Fatshaming

[travelinterest]

After a conversation with friends, and with obesity (especially in young people) becoming a bigger crisis than smoking in our society, am I unreasonable to think that as we villanise smoking and drinking, should we fat shame more to encourage people to change their lifestyles. It's certainly worked with reducing smoking rates. Don't attack me (I've lost 2 stone). Just wondering why we target smoking more than fast food?

That's not what we're talking about though is it?

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Babyshark You sound so sad. I am sorry you feel so isolated. have you been to see your doctor.

It's the chicken and the egg in so many senses comfort searching. I hope you feel better too. Do not worry about your weight for now, take little steps to making yourself feel better. Life is worth it especially with your DS.

Well when someone pointed out how large (curvy) my shock horror size 14 (old size) sister was she took action. An action which led to anorexia and bulimia. She may now be a size 8 to 10 but has brittle bones and rotten teeth and her diet is worse than mine.
So no, fat shaming is not the answer.

I hope you get help baby.

I don't believe in shaming anyone out of anything, including tobacco and alcohol addiction. Would you try and shame someone out of depression, tell them to snap out of it? Intervention needs to start in childhood, in the womb even. And I dont mean with diet, that is a part of it but is a small part of a big picture. Look into the ACE study if you haven't heard of it, it's gaining lots of coverage in Scotland and Wales. If you're looking at treating an obese person, you need to be looking at that person's childhood and know what they've gone through to get to where they are now.

Babyshark, could you maybe have depression? Maybe a trip to thr doctors would help you, a maybe a doctor could come see you.

There is a way through this, for your sake and for you child's, it's really just taking that first step. And you deserve so much more than the way you're treating yourself.

When is the last time you left the house? Went someplace nice? Bought yourself a treat? Took your kid someplace fun? You deserve all these things, and just need to take that first step, maybe in seeing a doctor, to find a way forward,

As you yourself said, you can do it.

@Oswaldspengler

I'm sorry, but you clearly have absolutely no idea what it's like to suffer from low self esteem and feel a compulsion to 'comfort eat'. Then your weight increases and your self esteem plummets even further.

Most of us now know better to tell a depressed person to 'snap out of it', as a PP has already pointed out. Well, telling an overweight person who is depressed and addicted to comfort eating to just change their eating habits is equally a waste of breath, as it's just not possible until they're ready to face it.

I've been there, as a yo-yo dieter, who is also depressed and suffers from MH issues. I'm overweight at the moment, size 14/16, I know I could do with losing weight, but to be frank, my weight is the least of my problems right now. I have complex PTSD because of childhood SA, waiting for therapy, and I also have 2 adopted DDs of 9 and 6, DD1 has a lot of behavioural issues due to Attachment Disorder and probably being on the Autistic Spectrum, and waiting for play therapy.

My DDs are not overweight at all, I make sure they have a healthy diet. But I definitely don't want them to get the idea that they're self worth is to be found in what they weigh. They already worry about looking fat when they don't have an ounce of fat on them (I blame Barbie and Disney princesses for this).

You clearly haven't suffered from depression, have you? So sorry, you really don't know what you're talking about. 

And I'm not saying that it's a good thing to be overweight, which is why I make sure my DDs have a healthy diet. But it's a case of tackling one issue at a time.

Okay, what would you do? Would you bring up a person's weight when you don't know anything else about them? Because it could be someone who is rock bottom and you might actually tip them over the edge.

If its a close friend then there might be a point in trying to help. You could offer to go with them to Slimming World, or to do an activity with them, for example swimming/gym membership/walking. In other words, be a positive influence, not fat shaming.

the main factors running through obesity in the US and the UK is socioeconomic deprivation, solve these problems. makes society better for everyone.

Obesity is on the rise because cooking and eating out has become an accessible, pleasurable hobby rather than a function.
High streets are full of eateries - it’s become something to do.

"namby pambying people doesn't help imho"

You're an arsehole, but I suspect you already know this.

@Oswald so please give an example as to how you’d feel ok shaming some for their weight? Pointing at them? Shouting at them? How would you envisage fat shaming working?

Sorry, I'll admit I've only read the OP and skimmed a handful of replies so this might have already been said.

Personally, I feel that the only way to deal with the obesity epidemic is for GPs to accept that in most cases excess weight has a psychological basis and, instead of just telling patients that they need to lose weight and sending them on their way, they should actually arrange for them to see a psychologist to unpick the reasons for their weight so they know how to address it specifically in their situation. They need real, effective support to lose weight if they want to.

As previous posters have pointed out, fat-shaming is totally counter productive, it will most likely make a person more upset and they will probably comfort eat, which will make their problems worse.

I know I’m fat, it’s not something I’m proud of but nor am I ashamed of it. I have several health issues that make exercising almost impossible but I do what I can. I’m on a calorie controlled diet and plan all my meals in advance so I’m sure of the nutritional content. I don’t want to be fat but I’m fat and HEALTHY. I have no health issues caused by my weight and my drs are pleased with my health and my approach to it. I’m struggling to lose weight but I can manage it so I don’t get any bigger and remain healthy. Shaming ME won’t help the weight fall off. It’ll just make you an ass. I’ll remain my accepting self and continue to do what I’m doing. Fat shaming is what lead to two of my sisters developing eating disorders. Ones been anorexic for over 30 years, the other is still recovering from bulimia. They’re slim, but they’re not happy and they certainly aren’t healthy. Stick by the message from Bambi, if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.

I feel that the only way to deal with the obesity epidemic is for GPs to accept that in most cases excess weight has a psychological basis

I'm not sure that's true. Do you have a link to any studies that show this? I have been over weight, possibly bordering on obese, I know plenty of close friends who have also been or are and pretty much everyone will tell you they simply eat and drink too much and can't be arsed exercising and it crept on. My view would be that's fairly common.

I think to say that everyone over weight, and let's remember clinically obese is very common, often a size 16, is suffering from some form of mental health issue is way off beam. I get that many are, but I think to say it's nearly all is a vast over exaggeration.

I think the problem is that even doctors don't understand how closely linked obesity is to the state of mind. If a patient isn't in the right headspace to take action then telling them to lose weight is expecting the impossible.

It's well understood that anorexia is an eating disorder and that the sufferer can't just change their eating habits by being told that they need to eat more. Bingeing is an eating disorder, too, and overweight people need help to understand why they 'comfort eat'. Okay, I agree that this isn't always the case, sometimes it is because people can't be bothered to do anything about their weight, but more often than not there are MH issues involved.

I just think doctors should be aware that there could be an underlying reason why the person they're treating is unable to lose weight, or unable to keep it off if they do lose weight.

but more often than not there are MH issues involved

And that's what I'm querying, you said it was nearly everyone, then more often or not. I don't think this is the case. I fully agree you have to be in the right mindset to lose weight, but as said, when it's over weight or mild obesity, in my experience this is often due to poor lifestyle choices.

I've done it myself. If a doctor had said to me I will send you for therapy to lose weight I'd have thought he was bonkers. I had no mental health issues that needed unpicking. Anyone in this category I know had no mental health issues, which doesn't mean I don't accept these people exists but more I'm disputing it's nearly everyone.

Very often it's just busy with work, kids, everyday life, eating shit for awhile not exercising, too much socialising, that leads to weight gain. Obesity is not forty stone and can't get out your room, obesity is as common as the size 16 woman. The average size I think. To say they all suffer mental health issues is for me, not right.

It wasn't me who said 'nearly everyone', that was another poster. I wouldn't presume to say it was that clear-cut, everyone is different. But it's fair to say that overeating can be an eating disorder same as anorexia and bulimia, and just telling them to lose weight isn't going to help.