reported to the police, social services or at school. It is really important in safeguarding that you flag up anything that doesn’t feel right to you - so that a picture can be built up if there are repeated concerns.

BruegelTheElder · 20/10/2018 16:23

Er, no, it's none of the OP's business and the police wouldn't tell them anyway

This.

OP, you did the right thing. The responsibility now lies with the police. There is not much more you can or should do.

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