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About my wonderful MIL & Mum

70 replies

kaytee87 · 11/10/2018 09:20

I have recently gone back to work 17.5 hours over 3 days. DS is 2yo and is in nursery one day, with my mum one day and MIL one day.
Both of DS's granny's have been really supportive with this change of lifestyle and I'm very grateful.
The day MIL has DS she makes us all dinner, I don't usually make it in time as DS likes his dinner early Grin so she boxes mine up to be reheated at home! She has even offered to batch cook us meals for our freezer to make life easier.
My own mum comes 10 minutes early on the day she has him to run me to the train station and help with bags etc.
Tell me about the wonderful women in your life.

OP posts:

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 11/10/2018 11:43

Lovely thread Kaytee, must be fabulous having so much support and it's nice you appreciate it so much.


Ilovecookiedough · 11/10/2018 11:49

My mum is amazing (and so is my dad) helping us out with childcare and just anything in general. We fell out a lot when I was an angry teenager and it didn't get much better in my 20s. Now I have my own family, well I can't really say a bad word about them, our kids love them so much too. We are very lucky to have them, I'm so glad our relationship has finally recovered.

My two nan's were also amazing ladies, they spent a lot of time looking after me and my siblings so that our parents could work. They were such a big part of our lives. My mum loved my dad's mum as a second mum. They were both lovely ladies, we lost them 30 and 20 years ago and we still miss them both dearly. I feel emotional just thinking about them!

I don't speak to my mil though 😬.


Hidillyho · 11/10/2018 11:56

I love my mum and MIL which is apparently rare.
Each will have DC when needed and would be there in a heartbeat if we needed ‘emergency help’.
The best thing about them is they are completely different, which means the support we need as a family can usually be met by one or the other.
I can only hope that I mirror them both when my DC have children


fdgdfgdfgdfg · 11/10/2018 11:58

My Daughter was a complete surprise, as in no idea until my partner went into labour. My DPs sister went to the hospital with her, and their mum was called and said she'd meet them at the hospital. She turned up 2 hours later, having missed the birth, but with everything we'd possibly need for the baby for the next month stashed in the back of the car.

My DP continued living with her parents for the next 3 months, until my house was ready for them to move in. Both MIL and FIL were fantastic the whole time.

My own mum was equally great, I phoned her up, dreading telling her that I'd had a child with someone I'd only been seeing for 10 months, and her first words were "fdgd, thats brilliant". Made me feel so relieved and that this wasn't the end of the world.

Both sides of the family have been so supportive over the last 11 years, financially, with childcare and just being fantastic grandparents.

My MIL died 5 years ago, just before Christmas. She knew she wasn't going to make it till Christmas, but she still spent time buying loads of daft christmas presents for us all, stuff that we'd laugh at, to try and cheer us up that Christmas.

My own Mum is struggling with terminal cancer now too, but it's impossible to get her to slow down. She still offers to have my daughter over for sleepovers, and she gets so annoyed when we try to help her the way she's helped us over the years


Grumpbum123 · 11/10/2018 11:59

I love both my Mum and my MIL. They’re both very different but amazing in their own ways


ethelfleda · 11/10/2018 11:59

What a lovely thread Smile


Celebelly · 11/10/2018 12:04

My mum is fantastic. She's just a force of nature. She's generous to a fault and is someone who always rolls her sleeves up and gets stuck in - whenever she and stepdad come to visit they always want to help out with stuff we need done in the house or garden. They never just sit around waiting to be offered tea - they're in there filling the kettle, Mum is washing up anything in the sink. They're both brilliant.

Since I've been pregnant (I'm an only child and this will be her first grandchild) she has been so excited, buying bits and pieces for the baby, clothes for me. We talk every day and I love the bones of her and can't wait for my daughter to meet her gran - my mum had breast cancer a few years ago and there was a small part of me that was worried she might never get the chance to become a gran.

Sadly I have no MiL as my partner's mother died about eight years ago, before I met him. It makes me sad as she sounds like she was a lovely woman.


dawnmist · 11/10/2018 12:16

Nice to hear of people appreciating their mums. I did everything and more for my dd, never refused her a thing. Unfortunately she had no use for me after i’d served my purpose.


Strugglingtodomybest · 11/10/2018 12:22

My MIL was wonderful while she was alive, I don't know what I'd have done without her at times.

I have some amazing women friends too who are of huge emotional support to me.


dreamyflower · 11/10/2018 12:31

Lovely thread. Before I went on maternity leave with my second, my mum and sister looked after my ds for 3 days a week whilst I worked. I sais a few timea about nursery but they wouldn't hear of it. They picked him up looked after him all day and dropped him home. He adores them both. Now I'm on maternity, they still have him regularly as they miss him. I've suffered with severe pelvic girdle pain and they've been taking me to my appointments and helping me a few times a week. Words can't describe how grateful I am to them both.


NWQM · 11/10/2018 12:45

I've just lost my Mum. Can't tell you how much comfort reading these lovely stories has given me as it reminds me how very special she was at the end of the hardest week. She was a fabulously support Mum who helped my cousins and I be the first generation to go to University. She gave her time so we could do all sorts of activities - try pretty much whatever we liked. Meanwhile she had a stroke very young - in her 40's - but found the strength to not only learn to walk and talk again but to run for nearly 30 years a stroke support club. She held my hand through abuse and miscarriages - always fighting for me. Her joy on becoming a grandmother when we finally adopted was wonderful. My heart is broken at the minute but still full of love.


SneakyGremlins · 11/10/2018 12:46

I don't have a mum or MIL but can I nominate my grandma?

She always stayed over for my birthday growing up and left a worthers under my pillow.

I used to go to hers in winter to stay overnight and as I got out of the car she'd usher me inside to a bowl of her amazing chicken soup which she still won't give me the recipe of and a Bird's bread roll!

We used to watch Midsomer Murders together, then countdown, then we'd have dinner nip to the library for a DVD to watch with a bedtime hot chocolate.

I think I'm going to write to her again.

lovely thread OP Smile


Gazelda · 11/10/2018 12:59

My MIL is the warmest and cuddliest Nanna my DD could wish for. She teaches her knitting and how to make apple pie.

My DSM is my DD's biggest fan. She encourages, praises, spends hours talking about DDs hobbies.

Neither have been able to provide childcare, not even babysitting. But they're both a wonderful and central part of DDs life.


DorotheaHomeAlone · 11/10/2018 13:53

These are so lovely!

So many of these mums sound similar to mine. She’s an amazing support to me and to us as a family. She does loads of practical stuff like weekly childcare for our two under fives(!) She’s so patent and loving with them and just as energetic and fun as she was with us when we were small. But she’s also so thoughtful and generous. Money for a hotel in my account and a nights babysitting if me and dh seem a bit weary, new shoes when the kids have a growth spurt or a new coat when the weather turns. She makes me feel as cared for as I did as a child.

She has also always listened without judgement so I can tell her anything and know she loves me regardless. She is my number one fan and makes me a stronger and better person.


Sipperskipper · 11/10/2018 14:01

My mum is just wonderful. I had a lovely, secure, happy childhood thanks to her. She always, always put us before everything else. Now I’m an adult, she is my best friend. When DD was born and we had a tough time in hospital, and then with PND, she was amazing. Basically moved in to help support me & DH, without being overbearing.

She always knows just what to say, and how to make me feel better about anything.

I’m back at work one day a week, and mum kindly has DD. (Now 17 months). They have the most wonderful bond, and DD idolises her. She is the most fun Nan you could possibly imagine.

On the days I’m not working, I usually hang out with her & DD somewhere!

My MIL is also lovely. (But no one comes close to my mum!)


WakeUpFromYourDreamAndScream · 11/10/2018 14:21

My Mam is amazing, she has my DD one full day a week for me just to give me a break (I'm a SAHM) and I'm able to go to her house any day with my DD just for company and adult conversation, she makes me lunch while I'm there and includes me in their cake day! She lends us money when we are short and is always on the end of the phone for advice. She's amazing my Mam ❤️


giggitey · 11/10/2018 15:48

Both mine also wonderful women who have made life so much easier. MIL brought us meals for weeks after birth of both dc, gave us money for a cleaner as a gift after dc born. DM sat up all night with colicky DD many times to let me go upstairs and get away from the screaming for a bit. So many things they do for us that just make life better.


2slicesoftoast · 11/10/2018 15:53

My Mum is grumpy but generally fairly amazing. She never expected me to have a child and so she loves being part of our lives.
Ex MIL is just the same! Even though her son and I are no longer together, she's the first to offer help when she knows I can't attend school events due to work.
Beautiful thread, OP x


kaytee87 · 11/10/2018 20:54

I have loved reading all about the wonderful and inspiring women (and men) in your life's throughout the day. Started this thread on a whim on my way to work as I was feeling really happy with my lot.
Sorry to hear from those of you who haven't been as lucky with their families and hope, as a pp said, that you can break the cycle.

OP posts:

dayswithaY · 12/10/2018 15:23

My Mum enjoys her lifestyle and when I asked her to look after my children just once she said "But what would I do with them?" MIL is a narcissistic nightmare who has told me she's cut me out of her will. I found it hard to read this thread as it's a life I will never have. I'm so happy that there are lovely families out there and I desperately want things to be different for my children. My DD is 13 and seems to hate me but I'm optimistic. I hope posters who have so much love around them do appreciate that not everyone has this and sometimes it explains certain behaviours.

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