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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Please help settle this between me and OH (baby feeding related)

66 replies

sadkoala · 02/10/2018 21:14

Posting for traffic.

DS is 10mo and not a great sleeper. Wakes up around 4 times between 10pm-6am to BF. He won't take formula and will not settle without me giving him a feed.
Last night I gave him a feed at 2.20 am but he did not go back down like he usually does. He just alternated between babbling, crying and screeching like a banshee until 4.30 am when he finally went back to sleep after another feed. It might be teething (he currently has 2 full teeth and 4 half teeth which are coming through) or it might have just been one of those nights.

I feel like I'm not sure what caused this but OH is adamant that its the sugar balance in my diet and that I need to change it in order for DS to be more sated (this is his go to line every time I have had a tough night with DS btw) .
I pointed out that he only has 1 or 2 feeds through the day now and is mostly on solids - OH now reckons he is not getting enough vegetables in his diet and I should start adding more to his dishes.

I am prepared to be told I am in the wrong but I can't help but feel that OH is talking out of his backside.

Yesterday apart from 2 breastfeeds DS had

baby muesli with milk for breakfast
blueberries and toast
some Mamia tomato wheels to keep him occupied when I was shopping
greek style yogurt
chicken with mashed potatoes and peas (granted mostly chicken and mash but he did have a bit of peas too)

today wasn't much different but for dinner he had 50/50 chickpeas and pasta with mince, chopped tomatoes and a bit of cheese on top.

I feel like those meals aren't too bad veg wise? Or are they?

I guess the question is - do I need to up my DSs veg intake in order for him to sleep better or should I tell OH to shut it?

OP posts:

Orlande · 02/10/2018 21:17

No, you need to stop breastfeeding all night if you want him to sleep

He needs lots of milk feeds and protein in the day!

GunpowderGelatine · 02/10/2018 21:19

Ah, if only vegetables were the answer to those sleepless nights! The fact is, some babies just don't sleep, well, because they're babies and they're not always meant to sleep. There's no magic cure you're missing out on - it's just kind of how it is and any time or effort spent trying to shovel more veg in him will be wasted. Take it from a Mum whose children never slept through until about ages 2 (sorry probably not helpful) - that's just the way some babies are wired.

Believeitornot · 02/10/2018 21:21

Hahahaha as if you can just feed more in the day and he’ll sleep

Or eat more veg. Your oh is talking shit.

Aprilislonggone · 02/10/2018 21:21

I got ds sleeping through at 8 months on the third night sending dh in instead of me bf.

cadburyegg · 02/10/2018 21:23

They sleep when they are ready. I've bf both my sons, DS1 didn't sleep through consistently until he was 1, DS2 has slept through pretty consistently since he was 3 months old. Haven't done anything differently.

DoJo · 02/10/2018 21:24

Ha ha ha ha - if there was a specific ratio of vegetables to other food and milk that made babies sleep through the night and your husband discovered it, you would be millionaires! However, the truth is that some babies struggle to stay asleep - how you deal with that depends on your set up, and making sure he's eaten enough during the day will surely help, but there's no magic meal plan that will 'fix' his night waking.

FuckyDuzz · 02/10/2018 21:24

My first was formula fed and didn’t sleep through till he was 5 and my breastfed baby number 4 was sleeping through at 3 weeks old (and trust me I was not on a sugar free vegetable only diet!)
So there goes that theory

However - your DS’s days food doesn’t look to be very much of anything really besides dinner it’s just snacks, so maybe he’s not sleeping due to hunger?

Llanali · 02/10/2018 21:25

So I would be feeding more veggies, but not because I think it will make him sleep!
I’d just be aiming for a bigger variety of the rainbow in there.

garethsouthgatesmrs · 02/10/2018 21:25

My DD 12 months is like this. It's normal! Tell your DH to cook for him if he wants his diet changing. Your DH sounds like hard work.

And just to be clear you don't need to stop feeding him in the night whatever anyone else says its up to you when you start trying to wean or you can wait until he self seams. Don't let DH pressure you.

JassyRadlett · 02/10/2018 21:25

Your DH has some bizarre ideas.

I found lots of veg was the worst thing when mine were babies in terms of encouraging good chunks of sleep. The bulk fills them up but doesn’t give them nearly enough calories to get them through. For both mine, their sleep got worse when we started and increased solids. The bulk of their calories generally still comes from milk at that age.

garethsouthgatesmrs · 02/10/2018 21:26

Self weans

Original poster

sadkoala · 02/10/2018 21:26

So the replies so far are pretty much what I expected 😁

I'm tucked in bed trying for an early night to make up for yesterday but for the past 45mins I have been consistently hearing DS make little moan/babble sounds which is making me worried about what to expect tonight....

OP posts:

QueenOfMyWorld · 02/10/2018 21:26

Tbh my ds didn't sleep properly for the first 12 months .I think children go by the beat of their own drum

Lethaldrizzle · 02/10/2018 21:27

My dd was like this until I read a book about kids and sleep and apparently she wasn't sleeping enough during the day, she was kinda wired and waking up at night not because of food. (I was bf also) Anyway I followed the advice and it worked. 'Healthy sleep habits happy child'

WeShouldBeFriends · 02/10/2018 21:28

Vegetables will not make your baby sleep. I repeat, vegetables WILL NOT make your baby sleep.

Blackoutblinds · 02/10/2018 21:28

Where was his lunch? I see breakfast, some snacks, dinner. I don’t see lunch?

EwItsAHooman · 02/10/2018 21:29

I night-weaned all of mine at around a year old. I wore the most high-necked t-shirt I owned, tucked into pyjama bottoms, to block access then when they woke in the night wanting a feed I gave them cuddles instead. The first couple of nights were rough with pissed off little ones but by night 3-4 each time they had all stopped waking for a feed.

Ultimately, you have to do what works for you and what you're happy with. If you're happy to feed him in the night, then keep on. If you want him to sleep through, then don't offer a feed in the night.

Jupiter15 · 02/10/2018 21:29

It is normal for babies to wake at night. We are so far removed from what is normal in our society. Maybe your baby is hungry, thirsty, lonely, in pain with teeth, in a leap, who knows.
It is nothing to do with sugar in your diet. That’s not to say it’s not extremely annoying and tiring at times!

PotteringAlong · 02/10/2018 21:30

I’ve got 3. The middle one started sleeping through when i night weaker him. The other 2 didn’t. No milk, still wake up. The youngest one is 20 months old and still doesn’t sleep through. In fact, I’m sitting with him now as he’s woken up twice since 7pm...

PedunculatedPolp · 02/10/2018 21:30

Rub some Dentinox on his gums and especially before feeds of food or bf as if teeth are really sore then he won't want to eat even though he is hungry and so he will sleep even less as he needs a full tummy. I am on bad teether number 3!

Sparrowlegs248 · 02/10/2018 21:30

Oh tell your husband to do one. What a prick.

Blackoutblinds · 02/10/2018 21:32

Ps. Your oh is indeed a prick.

Millie2008 · 02/10/2018 21:33

I personally think it sounds like you’re doing an amazing job. It sounds like your DS is eating much more than my 10 month old DS currently is (also a nightmare sleeper!). I’m still doing several bf in the night, and I feel like it’s an age where they’re going through lots of developmental leaps so can be really unsettled/active at night - plus teething doesn’t help. We’ve tried different things a few times, like OH trying to settle instead of me etc., but nothing really works - agree with a pp that some babies are just rubbish sleepers! We just co-sleep now!

todaysname18 · 02/10/2018 21:33

Vegetables will definitely not make him sleep more and nor will less sugar in your diet. But I think he could do with some more veg, just for variety and to get him used to eating a wide range

SoyDora · 02/10/2018 21:35

Vegetables are good for all sorts of reasons. As a sleep aid? Useless.

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