To consider pausing TTC to avoid summer birthday?

[LegsOfGlass]

Currently TTC but considering pausing until January to avoid June/July/August. DH is really worried about academic disadvantage and less developed social skills and says there’s tons of research to back him up. I (as an August born who excelled academically 🎺🎺🎺) am not so worried.

WWYD? So far only trying for a couple of months and conceived in a just a few cycles previously.

It’s taken us 9 years to conceive. Life is far too short. What will be will be.

Both my eldest are summer born and had no issues at all when starting school and most of the summer born children haven't to be honest.

I'm a July baby and I can't say I've ever felt or been at a disadvantage to others in my year, I was in the top sets for everything and I was really good at sports (not so much now!).

I have also just had a July baby myself and it really doesn't worry me, the thought of it didn't even cross my mind until I joined Mumsnet.

Someone I work with did this, baby was due end of September. He ended up being born premature in July, and after that I bet the last thing his parents cared about was him being a summer baby!

Several of these threads always crop up this time of year.
My DS is August born and I'm going to request he doesn't start until the school year after he's 5 rather than before. It's the same of 4 weeks and would put him on a better start.

Can someone clear this up, i'm confused So summer baby, say July born would turn 5 in July then start school that August/September? I'm in Scotland so the school term starts mid August, i'm due baby #1 in January and feel he/she will be at a disadvantage as they'll either start school at 4 years 7 months and be probably the youngest in the class or 5 years 7 months and be probably the eldest in the class. From my school experience I’d say babies born April – September would be the best age??
Am I missing something? Or is it different in Scotland?

I was hoping for a spring/summer baby (would of preferred not to have Nov, Dec, Jan or Feb born) and landed due January because took longer to conceive than I expected so I wouldn’t put off ttc if I were you OP

Gosh, some of the responses on here are rather harsh! It's not like the OP is talking about aborting a summer born! Just pausing TTC.

OP, as a July born myself sent to a fairly academic school, I always felt at a disadvantage academically, physically and socially. Now maybe that would have been the case regardless of my birth month - you don't know for sure - but I don't think it helped, and I personally didn't want the same for my kids. Luckily we didn't seem to have any problems conceiving, and so have January and October babies. I realise not everyone has the luxury of this choice, and it's a pretty minor consideration in the grand scheme of things.

If it's your early days of TTC, I think there's no harm in pausing, if that's what you both agree, but if you are still trying at the same time next year I expect neither of you will be worrying about the birth month.

I would never even think of this! My nephew is youngest in his year and very bright, he's not been held back at all (now in secondary)

My youngest is a August baby and thriving! There are so many factors that affect academic success that you may drive yourself crazy worrying about it.

Also on the flip side my friend is a midwife. September is the busiest month for babies being born and she says it's chaos!

There is evidence that it can cause some disadvantage but that other factors (parental intelligence, home environment, socio-economic background etc) are far more influential. I wouldn’t get too hung up about it. I’m similar to you - second youngest in my year with a summer birthday and always top of the class

@Merrz Yes, it is different in Scotland. A July born starts just after 5. In England the poor thing would start just after 4!

These threads always make me feel a bit shit. We'd planned to try and avoid an August baby, but then I had two miscarriages and we stopped giving a shit about 'timing'. My DD was born in mid-August and I felt lucky to have had a baby at all. But it's not great to read that she'll be at a terrible disadvantage and will resent being August-born until she's a teenager...

That's because of all the alcohol and partys in December ChipsAreLife

Ahh ok that would make sense why it would be a disadvantage then, thanks @Shantotto

I was more concerned about not having a Christmas baby - I think it'd suck to have a birthday that got lost in the festive season, and selfishly I didn't really fancy having a newborn in the middle of winter.

None of this really matters though. As other PP have pointed out, there is so much you can't control or predict, and it's so very lucky to have a baby at all. There'll be loads to enjoy whenever it arrives.

My brother was the youngest in his year, he was also the smartest in his year and left school with all A* and all a at alevels and he has a degree in Maths from a very good university and he is very very clever and was born premature etc

I was born in the start of the school year and I’m dyslexic, crap at maths and defo do not have a degree with honours.

My point is not to brag but to say all kids are different, summer or Autum born.

I did exactly this - held off ttc until the January so I would have an Autumn baby. My body/DD1 had other ideas and she was born prematurely on 30th August.

She has generally been the youngest in the year at school (technically starting reception when she was still 3) but has done well academically. Emotionally, however, things have been much tougher.

Ah lady I have a Christmas and August baby!! I'm ticking all the boxes for shit birthdays

No sorry I wouldn’t very few month get pregnant within a month. I got pregnant first month trying with my oldest son, second child took 9 months of trying and eventually an ovulation pack. My third unplanned pregnancy happened whilst I was on the coil and ended in miscarriage.

You can pause ttc, but your baby could still come early - my daughter was due September 17th but was born on August 15th. We considered keeping her at home till the next year, but she was ready in so many ways and she loves it at school - she's just started year one.

Summer born babies are able to benefit from fresh air and sunshine in the first few months of their lives, AND have their birthday parties outside, instead of shut up in some hall with the heating on

No words

I used to care about this. Then I struggled to conceive DC2 and by the time we were successful he was born in July and I couldn't have given a monkeys.
He's doing very well, he's a bright boy and performing above the expected level in kS1 so it really wasn't a drama.

There are an awful lot of successful summer born children.

I have a July and March baby....I was just grateful to finally get pregnant after years of trying.
July baby is fine, taller then most in her year, great at sport and is doing really well academically. March baby is exactly the same.
Just relax...stressing over when baby may or may not be born (what if you plan for September but baby is 5/6 weeks early), will just make the TTC time very stressful.

Defer for a year and start them in reception (first bit is legal right and many LAs allow the second bit). Then they are the oldest in the year.

@CoughLaughfart if they're ttc they're probably not buggering about 😂 misses point of thread
My birthday is late August and I don't feel disadvantaged academically. It was annoying though in Sixth Form to be the last one to be able to drink legally, so there is that.