No to let my daughter wear make up?

[Florabella]

My daughter met is 11 - almost 12. She really wants to wear makeup (not to school) and tells me that most of her friends do (some do and some don't ).

She says she only wants-light make up for special occasions, but I know that would become every weekend! I had always said 13 before and make up. To me they are far to conscious of their appearance at too early an age.

What do you think? AIBU? I honestly don't know

Most teens wouldn't have a clue who Kate Moss is and are savvy enough to know that celebs don't necessarily use the products that they endorse. Rimmel seem to mainly push Cara Delevigne and Rita Ora these days (even though I've seen a KM lipstick)

Personally I think that the beauty industry is full of ugliness as it makes money on people's insecurities and unhappiness. Most countries allow animal testing too so moral is definitely not a word that can be associated with it.

The current trend of using YouTube to market to pre-teens is also worrying and far more damaging than KM's comments years before these children were even born,

Racecardriver, I'm genuinely bewildered that anyone into make up and skincare enough to hold Beauty Pie membership believes that make up destroys skin.

Can you explain exactly how foundation can destroy someone’s skin racecardriver?!

Because if that’s true, it’s a wonder they allow it to be sold 🙄.

Shady lady they allow cigarettes and alcohol etc to be sold. Not a great logic to apply there.

It will destroy her skin

How?

kids need to be taught the history behind some of these 'role models' - it appears that Moss is still paid by Rimmel.

Uk and EU tested makeup is harmless in itself. It is of course horribly wasteful (ickle cutesy pots, massive amounts of packaging, not an essential product) but we all have our failings.

I've never really got make up being a feminist issue

I see it as the same as the burka (ban) - sure, its use is influenced by the fact that we hold women to different standards of behaviour and appearance, but taking the option away doesn't make women more equal, just less free. I also kind of feel like, even if we were all convinced that makeup is bad (which I'm not), why would we burden 12 year olds with the responsibility of leading us to the feminist revolution by example? There is peer pressure, and that means there's a cost to being different, and I think that we should let kids decide for themselves where possible whether they want to pay that cost.

Fatisfook - cigarettes and alcohol both have age limits for purchase/consumption and the detrimental effects are widely publicised, including warning labels on the products themselves.

There’s no such precautions with make up. Skin lightening products, however, have recently been banned due to them damaging skin. I’d suggest the reason there is no age limit, warnings on packaging or out and out ban of makeup is due to the fact there are no detrimental health effects associated with wearing makeup. Allergies to certain ingredients are a different entity, but, I see hundreds of women and girls each day wearing lots of makeup and I can’t say I’ve ever seen anyone whose skin looks “destroyed”.

Smoking and sun damage destroy skin.

Not makeup.

(And given that just about all BB creams, CC creams, foundations and tinted moisturisers contain a decent SPF then it may actually protect skin for young women)

I have really dark kadhesdo brown mascara would have looked odd. My eyelashes are long and thick so i’ve always emphasised them.

Make up doesn’t damage skin (most has SPF so actuallynhelos protect it) I have a special cloth that removes even the heaviest make up just using warm water. I use the clean th to remove make up then a good cleanser and eye makeup remover. Always promote moisturiser after cleansing.

My dd is 11 she has blusher and a few lip balms she fiddles about with them at home and is perfectly content with that. I have a niece who is 12 who likes to wear a full face of subtle makeup. I would take her to boots get her a tinted moisturiser some clear mascara and a subtle lip gloss and be glad that she's taking some pride in her appearance.

I started wearing makeup at 11 because I had absolutely terrible acne from the time I was 10 until I was about 23. Even with antibiotics and going on the pill at 13...nothing helped. Luckily my Mum helped me learn how to put on a (medicated) foundation and enhance other things to detract from my bright red face. I learned to be fastidious with cleansing and taking care of it so no scarring (luckily!) and now I wear foundation once in a blue moon (in late 30s). I think it’s nice if you can show them how to use cosmetics appropriately as a fellow woman. Seeing everyone saying it’s crucjal to learn about skincare and taking it off properly!

*seconding everyone, not seeing.

One upside for DD1 is that it made her cleanse her face thoroughly when she takes it off. I bought her a set of Neutrogena cleanser, moisturiser etc when she was 11 and she has used these products ever since. She doesn't seem to get any spots.

I would take her to boots get her a tinted moisturiser some clear mascara and a subtle lip gloss and be glad that she's taking some pride in her appearance

Be glad that she feels she needs to colour in her face to meet societal expectations?

I’ll be glad she is doing well at school, is a well rounded child, and is confident and happy.

You do know that you don’t have to wear make up to be proud of how you look?

I had a mother who was always telling me to put a bit of lipstic on and “take a bit of pride in how you look”. Translated in my teenage brain to “you aren’t attractive so put some make up on to try and conceal it”.

To be clear I never wear makeup and my implication wasn't that you must to have taken pride in your appearance. But that this may be this particular child's way of doing just that. And that it is a better situation to be in than having a child that refuses to wash or take care of their hygiene.

I'd let her do basics ie some mascara, eyeshadow and lipglossas long as she started doing proper skin care routine - perfect time to get her in the habit