to ask if you have ever called the Samaritas?

[GlitteredAcorns]

and if so, did you find it helpful?

I have and yes they were 😊

I have in the past. I wouldn't say it was ever very helpful for me (I know others have found them very good). Occasionally it distracted me during a bad moment, but I often personally found it a bit frustrating, and apparently I don't articulate clearly when very upset and anxious. I did have a long email conversation with them, though, which was more helpful. It obviously takes them much longer to answer to an email than a call, and the answers were often quite short and simple, but the process of writing was useful.

Yes and yes

I have, many years ago when I had suicidal thoughts. The guy was perfectly nice and tried his best but I wanted advice, not a chat, and I think it was probably the wrong place to call at that time

Yes and yes

No it wasn't helpful. It was a very long time ago and I was a child. I was having a terrible time at home, and I called them one night when they were out. I explained what was happening to thr man who answered and he didn't know how to help me.

He suggested I speak to my parents to attempt to reason with them to stop the abuse. He seemed shocked, upset and out of his depth.

I was about eight. It took me all my courage to make that call. It was beyond useless.

yes I have, and no I didnt. I needed counselling and therapy, not a listening service by someone who appeared a bit shocked by what i'd said.
They certainly have their place, and in fact ive been a samaritan in the past and I believe its a vital and noble service , but its specifically a listening ear and not therapy. I was in crisis and the man had no idea what to say, and I ended up putting the phone down and felt worse. It all depends who you get. I find it a real shame that so many mental health services are being shut and people are rediirected to a volunteer led listening line rather than actual support.

No. I was suicidal and the lady on the phone was obviously inexperienced as she just kept saying can you go and talk to a friend?
Well why the hell I am calling you if that's the case.
Think the volunteers mean well but they are often out of their depth and don't really have the experience to answer calls to some people often in very desparate circumstances.

There are Samaritans and Samaritans.

They aren’t a counselling service, however what they do isn’t that dissimilar to counselling. And you do get a lot of counsellors and therapists moonlighting as Sams. The big difference is you don’t get repeated sessions - you can call as often as you want but you won’t get the same volunteer.

in fact I think one of the problems with the samaritans, is the requirements for their volunteers to do a nightshift at least every month, so everyone takes their turn, and to mix and match their shifts. It makes it impossible for a lot of people with families, especially single parents and also people who work, which meant that in my branch, it was almost entirely staffed by elderly people and a few students, as they were the only ones who could do all the required nightshifts etc. I wasnt even allowed to cut out the night shifts when I was pregnant, which was why I ended up leaving.
This lack of diversity makes a difference to how helpful the listener can be

Yes I have, and no I didn't. As PPs have said, it's a listening service and hit and miss as to who you get. What I needed was therapy and advice and someone to help me out of the situation I was in. Not just listening and saying 'mhmm'. Had a similar experience with childline

I've also turned up at a Samaritans office when in a major crisis. I ended up in a tiny room with two old men (I was 18 and very vulnerable at the time). It was ferrifying and I ran

They aren't going to be able to solve your problems. Advice-giving is outside their remit. They are there to listen only. I have called and found it useful as a way to voice what's going on inside my head and get the emotions out.

I can see why some people might find it frustrating and unhelpful. There can be silences because they are trained to allow breaks in conversation and not to push. Don't expect any analysis of your situation that you would get from a counsellor though.

Thank you everyone. I am interested in your views. I am currently training with them, I am also on my second year of a counselling course...

I emailed, and no, not really. I wanted advice but it turns out they’re not allowed to offer suggestions.

How are you finding it?

Yes. One call and various emails. All so helpful. I am glad they were there.

I called them when I was having a really difficult time at uni. A lot of crap was happening at home and a school friend of mine had died a few months earlier. My family were too busy dealing with their own stuff to really support me and my uni friends were out of their depth and didn’t really know what to say.

I found that just having someone offer me sympathy and acknowledge that yes, that was a lot for a 20-year-old to go through and just generally make ‘oh you poor thing’ kind of noises was immensely helpful. It made me feel like I wasn’t just being silly and weak for being so upset.

I have phoned and gone in person. It was useful up to a point. I got the impression that the person on the phone had been trained with various scripts, eg to say things like 'how are you feeling about that?' Like gentle probing but without giving any real suggestions. But they do listen, which is valuable.

In person I found that they don't seem to actually expect anyone to turn up in person, even though their publicity says you can. Like they were a bit taken aback, unprepared, worrying about which room to put me in, struggling to find anyone to talk to me. Finally when I did get put in a room with a person it was OK.

Despite their limitations, I am glad they exist.

Yes. It was useful to the extent that I had bottled up a lot inside and the call was the first time I was realeasing those emotions and fears. Useless in terms of advice though...My volunteer could only see things through her own British cultural lense... and what was a big issue in my family's culture... she just couldn't understand why I was making a big deal out of it. An analogy of my call would've been me calling to ask for help because I was being pressured/forced into an arranged marriage, and her saying, "I don't get it, just say no and date who you want" It wasn't exactly this scenario (as I don't want to out myself) but was of similar strength. I found the call just made me even more confused and made me feel weak and powerless.

I was a Samaritan and as a result, no I wouldn't phone them myself. Take from that what you will!

@Bluntness100 that makes me so sad for you. You must've been so scared... at that age making a call to dob in your parents is such a big step and it's a shame you didn't get the right person on the phone.

I have I have anxiety and OCD pure O. So I had intrusive thoughts and what ifs about what if I died ? Or killed myself? And I was panicking and stressing so much about what if this was true what I was thinking? I know now I am not my thoughts and it was just an intrusive thought but I was scared to talk to anyone at all. I phoned them and spoke to a lovely Irish lady she seemed abit confused on why I'm calling as she said I was probably the most safest person she'd ever spoke to as I didn't want to die nor had any intention of dying but at the moment I felt so overwhelmed I had to talk to someone who didn't know me and would just listen and reassure me and it did. Sorry this is so long

I have in the past but wouldn't recommend it as didn't get an empathetic response. It did feel like the Samaritan was out of their depth and that caused me to feel more isolated.
I did email several times & found the responses to be more considered & caring.

Like Bluntness my only experience of calling them was a long time ago and I was a child. I was however in genuine distress - very, very frightened of a older, male teacher at school. I'd lost a book and was terrified of the telling off I would get from him. Like wet-my-knickers scared.

They basically thought I was a prank caller.

I was so upset and have never used them since.

Yes an no. They were awful. Their whole approach to call handling is awful. The advice they give is awful. Utter shambles of a 'support' and crisis service.