what has aibu taught you?

[ambereeree]

For me its always say no to a favour otherwise you'll end up asking if that person is a cf when you've been taken advantage of.

That no is a full sentence. That no response/reply is actually a reply. Also about Boundaries.

Lastly, my MIL was not so bad.

That people love to fill in information that isn't there

That people take lots of pleasure in being unkind, deliberately misinterpret the op and care more about grammar put downs than people’s dilemmas.

It’s been an eye opener how the anonymity gives people license to be nasty, I’ve not encountered such bitchyness since school.

That everyone is supposedly deeply ethical. If you drop £100 in the street, nobody will just pick it up and keep it.

To not start a thread in AIBU

Yep I'm with you there AdoreTheBeach my MIL is really not so bad either. I'm also pretty shocked at how many people go no contaact with family.

That a genuinely horrific number of women are putting up with the most incredibly shitty behaviour from their male partners.

Never believe everything you read on the internet. Especially if it’s written to give the biggest emotional hit.

I’ve also learned that I’m not doing a lot of things right in terms of lifestyle - my savings, career, house, marital status are all well below MN par .

That a lot of people seem to suffer with anxiety (and I don’t mean medically diagnosed).

That a lot of women are putting up with shockingly shit men, and that a lot more women than I thought don’t really enjoy motherhood.

It's taught me to look back on my own experiences and identify all sorts of issues - including gaslighting, alcoholism, sulking, doormatting and more. It's also given me some (at times, uncomfortable) insight into my own responses to these things and some tips for dealing with future occurrences.
I'll never be a saint - but I do find myself thinking twice now.

That women who are doing well financially provoke a fair bit of jealousy from some posters.

Justgetting, please drop that near me, I'll prove you wrong.

That if in doubt, the general consensus is usually LTB

That everyone seems to have anxiety

The sheer number of arseholes there are that would rather correct spelling and grammar than offer support.

That the word 'vulgar' is still in use by some.

That people can be deeply offended by literally anything.

That posters can be askholes..

Op: 'Aibu?'
(response from everyone): 'yabu'
Op: no i am not

That if someone in your house is obviously very unwell and in urgent need of medical attention you can spare a couple of hours to ask MN what to do (A&E now! Unanimous) and argue with the responses.

Anxiety is a get out clause for quite a few posters ie. You're an arse
OP: no i suffer from anxiety.
Its a piss take

I agree that often anxiety is used as a get out for practically anything. Yes, I realise that lots of people suffer with genuine, life limiting anxiety, others just use it an excuse. I'm anxious about lots of things but I still have to do them.

To log it with 101, whatever ‘it’ may be.

That people don't actually talk about what is bothering them, they wait until they can write about it on an internet forum instead.

That stepmothers are always the devil!

Didn’t realise I could use my (GP diagnosed) anxiety as a get out clause for dickery though, must try that one

A lot of the problems in Aibu never seem to come up in my life.
My friends are decent, we don't gossip about each other, everyone seems to be able to have A laugh and joke with their DPS. Father's don't 'baby sit their kids. If they are asked out and wife/ do is out they just say" sorry, Kaz ( or whoever,) is out then. No moaning.
My neighbours are nice. One side brings us food round for Eid and the other side are helping with our extension. I'm not saying we live in Utopia or anything but on some threads there us so much drama, anxiety, and rage. People are furious here instead of being a bit annoyed!
I read the threads and I walk myself through the scenario rather than jump to conclusions and often think that it is the OP that us the problem and they have created the issue.

I learnt to take a lot of AIBU with a pinch of salt along time ago, especially if it's not going the Ops way. An emotional hook us usually thrown in then!

Also MN may as well get rid if chat. Any old shite Is posted in AIBU, whether it is UR or not!
There's loads more but I'll stop now!

How nasty and judgemental people can be.