To spend budgetting loan on something for myself?

[IAmInTheRoom]

For context I am a single mother to a disabled 3 year old getting limited maintenance from her dad. We survive day-to-day on work I do 12 hours a week, IS, CTC and CB. I can’t work more due to DDs SN meaning I need to be able to drop everything and be there for her as she is often admitted to hospital with infections or spiked temperatures. She also has weekly appointments; it’s not unusual to have 3 appointments in a week. Her dad is neighing on useless pops in to her life for a couple of weeks at a time, moans about my apparent ineffective parenting then buggers off again complaining that I’m living the life of riley and he pays way too much maintenance. I spend £300 a month on Nursery fees which is worth every penny as it’s an amazing Nursery which DD loves but I have to work as many hours as I can to keep her there.

I took out a budgeting loan from IS of £800 (the full amount your entitled to). I now don’t need it for what I originally planned to use it for. I can pay it back early but it really doesn’t make much difference as a portion of my IS will be taken every week until it’s paid so either way it goes back into the pot.

So WIBU to use a bit on something for myself? Apart from £5 a month on a phone (which is almost as old as DD which I don’t begrudge at all) I never spend any money on myself. I’m still wearing clothes I bought as a teenager (I’m late 20s now). I’m not thinking a huge amount maybe £100 or so on some new clothes or some nice bath stuff. I am planning to also keep £100 or so back for a decent Christmas present for DD so it’s not all to spend on me.

Prepared to be flamed and told to hand all the money back to DWP.

DLA isn’t scored on points (PIP is but that’s for ages 16+). To get DLA you need to prove that your daughter needs substantially more care than a typical child of her age. Keep a diary of her extra care needs for a week or so, it’ll help you fill the form in and can be sent as evidence. If she needs at least an hours extra care then it’s worth reapplying.

I would pay it back in case you need it in the future. £5 a week is 3 years to pay back. What if you need something desperately during that time?

I think you deserve a medal op and more money!

Agree with bus. Don't get into debt for something non essential. You may need something more important than clothes during the next 3 years. The money is there for a safety net not for clothes or Xmas presents. It's not a gift, you will have to pay it back. Think of all the things you could spend 5 pounds a week on over the next 3 years.

Can’t see how you can earn £121/wk and still get IS? I think it’s worth making another phone call to check how much earnings they are taking into account.

Reasonable amounts on clothes, even for adults, and Christmas presents for DC are essential household spending not luxuries so don't feel guilty, as it sounds like you've underspent on these items in the past. Even the tightest budget needs to include these items.

Then as many others have said, if you keep the rest of the money back for emergencies like broken white goods, you'll have this money when you need it.

And when you've paid the l Ioan back, you'll be used to paying out the £5, so if you keep putting this away, you should always have a bit of money put aside for future irregular expenses. Maybe even try to add any spare change etc that you have to it?

But make sure any savings are in instant access cash accounts. Stocks and shares Isas are not the place for savings until after you have a few thousand in cash savings first.

You shouldn't ring the 'local job centre' to declare your earnings. You need to ring the Benefit Centre that actually pays your income support. It sounds very wrong to me and I work in fraud. I wouldn't like you to get caught out. Please phone and check that they know you are working. - 0345 608 8545

“You shouldn't ring the 'local job centre' to declare your earnings. You need to ring the Benefit Centre that actually pays your income support. It sounds very wrong to me and I work in fraud.”

You work in fraud? What kind of fraud?

Income support, like JSA and ESA, is paid by the DWP and contact is via the Job Centre. The job Centre is the “Benefit Centre” you are referring to.

OP says that she has declared her earnings. That’s all she has to do.

I Second the pp's saying re-apply, a few years ago before my auntie had both her hip replacements she couldn't walk, she needed crutches and or wheelchair and would often be in so much pain. She applied for DLA and was turned down twice, it was only when her HCP's told her to not give in, she applied for the third time and was successful and back paid. This was a few years ago but it was honestly awful seeing her going from working all her life to crawling to the toilet and DWP saying she wasn't disabled enough for any help. Don't give up, that's what they want to make people not bother claiming it x

@anotheremma - benefit fraud. And things have obviously changed since you had contact with the DWP.

And to the OP, were you working when you first claimed IS? If you started work after it first became payable - did the amount of IS change when you told them you were working? If it did then I apologise for mentioning it but if it the amount you were paid stayed the same after telling them about your £120 income then something is wrong. And I don't want it to get worse and for you to get into trouble

Yes do that, you've more than earned yourself a bit of relief. Save half of it 'in case' and do something nice for yourself. DONT tell the father or he'll hang around expecting to benefit from it. Do get benefits advice, a small adjustment to your earnings may help you.

Do it.

@ceecee32
“things have obviously changed since you had contact with the DWP.”
No need to be so patronising. I advise clients on benefits all the time. I doubt the rules have changed since Tuesday.

How to report
You can report a change of circumstances by:
calling the Jobcentre Plus helpline for existing benefit claims
writing to the Jobcentre Plus office that pays your Income Support - the address is on the letters you get about your Income Support
www.gov.uk/income-support/report-a-change-of-circumstances

Spend a little on yourself but on clothes/hair rather than bath stuff. It’s important to look smart for work.

Spend it on what you want it's there to help but I wouldn't waste it maybe buy some bits and save the rest, I put all of mine towards debts x

Looked into it and you must have a lot of debts to only have to pay back £5 a week. as they work out how much you can pay back by what other debts you have. is it worth taking out more loans? could you get clothes on ebay instead?

Of course YANBU. If it makes you feel guilty (it shouldn't), why not see it as a valuable life lesson for your child? Your DD needs to see you looking after yourself properly so she knows that self-care is a vital part of adult life. New clothes and toiletries are a necessity, not an extravagance!

Its not treating yourself to buy clothes that are replacing ones you've worn constantly for a decade, thats pretty essential and sensible spending imo. Go for it, make sure you buy decent quality, practical stuff that will last, if you can. A nice coat, good quality shoes that will serve you well for a while.

Looked into it and you must have a lot of debts
Wow.

You do know even on Ebay clothes cost money?

I get a budgeting loan every August. £400 on uniforms £400 for Christmas.

I can't save enough throughout the year. Am always on verge of being overdrawn.

Do you get Tax credits? My best friend earns £130 a week And gets £110 tax credits a week. It had been a life saver for her. She only works 8 hours a week.

Also don’t feel bad about spending £100 on yourself, you deserve it x

It's a viscous circle isn't it because if you could save what you are paying every year you'd be able to afford those things.

£400 on uniforms every year is ridiculous though, schools really should have an obligation to bring costs down Inn state schools

How are people spending this much on uniforms asda/tesco sell 2 packs of tops for £3-4 and trousers/skirts for £3/4 ?? Don't know why people spend so much all I get my son is a logo jumper for £15 and a book bag for £6 ? New shoes around £20, altogether £50 maximum

OP I think you WBVU not to spend some on yourself. You deserve something for your sometimes. It's amazing how much joy a new coat or boots (or both) can bring. Every day you wear them will feel good.

Definitely consider reapplying for DLA, OP.

It gets easier for a child to qualify as they get older, because their care and support needs are compared to a child of the same age without any health problems or additional needs. That's why it's hard to get DLA for babies: all babies need round the clock care.

A child who doesn't qualify at 2 or 3 might well qualify at 5, when you would expect most children to be able to dress themselves, go to the toilet unaided, feed themselves etc.