Thinking of changing my baby's name at 11 weeks

[pab88]

I know this can be done and people do it but how do I know it is the right decision?

Had a very difficult time choosing DD's name which is Madelyn. Eventually gave up and let husband choose and we registered it. Never was 100% sure it was the right name. Now I find everyone shortens it and I hate the nickname. Stupid and hormonal, this obvious nickname did not strike me in the hospital and in the days after and it was a last minute decision.

I know it sounds horrible but I only had one name I loved and I felt like I couldnt use it because it was our neighbours DD's name, a coworker's name and it is DH's cousin's name (we never see her though). Hannah. This is bloody stupid but as soon as we get DD home and registered the neighbours announce they are moving. Then 2 weeks after that coworker transfers.

Been in tears a lot about this, been thinking about it a lot. It was the only name that we both really liked and agreed on. I think it is a result of overthinking this day in and day out and agonising about it, but now I am not even sure if Hannah is right for her now. I look at DD and think "I could get used to it" but if I go back in time I would have chosen what I wanted and said F everyone else.

DH says he doesn't care, likes both names, just wants me happy

Please tell me someone here has known of someone who changed a babys name? How did you know it was the right choice? I don't want to change it then regret THAT if that makes sense. But I don't want to regret not changing it while I had the chance. So difficult.

As I understand the birth certificate can be updated but it will always show the old name on the bottom and I don't know if I want that.

So so confused and sad, would appreciate your thoughts on this.

@AwdBovril

There was a name I'd liked since I was a child but a close relative had a DD shortly before me & chose the same name. So DH & I didn't feel we could use that name, & couldn't think of another we really liked. We chose another & I went along with it, thinking it would grow on me. It didn't, she is 6 now & I still don't like her name. Only DH knows in RL.

See, this is what I don't get. So WHAT if a close relative has a child with the same name? Are some people so precious that they think they own a name? My family has 3 Peters, and 2 Davids and 2 Emilys and 2 Karens. And 2 of my female cousins (who are sisters in their late 30's,) both have sons called Harry. It's no biggie, they both love the name, and both said they were calling their first born son Harry. No way was either one going to choose another name.

It seems to be a cardinal sin with some people to use a name that ANYone in the extended family has. If I made up my mind on a name, I would be having that name.

@pab88

shinycat - yes, I just feel a bit silly about all of this. I should have trusted my gut at the hospital and I just didn't and now I'm feeling that it's a bit too late. Though I think 50 years on, do I really want her to be known by her original name? I want to feel good about it. Thinking about zoo and shopping trips and such, I want to go with my daughter Hannah not Madelyn.

Don't worry about it too much!

The fact that you have a year after your baby's birth to change the name, shows that quite a number of people want to/need to do this!

So yeah, change it if it makes you happy. (and your DH is OK with it.)

FWIW, one of my friends changed her daughter's name (about 15 years ago now,) as she regretted it within about 3-4 weeks! She never regretted changing it, and her daughter thanks her for changing it, as she really dislikes the name!

Agree with a number of posters that the spelling - 'Madelyn' - is weird sorry OP. I read it as 'MAIDE-LINN,' and not 'MADDA-LINN' like it should be pronounced!

As has been said 'Hannah' is a sweet name. Go for it!

How do you feel about Linny/Lini as a NN? Maybe try to steer people away from Maddie and onto something that doesn't have the same connotations for you.

I know a couple of people who changed their DCs name when they were very young, the DC don't really have a clue about it or care. If it really bothers you then do it.

Don’t at all worry about this. I knew from about age 11 or 12 that I had been called something for around 2 months before my parents had a change of heart just like yours. They reverted to what they had wanted to call me all along. Was born on very momentous day and they put it down to whole country being in shock or similar !! Didn’t make a scrap of difference to ! First name was ok. So too is mine. We laugh about it.

Do it. Hannah - as well as being a lovely name and not very usual in this generation - has the beauty of being spellable and international. Madelyn will unfortunately be forever condemned to spelling out her name and saying ' yes, really'. There's nothing at all wrong with Maddie IMO, but if it doesn't work for you, it doesn't work for you.

Yes, just do it!

11 weeks is so short. You could maybe keep Madelyn as a middle name. (Fine to have 4 names!)

It's an interesting story. You can tell her when she's older she was Madelyn for 11 weeks then you added Hannah, that's a nice story IMO!

This thread has made me feel better about what I want to call my baby boy. I have always loved the name Harry but my sister's step-son is called Harry so I thought no way could I use that name but now it is back on the table I think! So what if there's two Harry's round the table at Christmas?!

Heron did they originally call you Diana?

Do it! Hannah is a very pretty name. I find your other name a little complicated.

Do it. Just do it.

I have done it. Not exactly the same as you because I only added a middle name into my son's name. My father died very suddenly when DS was 3 weeks old and I had just registered his birth. A few months later I went to the registry office and asked if I could re-register with my dad's name as a middle name - registrar didn't actually know if it could be done but discussed with a colleague and agreed she could. You have 1 year after the original registration to make the change. DS has two birth certificates now! I think you need to be happy and say go for it!!!

There’s a toddler Madeleine in our family. No one calls her Maddie, she’s always introduced as Madeleine and no one ever abbreviates it. I agree that the unique spelling you’ve gone for is a problem, people might be saying Maddie because they don’t know whether it’s supposed to be Made-Lyn, Mad-a-line, Mad-a-lyn. Hannah is lovely, I would change it now before baby knows any different.

Do it. You clearly love the name Hannah much, much more. 11 weeks is nothing, people will very quickly get used to it, and it’s not at all unusual to change a baby’s name so don’t worry about it!

Give it a trial at home for the next few weeks. Call your dd Hannah exclusively for that time and see how you feel then. You might realise you like Madelyn best after all or by the end of the trial she might be a Hannah to you (if you see what I mean) and you will still have time to change her name legally.

The only person I know who changed their child's name was a former work colleague who named her dd Gabrielle intending her nickname to be Elle/Ellie, she was horrified when everyone else called her dd Gabby. Like you she had never thought of that abbreviation though to the rest of us that was the obvious nickname. Her dd is now Elle, usually known as Ellie and as far as know my colleague never regretted the decisionto legally change her dd's name.

Like your association of the name Maddie with the school bully. I associate Lisa with a complete bitch at school. I have known several lovely Lisa's since but if anybody mentions the name my first thought is always of bitch Lisa not the lovely ones

OP the universal opinion seems to be here that Hannah is a really lovely name. I love it as it has a sweet serene sound to it, is a classic which has never entirely gone out of favour.
I’m not so keen on Madelyn and some people will have problems with pronunciation and spelling . The current fashion of adding. Z to nn means she’d be called Madz by her friends and Maddie by family friends
Your DD won’t see her bc until she’s much older and will most probably thank you for your good taste.
So if you want your first choice go for it ASAP and good luck

Yes,do it.
My niece said they couldn't use DS's name since we'd got there first. We said 'yes you can - it's a great name The more the merrier!'

It was a girl in the end (!) but it doesn't matter who else has the same name.You obviously love Hannah, you'll then be happy and so will your DH. Win win!

Not Diana. No was earlier and different country. And really shocking. JFK.

Our 10mo daughter is called Madeleine and I love it 😍 is it the spelling maybe that puts you off slightly (not that there's anything wrong with it)?

I also dislike the name Maddie but to everyone who's shortened it we've just said 'oh we're not calling her that, it's Madeleine' and that's been that. We've also taken to calling her Mads which suits her crazy nature

Having said that, if you really feel that her name is Hannah then go for it, everyone will have forgotten that was ever not her name within a few weeks. And your daughter will have no idea :)

Very good thought not dissimilar I think.

Hey I have a Madelyn, she's now 7. I had major issues with her name at the beginning (all down to MC) however she has grown into it. She loves the fact she has 5 names (Madelyn, Mads, Maddie, Madimoos, and some people who assume Madison)

She's mainly Mads by everyone. Guess it's the easiest but love she's got a classy name. Suits her well.

thank you so much ladies for your responses I really appreciate it.

Just a bit afraid to break the news to the family. I don't know how to do it.

Like someone said I will use her name in every day life and what, look at her birth certificate once or twice? Still bothers me for some reason.

We thought about moving her name to the middle but we've chosen her middle name after my grandmother who passed last year and DH isn't too keen on two middle names.

I am just so afraid of going through with this for some reason.

@pab88

my mother changed my name when I was 18 months old, just because a family moved in next door with a child with the same name & my mother didn't like the way they said it

I don't remember being traumatised, fwiw, & when I was old enough to know about it I thought it was funny. (I mean I've always thought the reason was bonkers but I prefer the second name anyway.)

So try not to fret. You're still in postnatal hormonal chaos atm. It'll be fine (& agree with others that Hannah is lovely)

Another nice thing about her name is that she's the only Madelyn or Madeleine etc in her school. It's classy but usual. She has 2 Hannah's and 4 Olivia's in her class!

Anyway go with your gut x

oh, also, my niece called her PFB the same name as one of ours & I was delighted (& her second has the name of another one of ours as a middle name). Granted they're c 20 years apart & don't see each other very often but it's not a problem.

I really like Madelyn, and people will shorten everything - even Hannah. My DB did change his sons name officially just before her started school - because his name had just drifted into a hybrid of his first and middle names. Why not try calling her Hannah for a couple of weeks and see how it feels, before making any decisions?