Would this bother anyone else?

[cabbage78]

I really can't tell if iam being unreasonable in thinking this? So be honest i am aware imight be biased.
My DD is 18 and just started uni..living in halls with 4 others in her flat. She really gets on great with 2 of the boys and has tried and tried to befriend the only other girl in the flat but to no avail. The other girl "Clare" has latched on to a girl in the flat above and now pretty much ignores the others in her flat except for one boy who has joined her little group of her him and flat above girl.
Just for background..DD overheard Clare telling flat above girl that herand the boy have a secret throwing up sound they make that the other three dont know what it means....i don't know either but it sounds a bit weird.

Anyway to the point.. Clare keeps washing all the dishes.. constantly. If DD so much as uses a plate and knife and then leaves in for 10 mins she comes back and it's washed. Apparently not washed properly and not put back in correct draw but washed.
DD and 2 boys have asked her repeatedly not Todo this..say they will wash their own dishes. But she just ignores them. One boy even left a post note on his dishes to say not to wash them he would be back in an HR. They have walked into kitchen whilst she is mid wash and asked her to stop but she says no and carries on.
The kitchen is clean..I have seen it's not that they would leavedishes to go mouldy..they just might want to wash them at a more convenient time... shall they just let her get on with it..even though they do t like it? It doesn't seem like she will stop unless they wash everything straight away..which is surely unrealistic for student? Clare also asked the boyshe is friends with in flat to call aflat meeting and basically berate the others for all the work Clare does and how they need to step up...whilst Clare just sat there. The other three are confused by this and just want to get on with uni life without petty kitchen stuff. One boy said he feels on edge even using the kitchen. Just for more background DD suffers with anxiety and that's why I dont know if she is over reacting being bothered by this? It can be hard for me to be objective.
To advice I gave her is to ignore and just be as nice as possible to Clare and just get on with uni Life.

Clare sounds hard to live with but you're saying her anxiety is unreasonable because it effects your daughter's anxiety 🙄 Yet only Clare's anxiety makes her unsuited to student digs?

It sounds like they aren't compatible to living together. Nobody's anxiety wins. It's early in the academic year - could your DD move or transfer? I know you think Clare should but you don't have any input into that - you can only influence what your DD does.

Possibly OCD or similar but equally possible she’s just playing the martyr. There’s a balance to be struck with dishes and if she’s insisting on instantly cleaning dishes, even when someone as left a note explaining theyll do it in an hour, then she’s being unreasonable.

Clare sounds like she has ocd and is a bully. Her and the other boy teaming up and ignoring the others. someone needs to speak up and tell her like it is. Fair enough ocd is a problem and I have been there but it seems really off that she seems to look down on other peoples efforts. Her way or the highway.

They need to have a meeting, and agree democratically what works for them. If Claire doesn’t like the majority view she has the option to find alternative accommodation.

She has every right to live in a clean environment; what she can’t do is dictate to the rest of them how they live.

There are plenty of clean freak students out there, not everyone lives like The Young Ones. She’ll find somewhere if it bothers her that much.

"Not over invested"

You think? How often do you phone your daughter? Every 5 minutes?

I don't think many posters have been in student accommodation.

Last year my DS shared a flat with one boy who didn't wash his dishes for weeks on end. The kitchen was inspected regularly by the university and they saw this as a minor infringement.

In reality in student halls leaving a plate for a few hours is not a big deal. Claire obviously has issues and your dd and her friends should ignore her.

I think you need to leave your daughter to settle. Most flat mates don’t necessarily become best friends, why would they? It’s usual to find your own group that you’ve chosen.
She might be a bit obsessive but far better that than slovenly in a shared house.