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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To give up on Parkrun - photo related

225 replies

Parkrunmisery · 14/10/2018 08:59

OK so this is shallow but I did Parkrun yesterday and whilst I love its open and friendly ethos I look BEYOND SHIT in the fb photos they've posted. I'm honestly not being vain, but I am old (50s) and fat. I want to run to get fitter and thinner but having my photo on the Internet looking horrible makes me miserable.

So AIBU to sack off lovely Parkrun due to their insistence on posting photos of me looking utterly shit*.

*old, fat, red faced, baggy, flabby, grey, no make-up and hair looking shit. I really don't want to have to think about getting made up for sodding photos at 8am.

OP posts:
gamerchick · 14/10/2018 09:21

Sorry, I missed the other posts. I do get that it's not about how we look - although a lot of people do look terrific, happy, bouncy, fit, smiley

See this is the thing. We look at our own photos completely differently to go other people look at them.

If you stick at them you'll look at that first photo in a year's time and see the difference.

You'll have a different type of feeling then.

Lethaldrizzle · 14/10/2018 09:22

Ajas - you can still be proper gorgeous at 46!

SecondRow · 14/10/2018 09:22

Get a t-shirt that says NO PHOTOS PLEASE to wear for parkrun Wink

But since it's a small parkrun surely they won't mind taking down any photos you flag to them? They won't be inundated. Or are you worried about who will already have seen it by the time they get around to your request? I do know how you feel as I get a big red head when running too but I guess the supportive ethos of parkrun means you just have to trust that no-one is slagging you off for it.

EdWinchester · 14/10/2018 09:23

I hate this about parkrun. Where do they ask permission? I do not want a photo of me running on social media.

My son always looks incredible in the photos - they always seem to capture him with both feet off the ground so he looks like a gazelle. Dh also - always beaming and looking great.

I look like a cross old hag.

Strugglingtodomybest · 14/10/2018 09:23

Have you asked them not to photograph you or not to put the photos on Facebook? If there are only 30 of you, if wouldn't be hard to remember not to include you in the photos.

Dollymixture22 · 14/10/2018 09:24

I absolutely hate it when people take pictures without my permission.

I have stopped going out with a group I used to work with because the very annoying girl who organises it takes photos all night and posts the, on Facebook. Even when I have repeatedly asked her to stop.

Do you know who is doing this -can your talk to them.

Facebook is horrible. I cam off it about a year ago and am much happier.

Soontobe60 · 14/10/2018 09:24

I could have written your post! Here's me looking horrific. However, it was the first parkrun I've ever finished, so felt amazing!

To give up on Parkrun - photo related
Myimaginarycathasfleas · 14/10/2018 09:24

We live in a photo obsessed age, OP. I’d hate this too. You have a right to your privacy - wear a distinctive T shirt so the organisers can pick you out and then tell them you don’t give permission for them to post pictures of you. Don’t wear anything funny or you’ll just end up on everybody else’s Facebook page.

Sitranced · 14/10/2018 09:24

Give the photographer the finger as you run past. I bet they don't put it on faceache.

Original poster
Parkrunmisery · 14/10/2018 09:25

Ajas I think you partly have hit the nub of the thing. I did used to be pretty and slim, and I'm finding it hard to see myself as old and (gosh I almost teared up writing this) ugly. HOW EMBARRASSING.

OP posts:
Original poster
Parkrunmisery · 14/10/2018 09:27

Soontobe60 - see, I think you look lovely.

OP posts:
DayManChampionOfTheSun · 14/10/2018 09:28

I dont get why they need to take pictures to put on social media. Can we not do anything now with it being uploaded?

Soontobe60 · 14/10/2018 09:28

Parktunmisery, looking glamorous, young and lovely won't do anything to make you live a healthy life, but a strong heart, good lungs and flexible joints will. I always go home after my run, have a long shower, put some slap on and nice clothes then feel really good about myself.

TheKitchenWitch · 14/10/2018 09:30

Soontobe60 you look determined, focused and happy Smile

lottiegarbanzo · 14/10/2018 09:30

With such a small group, I'd mention it to the organisers. They need to know it could put people off taking part.

They must be taking pictures of the same 30 people again and again. If there were 100s of people there, chances are you wouldn't be in the photos posted, most weeks. Could they not use one set of photos to promote it, rather than updating them every week?

Sarahjconnor · 14/10/2018 09:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EdWinchester · 14/10/2018 09:31

I can’t imagine only 30! Ours is closer to 200.

Soontobe60 · 14/10/2018 09:31

See, you think I look ok! I'm 3 stone overweight, totally grey hair now, more wrinkles than I'd like but I am 59, so don't feel too bad most of the time. I just started running this year with my young, fit, skinny, beautiful daughter. She looks bad on her parkrun pics too 😂

To give up on Parkrun - photo related
Soontobe60 · 14/10/2018 09:32

We should share our parkrun photos as a celebration of an achievement!

Cakemonger · 14/10/2018 09:32

Gosh, I was considering starting parkrun but I didn't know they take your photo and put it on the internet. I hate having my photo taken at the best of times and I am not an attractive exerciser! I know some say 'who cares?' and that's great for them but it really would upset me and knock my confidence.

I would speak to someone before the event and quietly tell them you don't want your photo taken. It can't be legal for them to put your photo online when you have explicitly withdrawn consent. Not that you ever gave consent...

I also hate facebook and how people now take your picture at every single social event without asking.

Meet0nTheIedge · 14/10/2018 09:34

You ought to be able to opt out, I suppose though on the basis that people usually opt-out for privacy reasons but in Parkrun you are listed for everyone to see on the website there isn't much point. I'd hate it too, in fact I was thinking of starting Parkrun and this is not helping persuade me to do it.

Cakemonger · 14/10/2018 09:34

God it felt good to rant about that

dailyshite · 14/10/2018 09:37

If there are only 30 of you, just tell the run director not to take photos of you or to warn you in advance so that you can pull a silly face. Will be easy to do with such a small number.

I do this in every photo anyone takes of me because otherwise I look like Stuart in the Big Bang Theory having his photo taken for internet dating.

Longlostpals · 14/10/2018 09:38

OP it's up to you if this is upsetting enough to quit but for gods sake do not do what others on the thread have suggested and ask them to remove you from the photos.

Parkrun is a free event run by volunteers. It encourages people of all ages, social classes and abilities to get out there and run on a Saturday morning. One of the perks is getting photos taken for free when you usually have to pay for them in an organised race. By participating you are consenting to have them taken. Please do not ask these volunteers to spend their time sifting through the photos to remove you from them. (I do realise that you haven't suggested this yourself)

Mouseville65 · 14/10/2018 09:39

My friend sends me her pictures every few weeks and we howl laughing - not many people look good mid exercise, you just have to laugh :)