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AIBU?

To spend budgetting loan on something for myself?

87 replies

IAmInTheRoom · 10/10/2018 17:56

For context I am a single mother to a disabled 3 year old getting limited maintenance from her dad. We survive day-to-day on work I do 12 hours a week, IS, CTC and CB. I can’t work more due to DDs SN meaning I need to be able to drop everything and be there for her as she is often admitted to hospital with infections or spiked temperatures. She also has weekly appointments; it’s not unusual to have 3 appointments in a week. Her dad is neighing on useless pops in to her life for a couple of weeks at a time, moans about my apparent ineffective parenting then buggers off again complaining that I’m living the life of riley and he pays way too much maintenance. I spend £300 a month on Nursery fees which is worth every penny as it’s an amazing Nursery which DD loves but I have to work as many hours as I can to keep her there.

I took out a budgeting loan from IS of £800 (the full amount your entitled to). I now don’t need it for what I originally planned to use it for. I can pay it back early but it really doesn’t make much difference as a portion of my IS will be taken every week until it’s paid so either way it goes back into the pot.

So WIBU to use a bit on something for myself? Apart from £5 a month on a phone (which is almost as old as DD which I don’t begrudge at all) I never spend any money on myself. I’m still wearing clothes I bought as a teenager (I’m late 20s now). I’m not thinking a huge amount maybe £100 or so on some new clothes or some nice bath stuff. I am planning to also keep £100 or so back for a decent Christmas present for DD so it’s not all to spend on me.

Prepared to be flamed and told to hand all the money back to DWP.

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GreenLantern53 · 10/10/2018 17:59

Yanbu at all. Your paying it back.

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Aprilislonggone · 10/10/2018 18:01

Imo whatever makes you feel more able to fulfill your dm duties - which you do amazingly btw!!
Nobody would begrudge you something as basic as some new clothes op!

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ScentWorkBags · 10/10/2018 18:02

Go for it!

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GreenLantern53 · 10/10/2018 18:03

You really shouldnt feel bad about this, you have a child with a disability that your raising alone. you deserve some new clothes at the least.

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curlykaren · 10/10/2018 18:03

It's not DWPs money, it's yours under a loan agreement. Life is tough and you deserve a break sometimes, the only thing I would say is to keep some back for emergencies or maybe even wait until sale season to maximize the value. I didn't see Carers Allowance on your list, are you sure you are claiming your full entitlement?

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Thisreallyisafarce · 10/10/2018 18:04

Sounds reasonable to me. It's not like you don't need the new clothes, and you'll be paying it back.

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IAmInTheRoom · 10/10/2018 18:05

I earn £1 a week too much for carers allowance

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silkpyjamasallday · 10/10/2018 18:05

That sounds like a great idea OP, don't let anyone make you feel guilty about it.

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GenderApostate · 10/10/2018 18:07

Absolutely fine, treat yourself to some nice winter clothes and keep the majority in reserve for emergencies - stuff always breaks down before Xmas in my experience.

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Gingerrogered · 10/10/2018 18:08

The only thing I would caution you to think of is what if something urgent and expensive comes up in future and you can’t take out another loan? You’d be fucked and would probably end up with some awful doorstep lender. In your shoes I would say maybe spend half of it on yourself and half for an emergency. It’s an interest free loan, so take it, but do be conscious that you don’t want to create problems for yourself in the future with urgent costs and nowhere to go.

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Nolagerformethanks · 10/10/2018 18:09

I'd say go for it, it really sounds like you deserve a treat and you are paying the money back! My only advice would be don't spend it on a whim and decide what you would really like/need before going shopping. Don't buy something you may regret! Smile enjoy spoiling yourself!

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Nolagerformethanks · 10/10/2018 18:10

Also I second keeping a good chunk back for emergencies!

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IAmInTheRoom · 10/10/2018 18:12

I plan to keep what it costs me to run my flat (just under half) in reserve for emergencies.

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tibni · 10/10/2018 18:13

There are deductibles that might mean you can claim Carers. I know pension is one. Might be worth looking into

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IHaveBrilloHair · 10/10/2018 18:14

Do whatever you want.
Treat yourself.

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Cleo29 · 10/10/2018 18:15

You should look into carer's allowance further - you would get the carer's premium in IS. There are deductions you can make from your income to bring it under the £120 a week threshold - such as small pension contributions or if you are paying for childcare to enable you to work that can be deducted in some circumstances.

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TwoBlueFish · 10/10/2018 18:19

Are you submitting your childcare costs to carers? You can disregard all of childcare that you pay (up to a max of half your salary). If you’re still over the £120pw limit then pay double the excess into a pension (so £5 over, pay £10 into the pension), all employers have to offer a pension.

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Armchairanarchist · 10/10/2018 18:22

Put that pound into a pension then you'd be entitled to carer's allowance.

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Luciferthethird · 10/10/2018 18:24

Yes definitely apply for carers it will go to a decision maker, I get £1 too much I still get it. Also as others say childcare costs are taken off.

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Chestnut23 · 10/10/2018 18:25

I think it only makes sense to spend if it's interest free, otherwise you're just mugging yourself.

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Freezingbum · 10/10/2018 18:28

Not an expert but if you upped your hours to 16 a week would you be eligible for WTC which is more than CTC? Not sure if it would be the difference in what you would get for carers on top of you current wage though?

Also YANBU if it’s an interest free loan, as long as you can afford it?

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IAmInTheRoom · 10/10/2018 18:32

Can afford for a bit of my IS to be taken (it's no more than £5 per week they can take) with a few cut backs, but we won't starve or anything it just means no magazines for DD (she's got plenty of books and gets them sent home from Nursery anyway) or switching to slightly cheaper washing powder (same job it does though so no harm done).

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MyDcAreMarvel · 10/10/2018 18:36

Pay £1 a week extra into your pension. Also half childcare costs reduce your earned income. You will be around £35 a week better off.

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MyDcAreMarvel · 10/10/2018 18:37

Oh an yanbu.

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LolaPickle · 10/10/2018 18:43

YANBU at all

You do need something for yourself x

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