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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be livid how dolphins are portrayed compared to how they are?

666 replies

Otherwize · 06/10/2018 23:48

I am angry and sick and tired of how dolphins try and make out they are nice and friendly and cute when they are anything but. They are one of the most aggressive species in the animal kingdom, regularly involved in GANG RAPES of other dolphins that sometimes goes on for days, they also kill their OWN children so that the mother pays more attention to her husband dolphin so he can have sex with her without her being distracted by her child and they also are aggressive to humans when nobody is looking (I.e in the sea when nobody is around, not when they have an audience like at a sea world centre) But everyone says “aww dolphins are so cute and so friendly” but their not.

I think it’s because they look like they are always smiling and laughing that people think they are cute, but to me they look like they have evil eyes and cackling rather than laughing. People say alligators and crocodiles and snakes are evil what about dolphins? People only see the tame ones that like to show off to humans and do tricks and let us swim with them and stroke them and think all dolphins are like that but the ones in the wild are a different matter altogether.

Plus, people say that dolphins are clever because they use clicks to communicate with each other. Has nobody stopped to think that they may be clicking and conspiring amongst themselves?

I’m actually fuming, only because I just got back from someone showing holiday pics and they were going on and on about the dolphins and how they were so cute and I told them dolphins aren’t cute and they are dangerous and would they swim with and pet crocodiles? They Didn’t get why it was the same but any animal can turn against you and I have even saw footage of a dolphin purposely try to drown a human and drag them underwater. AND they also kill other sea baby animals and play volleyball with them, they don’t even eat them or are threatened by them, they just do it for a laugh. Why are they seen as friendly animals?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
17
Howlongtillbedtime · 07/10/2018 08:14

I have issues with pandas.

They are fucking idiots.

Or idiots that won't fuck.

I think our money would be better spent on a species that is prepared to put a bit of effort in to help itself.

Lazy dicks!

UnicornPug · 07/10/2018 08:15

I don’t like dolphins. The look too pleased with themselves.

twiglet · 07/10/2018 08:16

Oh my!

It's true that bottlenose dolphins are the bullies of the dolphin world and they are pretty frisky. Google Zafar the dolphin.....

oldgimmer78 · 07/10/2018 08:21

On a side note how do dolphins commit suicide?

NicoAndTheNiners · 07/10/2018 08:27

I believe they drown themselves.

picklemepopcorn · 07/10/2018 08:28

Who knew, dolphins are individuals!

When you've met one dolphin... you've met one dolphin. The next one could be a whole different kettle of fish...

Lweji · 07/10/2018 08:29

On a side note how do dolphins commit suicide?

They throw themselves at the beaches or swim up rivers.

Or maybe it's their mob that kills them.

NicoAndTheNiners · 07/10/2018 08:30

thoughtcatalog.com/jim-goad/2014/06/the-dolphin-who-killed-himself-over-a-broken-heart/

This dolphin drowned himself after a human spent a few weeks wanking him off and then left him.

ChicagoLil · 07/10/2018 08:31

Dolphins were using Max Clifford for their PR. Now that he was caught out himself, the dolphins' masks have slipped.

Rosehip10 · 07/10/2018 08:33

OP - I suggest you get help.

Suggest you also look up the term Anthropomorphism.

Lweji · 07/10/2018 08:34

You know the Bermuda triangle?
It's not aliens...

madcatladyforever · 07/10/2018 08:36

In other words they are exactly like humans. Cats are evil little bastards too.

MooFeatures · 07/10/2018 08:38

I generally struggle to get livid about any aquatic life form.

ChicagoLil · 07/10/2018 08:39

http://theweek.com/articles/474417/12-weirdest-animal-penises-earth-updated

Just leaving this here.

On another note, sharks have got two willies: one to use and one to hold on with.

Poloshot · 07/10/2018 08:41

Are you under the care of a professional?

Fruitflylady · 07/10/2018 08:42

Don’t forget to save some of your ire for the humble robin....hopping around pretending to be all cute and loveable, but sneakily hiding their aggressive streak for when they think we aren’t looking.
Fluffy little bastards!

Havaina · 07/10/2018 08:50

The wanking off of the dolphin is not that shocking, SeaWorld regularly wanked off their male killer whales for their semen.

Thankfully they stopped last tear, no more killer whales will be bred in captivity at SeaWorld.

Sadly, no similar commitment for dolphins. They continue to live miserable lives.

strawberrisc · 07/10/2018 08:52

Dolphins started the #Metoo movement and most are gender fluid.

Unfinishedkitchen · 07/10/2018 08:57

Swimmers were banned from swimming in Brittany after a sexually deviant dolphin kept rubbing itself up against them.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/world/2018/aug/27/single-porpoise-frisky-dolphin-zafar-prompts-brittany-swimming-ban

Robin2323 · 07/10/2018 08:57

Years ago I remember a story about dolphins
On more one occasion witness
Saw dolphins gang up on one dolphins and literally beat it to death.
They take turn in swimming violently into it.
No one could figure why they would do this. Confused

minniebow · 07/10/2018 08:59

ChristConfused Humans aren’t that friendly either. I think you’ll find we’re a lot worse than dolphins OP. Some projection going on?Wink

Matildatoldsuchdreadfullies · 07/10/2018 09:02

Hippopotomi - they don't just stand by, singing about glorious mud.

And peacocks. As far as I know they've never conspired to take over the universe. But those little beady eyes.... I'd ban 'em.

MorrisZapp · 07/10/2018 09:04

Totally agree about pandas. If you won't shag the one last remaining representative of the opposite sex because the ambient temperature of 18 degrees didn't coincide with that period 43 minutes after lunch when you're in heat for a nanosecond then yes, your species is doomed to fail.

LIVE WITH IT.

Turquoisesea · 07/10/2018 09:06

Oh this thread is so funny. I have just spat my tea out at double duck vaginas, corkscrew duck penis’s, wanking off dolphins and dolphin husbands!

LuckyDiamond · 07/10/2018 09:08

Has anyone mentioned swans yet? They’re cunts.

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