About my wonderful MIL & Mum

[kaytee87]

I have recently gone back to work 17.5 hours over 3 days. DS is 2yo and is in nursery one day, with my mum one day and MIL one day.
Both of DS's granny's have been really supportive with this change of lifestyle and I'm very grateful.
The day MIL has DS she makes us all dinner, I don't usually make it in time as DS likes his dinner early so she boxes mine up to be reheated at home! She has even offered to batch cook us meals for our freezer to make life easier.
My own mum comes 10 minutes early on the day she has him to run me to the train station and help with bags etc.
Tell me about the wonderful women in your life.

I don't really have any, but it's so refreshing to read a nice MIL and Mum Thread.

My DM and MIL are both getting older now but would do things like you have described when DCs were small.

I also have a group of 4 amazing friends. We came together in various ways through work and they are the most supportive group Inhave ever been a part of. We are all at different stages of our lives. 2 have grandchildren, one is and has always been single with no DCs. I just bloody love them!

My mum is fabulous. Both her and my dad enjoy having our DD. My MIL however, well let’s say that we don’t have the best of relationships

Love both my Mum and MIL. Neither live particularly close but my Mum knits for my DD and my MIL does my ironing when they visit. They both take her out when they visit even if it's just so me and DH can have a quiet cup of coffee together or catch up on sleep.

My mum died when I was 13 but she was wonderful. My MIL is a complete nightmare and has never helped me or supported me emotionally in any way.

However, I have two wonderful dds ages 18 and 15 who are lovely young women, full of life and energy. I am also dealing with cancer right now and they have been a fantastic help and given me so much love and support.

My eldest was just chosen out of 80 girls to lead a school retreat and I'm really proud that she is able to fulfill her potential, even with her auld mother having issues with her health

Both mine are amazing and have always helped out with my children even though I don't work. They have both always done alternate weeks having each of mine from babies until they start school one day a week. Help with pick ups from school if needed, babysitting so OH and I can go out. All the children are very close to their grandparents which I love and both families are very close and we all socialise together.

My DDs are teenagers now, and my mum a pensioner, but when the DDs were babies my mum (and dad) were lovely in looking after each of them when I returned to work. First DD she had for 18m and DD2 for about 8m (because DD2 was harder work and was ready for nursery sooner). My dad would come and collect them to take them to their house or drop them to nursery, and if asked he would always pop to the station to pick me up. I lost my dad last year and I miss him dreadfully as we were very close. My mum is 82 now and it's my turn to help look after her. I've been very lucky with my parents.

My mum is absolutely brilliant I love her. She’s funny and kind and supportive. I’m so lucky.

She sends me little notes and post cards all the time. She texts to say she’s bought something for me that she thought I’d like. She’s supportive of all my life choices even those she doesn’t understand.

Ahh OP that's so lovely, I'll be going back on consolidated hours and so will DH, we had planned the same as you, one day nursery and DM and MIL had offered to do the other two. MIL has now retired early 'to be on hand whenever you need me, but I don't want to intrude, just let me know what you need'. This will save us an absolute fortune in child care and I realise we are so fortunate to have that kind of support. DF is keen to help but is a bit anxious on his own with a small baby, he currently has DN (3) one day a week when DB and SIL are both at work and DM has her another day. I feel very privileged to have that kind of family network. I see so many negative threads especially about MILs I'm glad someone else feels the same as me!

My mum is wonderful :) I moved back in with my parents due to ill health. They let me get away with contributing very little to the household. My mum comes with me to every chemo session. She has even said she will give up her job and care for me when I need end of life care if I want her to.

It's lovely to read of so many lovely mums/other women. Sorry for those who have less supportive ones

My mum and my MIL are both perfect too! Supportive, respectful and total grafters to try and help us where they possibly can,

My Mum is amazing, she looks after 5 Grandchildren, 3 days a week as well as working 2 days a week herself in a normal job. She will bend over backwards and give up everything for us and our children.
My MIL is also amazing. She has offered on numerous occasions to look after my 2 girls but she isn't well herself and I feel I just couldn't do that to her. She has her Daughter's girls quite a bit, too much I say but who am I to get in the way. She is in so much pain some days eith her illness, but yet she manages to just get up and get on with her day (most of the time). She does so much fun thongs with the girls, they just love going to her house to visit.
My Step MIL is wonderful. She steps in if we ever need her and treats our girls to days out and sleepovers.
I have 2 wonderful sisters who would drop anything to be there for us. And have a fab couple of girlfriends who I trust and can rely on.
We are a very lucky family to have such wonderful mothers, sisters and friends supporting us in raising our children.

My mother is currently looking after my third and her youngest grandchild of five so I can go to bed and have a bit of sleep.
She is utterly amazing. Does nursery and school drops, has them overnight, pops down and helps, does my ironing, makes the odd dinner.
I would - well we would - be lost without her. She’s such a loving, cheerful and kind person. In every way I can think of, I’m so very lucky to call her Mum.

My mum was my best friend, she made and bought a pack lunch for my exh when I was in labour with our daughter who is now 27.

When I returned to work when my dd was 8mths she looked after my dd and cooked us dinner one night a week & Sundays. Nothing was ever too much trouble.

She was a diamond of a lady, sadly she passed away 18yrs ago.

I like to thank I help my kids out as much as my mum helped me.

Good to read you have a helpful mum and mil.

My nan was the most wonderful person I've ever met.
I knew no matter what happened she'd always have my back and even as a scruffy, loose moral-ed teenager I could turn up on her doorstep and be given a cup of tea, a warm bed and a big heap of unconditional love.
She was tough, and funny. A fierce feminist who always stood up for the underdog and never got walked all over.

She's been gone two years now and I miss her so, so much but I know that I feel this way because of all the wonderful memories I have, and I feel so lucky to have been loved so completely and to be able to take such inspiration from such a wonderful strong woman.

I recently returned to work PT and due to DH's confirmed work as a freelancer my MiL isbcoming to cover childcare gaps 3 times before Christmas when we go to visit them. They have a busy social life and she's dropping everything to come and help us. I'm determined not to make it a habit as I'm so grateful we have them close by enough to help. My parents live overseas but are hoping to sell up as move back so to see my DS grow up.
I'm so grateful I have them in my life, especially after reading lots of MiL nightmare stories on here!

No mother and MIL is a nightmare (not that it matters as she’s cut off) but my sister is a treasure.

My aunt and my MIL. I was left without parents in my late teens so no mother to help.

My MIL is kind, caring and adores her grandchildren. My aunt is the same and treats my children like her own grandchildren.

They looked after him the three days I went back to work (alternating one day) and spoil him rotten and are the same with my baby.

They help practically and emotionally and are a massive support. I’d be lost without them.

My lovely mum. She grew up in NI, was a nurse there. My dad was a police officer in NI during the troubles and one day he decided he just couldn't do it anymore and wanted to move to England to join the police here. She gave up everything, with next to no notice and moved over here with him. She got a job as a MH nurse on a psychiatric ward and has recently retired early. She is there for me whenever I need it, she cooks a Sunday dinner every week and if we can't come over she drops it over for us to have at home. She absolutely dotes on her GC. She cares for everyone around her and I just love her so much!!

My mum has been through hell and back with me due to illness starting with meningitus when I was only 3 weeks old. It was touch and go and I was baptised in the hospital sink. I've then had 15 operations through my childhood - some days apart.

She has never faltered in her love and devotion to me. Ever. I now see her doing the same towards my son and it gives me a warm, glowy feeling.

She is my rock and would give me the last penny or clothes off her back if I, or my son needed them.

I luffs my Mum

My DMum is no longer with us. She was abused by her own mother and had a lot of MH issues as a result her entire adult life but she was determined to not pay it forward and was an amazing mother to me and my sibs. I miss her every day and talk to her all the time. I loved her to bits.

OP - I'm glad you appreciate how lucky you are

My mum died when I was three, I have only one very hazy memory of her making me a cooked lunch.

My DH is lovely, married nearly 25 years and we have 5 dcs. MIL, while not an unpleasant or unkind person has never really been involved other than occasional visits and usual annual gifts. She seems fond of us, but doesn’t really demonstrate it. She’s not really a ‘cold’ person so it’s strange but she has chosen not to do anything to create a deeper bond or relationship and I feel she doesn’t really know us well despite not living far away. Because of my own experience I find this really sad.

These are lovely stories, reading has made me feel a bit emotional. I have a great relationship with my dcs (I think and hope I do), we are all very close, I always want to be able to be the mum and hopefully in time, grandparent, that I wish I’d had.

Just sent my Mum a gushy thank you text as a result of this thread. Thanks all

Aren’t we lucky to have a mum, a MIL, or a grandma who has loved us SO much and provided much needed help and advice.
My beloved grandma died thirty years ago - thirty, I can’t believe it- and I miss her as much today as the day she died.
I hear her voice in my daughters and my heart squeezes with love for these two amazing females who have influenced my life so much.

WhatwouldLeslieKnopeDo
Your mum sounds amazing. You must be amazing too and I think it’s wonderful but totally correct and natural that your mum would want to care for you if you need end of life care. I really really hope it doesn’t come to that for you both. You are both s. I send you positive energy and much luck and I hope hope hope your chemo works sweetheart. ❤️